Fun outside of the sheets..

[Jbdesc]

So a couple weeks ago I hired someone. Someone that is not normally the type of person I'd be attracted to but one way or another I was lured in. When they arrived the realization that I was not attracted to them set in. Nothing to do with looks, strictly an age thing. I just broke the 30s border, and this person was 19. Too young for me, I should have stuck with my gut instincts.

 

Having been put in a position where I had to raise someone from the age of 14 until I sent them off to college - something igs me out about the age bracket.

 

Needless to say we had a good time relaxing, talking about the local culture and differences - we essentially just hung out for a while. I pushed back (in a subtle non aggressive way) on any attempt at an advance but I did what i thought was the respectable thing and kept him around for the allotted time we had discussed so he would get what he came over for. I'm not in the business of wasting anyone's time, and since the conversation was good I didn't see any reason to send him packing.

 

This brings me to my point, outside of being in the sheets or the heat of the moment - what do you find that you thoroughly enjoy doing with clients, or escorts? I've never really thought about the BFE aspect of things but I'd be down for some miniature golf and ice cream before the hole in one.

[instudiocity]

I like to bring an unopened bottle of wine as a gift, most often.

 

My regular brings out the glasses and the bottle opener so he can learn more about wine. And I enjoy discussing the wine(s) with him. We have on occasion spent an unpaid overnight in the wine country so I could show him around for which is always appreciative and I generally need a paid date within a day or so of our trip, you know, just to resolve some issues that arose during the wine country visit.

 

Bringing wine is an easy one in my mind. The escort has options: drink it with me; drink it later; re-gift it; open it with another client. I don't really care. I like to share fine wine with fine men.

[+ tylerthebadwolf]

This brings me to my point, outside of being in the sheets or the heat of the moment - what do you find that you thoroughly enjoy doing with clients, or escorts? I've never really thought about the BFE aspect of things but I'd be down for some miniature golf and ice cream before the hole in one.

 

BFE is what makes this work worth it for me. I love being able to spend copious amounts of real time with someone and really get to know who they are, and where they've been. Letting a natural rapport develop makes everything that happens afterwards so much more interesting. It makes the relationships I get to have so much richer and more sincere. I leave a good work date feeling like I do leaving a good personal date – hoping I get to see them again.

 

 

That said, I'm also a firm believer in a client getting exactly what they're looking for. It would bum me out a lot if I thought someone were simply tolerating my presence, instead of really enjoying our time together. I'd so much rather hear "this isn't going to work for me," in a polite tone at the outset than let somebody leave our encounter disappointed. I know that's not everyone's dream to say or hear, but there's nothing sexier than a man who knows what he wants. Even if it's not me this time.

 

 

-t

[Jbdesc]

@tylerthebadwolf Great advice. I definitely feel building rapport is very important; while I know it drives some people wild to just walk in the door and start their engines - I require mental stimulation.

 

That being said - should I have told him it isn't going to work, paid him and had him leave? I enjoyed our time together it just wasn't fully what I anticipated - and that is 100% on me. I thought I was being reasonable about the encounter but it sounds like maybe I didn't handle it right.

 

P.S. Love the website, very tastefully done!

[+ WmClarke]

Watching game 7 of the world series with an escort that is a Cubs fan was a lot of fun. I'm sure he didn't expect to spend so much time watching a baseball game but I think he really enjoyed it.

[+ glennnn]

I like the cuddling and touching after the sex very much. To just caress his face, stroke his cock a little, lie my head on his chest is heaven... No bull shit, no anxieties, no defenses, no secrets, no clothes. It fills my heart with a masculine love and acceptance I never felt as a child. it's what I'm there for I guess. I've been so lucky in my choice of escorts and other recent partners since they have given me this. Thanks guys!

[Reluctant Daddy]

While I absolutely love the inside the sheets aspect, I've recently discovered the outside the sheets aspect to be fun. I recently had an overnight, and had just as much fun with him at dinner, talking, and getting to know him as a person. I'm into a lot of movies, music and culture that normally doesn't appeal to someone my age, so the chance to have a real and honest conversation with someone who shares that was nice. Plus, as embarrassing as it may sound, he made me feel young.

