Last Minute Cancellation? Do I have right to upset?

[down_to_business]

Are you all really saying it's ok to cancel on an escort with a 4 hour time frame because the client is simply feeling wiped? That the escort should just get over it and temper his expectations because that's what real life is all about?

 

If so... how enlightened of all of you. If not, what wonderful proof of a double standard that escort time is valuable and clients time don't mean crap!

 

Personally, I expect every professional to live up to their commitments-- myself included. No one else's time is more valuable then my own and vice versa . To think otherwise is arrogant and shows a total lack of mutual respect and common courtesy.

[jjkrkwood]

Oh, @MikeyGMin, TR is such a lovely guy, just listen to his answer!

 

 

If being "lovely" is a way to get over on people, then Trump has NO fucking chance

[jjkrkwood]

Are you all really saying it's ok to cancel on an escort with a 4 hour time frame because the client is simply feeling wiped? That the escort should just get over it and temper his expectations because that's what real life is all about?

 

If so... how enlightened of all of you. If not, what wonderful proof of a double standard that escort time is valuable and clients time don't mean crap!

 

Personally, I expect every professional to live up to their commitments-- myself included. No one else's time is more valuable then my own and vice versa . To think otherwise is arrogant and shows a total lack of mutual respect and common courtesy.

 

Of course your intentions should always be to honor your committments, but in REAL life, shit DOES happen and its not always possible. You guys are all taking this way too seriously. This is NOT life or death. Its a Sex hookup.... If you cant go on with your day because your sex appt fell thru, than perhaps you need sexual therapy instead of sexual healing ? Put this shit in its proper perspective. I have yet to meet a person whose life was not touched by "sudden & unexpected" events.

[TopTierTop]

Time is one of my non-negotiables.

My time is my most precious resource.

I hire for convenience - sex on my terms/time table.

Otherwise, I would just save me a ton of money,

and just maintain a group of unreliable fuckbuddies.

 

For regulars, I do give a pass on the first cancellation - shit happens.

However, there is no second chance.

Same applies to tardiness. Longest wait-time I give regulars is 15 minutes.

My regulars know time is my pet-peeve. I discuss it upfront when I ask

someone to become my regular. They know what they are signing up for.

So far, in 10 years, I've had maybe a couple of cancellations and a handful

of tardy arrivals. Not bad in my eyes.

 

Now, @madjim, I treat this issue of cancellations and tardiness with

detachment. It keeps my heart from getting in the way of rational thinking.

My question to you: Did he hurt your feelings more than your time table?

You don't have to answer that here, but if your feelings were hurt, maybe it is

good for you to take a breather from this guy.

Very well said!

[TopTierTop]

Never ask this board a question and expect consistent answers. There are always shades of grey so you need to go with your gut. The fact that it is the second time he's done this to you does put a different angle on the situation.

 

@Truereview you never cease to surprise me. I have loved and chased Latinos my entire life. I could provide a long list of all the things I love about them, but punctuality is not one of them. I know this is a gross generalization, but you are a bit of a unicorn. (Alright, a mythical animal goes too far. How about a rare animal? A panda bear? )

I'm one of those habitually punctual Latinos also. If the client is paying for me to be there at 8. I am there AT 8! I have never been later than the result of hitting more traffic than could have been expected. Of course, I am in continuous contact with the client to let him know my status in those cases and he is agreeing to the new time. Setting a time and then just showing up somewhere NEAR that time, I have never done.

[Maximus69]

@madjim it was a lose/lose situation either way. He said he was wiped out/tired, so maybe it was best he said no to meeting. Do you really want an escort who's just going to be cranky, lay there and you do all the work ? I mean some guys like to worship and do all the work so maybe it didnt matter hehe I mean he could have shown up still but if he wasn't fully engaged and not giving it his all then you would have been upset as well

 

you have seen him multiple times and you enjoyed him, so give him another chance, but keep an eye out on him. If it keeps happen occasionally then maybe its time to invest in another regular. Not saying to dump him but, have him as a regular and also someone else too

[TopTierTop]

@madjim it was a lose/lose situation either way. He said he was wiped out/tired, so maybe it was best he said no to meeting. Do you really want an escort who's just going to be cranky, lay there and you do all the work ? I mean some guys like to worship and do all the work so maybe it didnt matter hehe I mean he could have shown up still but if he wasn't fully engaged and not giving it his all then you would have been upset as well

 

you have seen him multiple times and you enjoyed him, so give him another chance, but keep an eye out on him. If it keeps happen occasionally then maybe its time to invest in another regular. Not saying to dump him but, have him as a regular and also someone else too

Very much agree!

