Last Chance

[doitb4ugo]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9889aLS1J1rd2i9mo1_500.jpg

 

 

 

Posted with the following Caption:

 

Remember, once we’re inside, your safe word is no good anymore. If you’re going to use it, now’s the time.

[whipped guy]

Hot thought... but with any luck the Dom will act responsibly. Sorry to rain on the parade and I know I'm no fun... but I have experienced the bruises and burns to know that such a mind set is not the way to go. In fact just this week a good friend complained about a Dom going a bit too far...

 

Bottom line... If the Dom is only playing a mind game with the sub that is quite acceptable and certainly part of what BDSM is all about. However, while doing the scene he should bring the sub to the edge and not beyond his point of comfort... and only go beyond that point if the sub agrees to expand his horizons.

 

At any rate, sorry to always sound as though I am preaching... but I think most here know where I stand regarding this issue.

[Guest Wetnwildbear]

The Only One Who Could Ever . . .

 

At any rate, sorry to always sound as though I am preaching... but I think most here know where I stand regarding this issue.

 

The Only One Who Could Ever Teach me was the son of a preacher man - yes he was, yes he was, yes he was. Being good isnt always easy no matter how HARD I try!

 

[Adam_6969]

I have to second what WG says. Mind games are one thing and can really increase the eroticism of a given scene. But, if the reality is the safe word will be ignored, RED FLAG. A sensible sub will get the hell out immediately. I like to use Green, Yellow, Red as safe words. When the sub says Green it tells me his is totally into the scene, Yellow means all is okay but approaching the sub's limits. RED means stop not, this is no longer fun. If the sub is not enjoying what is happening, I don't have enjoyment either.

[ErieBear]

One thing that I did in a scene (as a sub), was I suggested and wanted to use a 1-10 scale, with 1 being "I'm completely okay with this" and 10 being "get me the hell out now". That was a different situation where it was a public situation and I was having some serious anxiety issues. Unfortunately, we went from a 7-10 in about 38 seconds and created a bit of a scene. It was ugly and the top didn't really understand anxiety issues at all.

[whipped guy]

I can relate to Erie’s anxiety in public issue. A similar thing happened to me a few years ago when I was going through a very stressful period in my life. As a "stress relieving measure" I felt the need to go for broke by having a certain body part flogged mercilessly at a club and in public. That did not bother me. However, in the process the guy put some nipple clamps on me that were unprotected and I was afraid that the sharp metal edges would cause bleeding… that was my main issue… I freaked out and he couldn’t comprehend my concerns and it got a bit ugly. Perhaps I overreacted, but that was my mindset at that point in time. At any rate, this individual has been a bit “cool” toward me ever since as he felt that I defied him. I guess some guys don’t like to be challenged…

 

Just one of the anecdotes that has helped form my opinions on this subject.

[+ Axiom2001]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9889aLS1J1rd2i9mo1_500.jpg

 

Damn, that top daddy looks like he could be one hot fuckin' man outside as well as in, but with me he'd definitely have to respect my

wishes of his "using me" short of hurting or inflicting any pain except for that which accompanies a slapped ass with open hand, then gloved!!

[raulgmanzo]

...if the reality is the safe word will be ignored, RED FLAG. A sensible sub will get the hell out immediately... If the sub is not enjoying what is happening, I don't have enjoyment either.

 

I agree but sometimes it seems like deep down some clients want a sadist for an escort/playmate. Seems that some guys want to be punished for an imagined sin. Which is frustrating because I want everyone to feel good about themselves and have a fun time. BDSM can and should be wholesome IMHO. In fact BDSM can be very therapeutic.

 

... It was ugly and the top didn't really understand anxiety issues at all.

I'm very sorry that happened to you. I suppose it is good that nobody got physically hurt.

When the top is bored with the client and expresses disrespect or lack of sensitivity to the client it can be a recipe for disaster.

 

... I was afraid that the sharp metal edges would cause bleeding… that was my main issue… I freaked out and he couldn’t comprehend my concerns and it got a bit ugly. Perhaps I overreacted, but that was my mindset at that point in time. At any rate, this individual has been a bit “cool” toward me ever since as he felt that I defied him. I guess some guys don’t like to be challenged…

 

The thing is that one cannot know everything about another, we have to accept that others may have an excellent (if unstated) reason for not wanting a certain activitiy or level of play. When the sub freaks, or uses a safeword etc, then the top should stop and rectify the situation WITHOUT question. AFTER things are under control, or in a different setting or session is the time to analyse, question and figure out if perhaps the sub was over reacting.

[+ poolboy48220]

All that said ... that is a totally hot picture.