[Rudynate]

I know a lot about fitness and working out (as a matter of fact, I'm toying with the idea of becoming a trainer). When I have really enjoyed a guy, I think about us going to the gym, having a nice training session together, and me showing him a little bit of what I know.

[+ Truereview]

what do you find that you thoroughly enjoy doing with...escorts?

With some escorts, I have great sexual chemistry, with others I have great social chemistry, and with very few I have the best of both worlds. The latter are those with whom I enjoy doing anything outside the sheets. Why? B/c it isn't about what you do with them, but how you feel with them. Do you feel heard, appreciated, sexy, or a better version of yourself? If so, that escort is delivering an intangible beyond the physical. With those escorts, I can go on an exotic vacation or enjoy a sumptuous meal, or I can simply go for a walk or share a pizza. When I have social and sexual chemistry with an escort, whatever we do together is just gift wrap for a present to myself.

[+ glennnn]

I haven't been as social with my escorts as I would like to be....yet! We talk before (haven't had an uninteresting one yet) and cuddle afterwards, but I feel awkward and shy to suggest any of the activities you guys describe. What if they have other appointments? Do I pay them to go get a drink with me? How do I know if it is off the clock? He has already given me so much, how do I ask for more? We've created a two-hour fantasy; I'm afraid I'll spoil it.

[mike carey]

@glennnn, basically you pay them, or expect to pay them, for whatever time you spend together. They will let you know if it is, or can be off the clock. If you have an overnight, when it ends can be flexible. I had breakfast and chatted with a companion after an overnight when it could well have finished earlier. There are no set rules.

[Rudynate]

I haven't been as social with my escorts as I would like to be....yet! We talk before (haven't had an uninteresting one yet) and cuddle afterwards, but I feel awkward and shy to suggest any of the activities you guys describe. What if they have other appointments? Do I pay them to go get a drink with me? How do I know if it is off the clock? He has already given me so much, how do I ask for more? We've created a two-hour fantasy; I'm afraid I'll spoil it.

 

I think it's implicit that most of the activities people are talking about would be on the clock.

 

One thing I have mentioned before is going to church with an escort. I grew up in the Episcopal church, and we never missed midnight Mass on Christmas Eve. As a kid, it may even have been the high point of the year for me, I liked it so much. My partner won't go to midnight Mass at Grace Cathedral with me because he has a knee-jerk aversion to mainstream Christianity, so I thought recently about hiring some great-looking arm candy to make the scene at Grace Cathedral on Christmas Eve. I'm not sure whether I will really do it, but I like thinking about it.

[MikeyGMin]

I haven't been as social with my escorts as I would like to be....yet! We talk before (haven't had an uninteresting one yet) and cuddle afterwards, but I feel awkward and shy to suggest any of the activities you guys describe. What if they have other appointments? Do I pay them to go get a drink with me? How do I know if it is off the clock? He has already given me so much, how do I ask for more? We've created a two-hour fantasy; I'm afraid I'll spoil it.

 

I think your instincts are correct, and as others have mentioned, if you suggest a "date" then you should treat it like an extended appointment with commensurate compensation. If HE suggests a date then you just have to bite the bullet and flat out ask if it's a hangout or a professional engagement. Just so you are comfortable that there is no confusion.

 

There are wonderful guys out there who are not o'clock watchers and will spend extra time after the sweaty stuff. I enjoy the conversation and getting to know the real person, but I never push it to a dinner invite or anything else. Others have reported that they do this and it is well received, but I choose never to put the gentleman in an awkward position.

[jawjateck]

With some escorts, I have great sexual chemistry, with others I have great social chemistry, and with very few I have the best of both worlds. The latter are those with whom I enjoy doing anything outside the sheets. Why? B/c it isn't about what you do with them, but how you feel with them. Do you feel heard, appreciated, sexy, or a better version of yourself? If so, that escort is delivering an intangible beyond the physical. With those escorts, I can go on an exotic vacation or enjoy a sumptuous meal, or I can simply go for a walk or share a pizza. When I have social and sexual chemistry with an escort, whatever we do together is just gift wrap for a present to myself.

 

<sigh>........TR is dreamy, aint he?

[mike carey]

<sigh>........TR is dreamy, aint he?

Yup, but now we have to travel to Punta del Este.

[+ glennnn]

Yup, but now we have to travel to Punta del Este.