[+ José Soplanucas]

 

Seriously do I have a right to be pissed and should I cancelled the weekend trip all together?

 

I already cancelled the next date. When I did, he immediately ask if we were still on for the weekend.

 

Is the chemistry between you two really good? Often the best lovers are not the more professional ones. If sex is really good, I would get extremely upset.

 

I would get mad upset, and I would cancel the next meeting if there is one scheduled. Then I would start listening to his apologies. I would still be upset bot not mad anymore, I would be able to reasoning and listening to his excuses. I would then agree on a future meeting. I will continue being upset until the meeting. There is no sex like make up sex, specially when there is agreement on who the guilty one is.

[+ Truereview]

There is no sex like make up sex, specially when there is agreement on who the guilty one is.

http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/81/ee/9c/81ee9cac6bbfca55a9c5442309b47e2c.jpg

[madjim]

Of course your intentions should always be to honor your committments, but in REAL life, shit DOES happen and its not always possible. You guys are all taking this way too seriously. This is NOT life or death. Its a Sex hookup.... If you cant go on with your day because your sex appt fell thru, than perhaps you need sexual therapy instead of sexual healing ? Put this shit in its proper perspective. I have yet to meet a person whose life was not touched by "sudden & unexpected" events.

I appreciate your point that this is not "SERIOUS" as in life or death. However - no one said it was. Simply put - this is a BUSINESS DEAL. We made arrangements and with any business (if you like to keep your returning business) - you should do your best to stay true to your commitments. Especially from a repeat customer who spends heavily on your services.

[Mocha]

I appreciate your point that this is not "SERIOUS" as in life or death. However - no one said it was. Simply put - this is a BUSINESS DEAL. We made arrangements and with any business (if you like to keep your returning business) - you should do your best to stay to true to your commitments. Especially from a repeat customer who spends heavily on your services.

 

You have my full support and you are few of a hibernating breed. People don't see us as business deals much, but rather some sort of imagination or phone app creature of sorts.

 

However, if someone offers a counteroffer for another time it's much better than no call/no show. Sometimes with meeting a lot in a short span of time, stuff can inevitably happens and holidays are generally flaky for many...

[madjim]

I have yet to meet a person whose life was not touched by "sudden & unexpected" events.

Absolutely - but he suggested for us to meet and planned it with me a week before. And his reason was he was "wiped out." That is all I am saying. Up to you if you feel it is a fair excuse.

[tennisjock]

Absolutely - but he suggested for us to meet and planned it with me a week before. And his reason was he was "wiped out." That is all I am saying. Up to you if you feel it is a fair excuse.

This has happened to me before and after giving the escort reasonable doubt...when he did it again 3 rd time ..that's it and I moved on. Once I can understand even twice if legit .i like that he was honest and said he was too wiped to meet..I would be like u and want to meet anyway then be frustrated when he is pounding away and falls asleep mid stroke or worse not rise to the occasion at all...so he was honest with you. Has he reached out for another date? I would have in the back of my mind that he has done this twice and if it happened again..I need to find another regular and see this one sometimes but not number one..a 4hr advance notice is short notice but not unlike you are parked and walking to his front door

[+ José Soplanucas]

If you are so upset, perhaps the guy did not worth your money the first time. No one is perfect, but we tolerate each other because usually the virtues/benefits overpay for our flaws.

One of my favorite touring guys failed me already twice. But when we meet is like I am 30 years back when I was full of stamina and felt attractive. One of my local guys let me down three times already, but when we kiss I get lost and overwhelmed by the experience as if I still were a teen ager. I will continue hiring them no matter how many times we have to remake our plans, just because it worths it.

[jjkrkwood]

I appreciate your point that this is not "SERIOUS" as in life or death. However - no one said it was. Simply put - this is a BUSINESS DEAL. We made arrangements and with any business (if you like to keep your returning business) - you should do your best to stay to true to your commitments. Especially from a repeat customer who spends heavily on your services.

 

 

I am sure HE considered your points and still decided he needed to cancel.. At that point its over and you need to forget about it. If you choose not to engage him again, thats your decision. And of course noone said it was "life and death" but you are "actting" like it was. After your initial disappointment, the episode should have been discarded and forgotten. But certainly I cant, and shouldnt speak to your motivation for creating a thread about it. That shows it had some importance to you, which shouldnt be minimized.

[madjim]

I am sure HE considered your points and still decided he needed to cancel.. At that point its over and you need to forget about it. If you choose not to engage him again, thats your decision. And of course noone said it was "life and death" but you are "actting" like it was. After your initial disappointment, the episode should have been discarded and forgotten. But certainly I cant, and shouldnt speak to your motivation for creating a thread about it. That shows it had some importance to you, which shouldnt be minimized.

I can appreciate your point of view and I thank you for your input. I did take your insights into consideration. My reason to start the thread wasn't necessarily just out of anger, I am sorry if it came across strictly that way. I started the thread to see if it was common and how others have dealt with this issue with their regulars. It wasn't meant to vent and rant about why I felt slighted. Rather insights so I can make a better decision on how to approach it with him.

[AdamSmith]

I can appreciate your point of view and I thank you for your input. I did take your insights into consideration. My reason to start the thread wasn't necessarily just out of anger, I am sorry if it came across strictly that way. I started the thread to see if it was common and how others have dealt with this issue with their regulars. It wasn't meant to vent and rant about why I felt slighted. Rather insights so I can make a better decision on how to approach it with him.

What you said here is kind and wise. My first post was too harsh. But I meant a few harsh realistic things:

 

First, allow that even paid escorts are still people too, not machines, as many in this thread have noted, and need some allowance.

 

Second, step back and take a look at your deeper reasons for hiring paid sex companions, and use the information you find to discover and understand more about yourself.

 

You will understand that latter is not some masked judgmental condescending statement, but the opposite: I've hired >200 people, and learned and grown from most of them.

[jjkrkwood]

I can appreciate your point of view and I thank you for your input. I did take your insights into consideration. My reason to start the thread wasn't necessarily just out of anger, I am sorry if it came across strictly that way. I started the thread to see if it was common and how others have dealt with this issue with their regulars. It wasn't meant to vent and rant about why I felt slighted. Rather insights so I can make a better decision on how to approach it with him.

 

 

Venting and ranting is a good thing. It blows off steam, but that should be the end of it. Please try to examine the REAL reasons for your hurt. Perhaps there is some emotional attachment to this man that you werent in touch with before, and his cancellation seemed like he blew off a DATE that you were looking forward to and not an appointment on a professional level. Perhaps emotionally it seemed more "personal" to you. These things happen with hiring, guys you are attracted to giving you 1-on-1 personal attention is flattering, but also destructive if not kept in its proper perspective.

[madjim]

Venting and ranting is a good thing. It blows off steam, but that should be the end of it. Please try to examine the REAL reasons for your hurt. Perhaps there is some emotional attachment to this man that you werent in touch with before, and his cancellation seemed like he blew off a DATE that you were looking forward to and not an appointment on a professional level. Perhaps emotionally it seemed more "personal" to you. These things happen with hiring, guys you are attracted to giving you 1-on-1 personal attention is flattering, but also destructive if not kept in its proper perspective.

Thanks jjkrkwood for your input. I respectfully disagreed on the emotional aspect more so because I know you don't know me personally. As a business professional who owns businesses that scheduled daily - I know exactly what escorts deal with on the provider side in context of expections and delivery. My emotional "pissed off" as stated is in the way I felt treated and how the situation was handled by him. Customer Service if you like it in context of business.

 

It would been the same if it was non-sexual service from any other business - cater, hairdresser, etc. Again, I know they are escorts but it is still a business deal. I am just not sure if I want to continue business with someone like that and I feel that is fair question to have for anyone. I was more into what are industry standards, if there is even any, on issues of this nature.

[rvwnsd]

Thanks jjkrkwood for your input. I respectfully disagreed on the emotional aspect more so because I know you don't know me personally....

I'm not jjkrkwood nor do I know you, but I disagree with you and agree with jjkrkwood on the emotional aspect. In your original post you mentioned commitment several times. That sounds like an emotional investment to me. Re-read your post and think carefully about the meaning of the words you used and you will see what I mean.

[madjim]

I'm not jjkrkwood nor do I know you, but I disagree with you and agree with jjkrkwood on the emotional aspect. In your original post you mentioned commitment several times. That sounds like an emotional investment to me. Re-read your post and think carefully about the meaning of the words you used and you will see what I mean.