 

I'm a travel agent. Perhaps I could put together a package to go see his package? LOL

[+ glennnn]

@glennnn, basically you pay them, or expect to pay them, for whatever time you spend together. They will let you know if it is, or can be off the clock. If you have an overnight, when it ends can be flexible. I had breakfast and chatted with a companion after an overnight when it could well have finished earlier. There are no set rules.

 

Thanks, Mike. That puts me on firmer ground for asking for a pre or post lunch date and still allows me to husband my limited hobby funds. The only problem would be who to be social with? Dane? Nate? Rod? Lance? Steven? TB? I love them all!!! Guess I'll work more days each week and take them one at a time. (going into my happy dance) :p:p:p:p:p:p (fuck Trump. Life is GOOD)

[+ glennnn]

I'm a travel agent. Perhaps I could put together a package to go see his package? LOL

 

 

Let's see. One from California. One from Australia (Sydney?) Where are you @jawjateck ? God's! The airfare alone would buy us a place in Punta del Este. Maybe we should bring @truereiew to a central point (Hawaii?) for a four-way? I know it's probably just his avatar, but he IS dreamy!!

[mike carey]

Hard to know, @glennnn, some of these guys may love to chill out with you and get to know you, others may not. Some of the sweetest guys may only be available for strictly on-clock meetings.

[Reluctant Daddy]

I haven't been as social with my escorts as I would like to be....yet! We talk before (haven't had an uninteresting one yet) and cuddle afterwards, but I feel awkward and shy to suggest any of the activities you guys describe. What if they have other appointments? Do I pay them to go get a drink with me? How do I know if it is off the clock? He has already given me so much, how do I ask for more? We've created a two-hour fantasy; I'm afraid I'll spoil it.

 

I've asked in advance whether someone would like to go to dinner, drinks, etc. and whether it's on or off the clock. I wanted to make sure that there weren't any misunderstandings and that I didn't embarrass myself assuming one way or the other. There are far too many variables in policy on this matter from guy to guy.

 

I have noticed a number of RM ads where providers specifically state that they do not charge for time spent doing those things (I'm assuming for 1 or multi hour sessions).

[+ glennnn]

Hard to know, @glennnn, some of these guys may love to chill out with you and get to know you, others may not. Some of the sweetest guys may only be available for strictly on-clock meetings.

 

No, I meant take each one for an on the clock date. That keeps it all clear and professional.

[liubit]

Plus, as embarrassing as it may sound, he made me feel young.

Not embarrassing at all, [uSER=12070]@NYClocker[/uSER], it is part of the charm. That's why I like my boys to be 19-25

[+ Lance_Navarro]

With some escorts, I have great sexual chemistry, with others I have great social chemistry, and with very few I have the best of both worlds. The latter are those with whom I enjoy doing anything outside the sheets. Why? B/c it isn't about what you do with them, but how you feel with them. Do you feel heard, appreciated, sexy, or a better version of yourself? If so, that escort is delivering an intangible beyond the physical. With those escorts, I can go on an exotic vacation or enjoy a sumptuous meal, or I can simply go for a walk or share a pizza. When I have social and sexual chemistry with an escort, whatever we do together is just gift wrap for a present to myself.

 

I'm ready to join you on that exotic vacation, whenever you are!

[+ tylerthebadwolf]

@tylerthebadwolf Great advice. I definitely feel building rapport is very important; while I know it drives some people wild to just walk in the door and start their engines - I require mental stimulation.

 

That being said - should I have told him it isn't going to work, paid him and had him leave? I enjoyed our time together it just wasn't fully what I anticipated - and that is 100% on me. I thought I was being reasonable about the encounter but it sounds like maybe I didn't handle it right.

 

P.S. Love the website, very tastefully done!

 

Wow! Thank you! That's very kind of you to say. I rarely get to hear what people think about my site.

 

And if I'm being honest, I wouldn't accept money if someone was sure I wasn't the guy for them. I know that's maybe not everyone's policy, and I think it's great you enjoyed your time, regardless. But I would have said "this isn't for me," apologized, and sent him on his way.

 

You were more than generous/reasonable, and I don't think there is a "right way" in any of these circumstances. I just tend to look at it from a 'customer is always right' standpoint, and take rejection in stride.

 

 

-tyler