Thank you for the clarification and, again, I apologize if I am using the wrong terminology for "escorting". I come from a business background and meant it in a business aspect of "contractual agreement" and "customer loyalty" and not a relationship commitment. LOL sorry if I confused anyone. Again this is a BUSINESS DEAL.

 

Re-read your post and think carefully about the meaning of the words you used and you will see what I mean.

I don't think I used any of my words out of context. And I only mentioned the word "commitment" in my SECOND post to clarify my initial statement.

 

In business - your commitment to service and brand should be priority if you want to succeed. Commitment is not used exclusively for romantic/sexual relationships.

 

Again, I like the guy and I enjoy my time with him. My issue and why I am pissed off is how I felt treated and how he handled the situation in terms of customer service. I was emotional and I was angry but not because of some "secret" of being with escorts. I am completely 100% comfortable and clear on why I hire escorts and have no issues with that.

[madjim]

That sounds like an emotional investment to me.

 

Again, emotional investments is not limited to romantic or sexual relationships. I have expectations of all service providers of any business. I am spending my money and have a right to decide what provides the most valued for my hard earned cash. If I felt slighted by other service providers such as dry cleaners, airline company, etc. - I would not use them again as I have done.

 

Therefore my question of being "pissed off" is valid in TERMS OF commitment.

[madjim]

In reviewing this thread - many feel I have some emotional attachment to him and just got angry because I did't get to get off. I am sorry if you read it in that context and I should probably be much clearer in my posts (sorry didn't want to type a book). I am pondering this as BUSINESS question and that's it.

 

I don't have "serious" feelings nor am I am obessing over seeing this man (hence cancelling the next date and maybe the weekend). But as a regular customer who spends lots of money on the BUSINESS that HE is choosing to CONDUCT - I feel I should take into account 0f HOW I am treated as a client and loyal customer (thus the planning ahead and number of dates scheduled = a lot of money). And that his conduct and how he handled the situation could of been different in my mind since he had ampled time to review his decision and plans.

 

If anyone is spending thousands of dollars in one month on your business - I think commitment, conduct, and professionalism is not too much to ask.

[jjkrkwood]

In reviewing this thread - many feel I have some emotional attachment to him and just got angry because I did't get to get off. I am sorry if you read it in that context and I should probably be much clearer in my posts (sorry didn't want to type a book). I am pondering this as BUSINESS question and that's it.

 

I don't have "serious" feelings nor am I am obessing over seeing this man (hence cancelling the next date and maybe the weekend). But as a regular customer who spends lots of money on the BUSINESS that HE is choosing to CONDUCT - I feel I should take into account 0f HOW I am treated as a client and loyal customer (thus the planning ahead and number of dates scheduled = a lot of money). And that his conduct and how he handled the situation could of been different in my mind since he had ampled time to review his decision and plans.

 

If anyone is spending thousands of dollars in one month on your business - I think commitment, conduct, and professionalism is not too much to ask.

 

You are right, it certainly ISN'T, so if you arent getting your monies worth out of "your business transaction" my suggestion would be just to move on and FORGET business standard practices... I dont think there are any standards in escorting, it's every man for himself, and there will be times you will have disappointments. You may think the escort should respect you for "the thousands of dollars you spend on him", but perhaps that is exactly what is forming his opinion of you, a man to whom money is no object, and to whom a cancellation wouldnt matter because you can easily AFFORD to replace him quickly. IMO, he took the bigger hit, giving up your funding. You were just left with Blue Balls, something curable with the stroke of your right hand (or maybe your left ?) Bottom line here, if you've learned something from this, you came away a "Winner"...

[madjim]

You may think the escort should respect you for "the thousands of dollars you spend on him", but perhaps that is exactly what is forming his opinion of you, a man to whom money is no object, and to whom a cancellation wouldnt matter because you can easily AFFORD to replace him quickly. IMO, he took the bigger hit, giving up your funding. You were just left with Blue Balls, something curable with the stroke of your right hand (or maybe your left ?) Bottom line here, if you've learned something from this, you came away a "Winner"...

 

The reality is I don't feel like a winner. And like another poster said - it was a lose/lose situation.

I don't think a person should respect someone because of money - I think they should respect me when I show respect to them. Which I felt I did sincerely.