How long do you keep it going?

[+ AceBanner]

A lot of my time is being spent with endless texts, e-mail, and photo sending to guys that don't seem to be serious. My nature is to never be unkind or disingenuous, but some of this is obviously not serious. How long do you let it go before you put on the brakes?

[Epigonos]

Ace I probably shouldn’t be answering this as I am a client rather than an escort. My only rational for responding is that I’m a serious client and hire on a regular basis. If I were you I would NOT play the photo game. Some guys are photo collectors and have no intention of hiring. You have a great selection of photo on your ad and there is really no reason to send out more. To my way of thinking two or three emails should be enough. Some of the emailers get a kick out of keeping you on the hook -- don't play their game. Further more after two or three emails the “potential” client should be prepared to provide his telephone number. If isn’t willing to do so, in by book, he isn’t serious. You really don’t have to be rude just stop answering his emails.

 

By the way I love your photo with the cowboy hat – very sexy. I look forward to meeting you in Palm Springs.

[JoeyBryant]

Only as long as I feel they aren't being serious.

 

I swear I am living in time-waster HELL right now. I've been getting requests and inquiries the past few days and it's just been people just keep flaking out left and right. It's turning me into a very angry person

 

I just sat on the phone talking with this guy and told him to text me his address and he doesn't even do it. Few minutes earlier, some guy contacts me with a skype phone number. I wasn't going to give him my apartment number. Never showed up anyway. Flakes, flakes flakes. I'm seriously about to just resort to mail-order appointments only. No phone calls, no emails. No conversations. Put the money in the mail along with your request.

 

One of my good regulars is coming into town tomorrow and I know I need to do some deep, deep, deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep meditation before he comes so I'm not moody. I love my fireplace.

[+ AceBanner]

Thanks Epiganos-

That's what I was thinking, but I don't want to be rude to a potential client. If they are talking about a schedule I keep that conversation, at least, but it's good to know that it should happen pretty early in the conversation. Thanks also for the compliments about the photos. The cowboy shot was done in Houston on Saturday. I try to keep things updated. I'm looking forward to meeting you, too.

 

JoeyBryant, I'm with you. however, I will say the guys who have hired me are LESS flaky than the guys I've actually dated! What does that say about my choice of men??? Lol

[JoeyBryant]

Thanks Epiganos-

The cowboy shot was done in Houston on Saturday. I try to keep things updated. I'm looking forward to meeting you, too.

 

JoeyBryant, I'm with you. however, I will say the guys who have hired me are LESS flaky than the guys I've actually dated! What does that say about my choice of men??? Lol

 

Well that's just too bad. Because if I met someone right now and we were still together 20 years later...I'd hope he'd still look like you. Men like you make me wish I was 40!

[+ AceBanner]

You'll have no problem being hot at any age, and if all goes well, you'll be there much too soon! Thanks for the compliments, sexy

Well that's just too bad. Because if I met someone right now and we were still together 20 years later...I'd hope he'd still look like you. Men like you make me wish I was 40!

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

A lot of my time is being spent with endless texts, e-mail, and photo sending to guys that don't seem to be serious. My nature is to never be unkind or disingenuous, but some of this is obviously not serious. How long do you let it go before you put on the brakes?

 

Take 10 minutes and write a list of stuff like this down and take it to PS.

 

I did it for DC and asked other escorts about a number of issues like travel, handling tickets, and other things I wasn't versed in. They were all very willing to help.

[rvwnsd]

A lot of my time is being spent with endless texts, e-mail, and photo sending to guys that don't seem to be serious. My nature is to never be unkind or disingenuous, but some of this is obviously not serious. How long do you let it go before you put on the brakes?

 

I think the answer is "it depends." In terms of pictures, you have twelve pictures accompanying your M4RN ad plus another twenty in the private album. How the hell many more pictures does someone need? If memory serves correctly, at one time you had a backpage ad that included three or four pictures, all of which appear to have been taken during the same time period and which show you in various stages of undress. Again, how many pictures does it take to get a good idea of what you look like? I think between one and five emails concerning what you do/don't get into and rate/availability should be sufficient.

[corndog]

When I contact an escort, I tend to be mindful of all the flakes and time wasters, and I think my messages err on the side of being way too direct and down-to-business. I worry sometimes that being too curt will start things off on the wrong foot. So, escorts, do you ever get a bad feeling about a new client due to brief and direct communication? I tend to gravitate toward providers who share all the pertinent information and photos in their ads, and once I've made up my mind, I set things up with very little small talk. A mistake?

[+ AceBanner]

 

I prefer a direct approach that let's me know the potential client is seriously interested, has good intentions, can carry a decent conversation, and what his "intos" are. Once the arrangements have been made to meet, I'm happy to keep the conversation going.

[bigvalboy]

Ace I probably shouldn’t be answering this as I am a client rather than an escort. My only rational for responding is that I’m a serious client and hire on a regular basis. If I were you I would NOT play the photo game. Some guys are photo collectors and have no intention of hiring. You have a great selection of photo on your ad and there is really no reason to send out more. To my way of thinking two or three emails should be enough. Some of the emailers get a kick out of keeping you on the hook -- don't play their game. Further more after two or three emails the “potential” client should be prepared to provide his telephone number. If isn’t willing to do so, in by book, he isn’t serious. You really don’t have to be rude just stop answering his emails.

 

By the way I love your photo with the cowboy hat – very sexy. I look forward to meeting you in Palm Springs.

 

I also hire fairly frequently, and I agree 100% with Epigonos. I never ask for a photo unless a face pic is not in his ad, and I rarely go past two or three emails before the hire takes place.

 

There have been a few rare occasions when an escort and I clicked, as an example Marc Dylan, in which case numerous emails were exchanged before the hire. but that is rare, and in fairness, those conversations only take place when the hire is already arranged. I do enjoy chatting with the escort via email, once the hire is set. It does allow me to get to know them better and on a level that while make the hire more enjoyable. I can imagine it being hard weeding out the serious clients from the photo collectors and others who just want to take your time unnecessarily.

 

I do think that there needs to be a balance. I get turned off if an escort responds to my questions or arrangements that I am making with a 5 word email back to me. For me, being that brief with a client is a turn off, and I rarely go through with the hire when that occurs.

[+ AceBanner]

Great insight! Thanks..and makes lots of sense .

[seeker630]

I also hire fairly frequently, and I agree 100% with Epigonos. I never ask for a photo unless a face pic is not in his ad, and I rarely go past two or three emails before the hire takes place.

 

There have been a few rare occasions when an escort and I clicked, as an example Marc Dylan, in which case numerous emails were exchanged before the hire. but that is rare, and in fairness, those conversations only take place when the hire is already arranged. I do enjoy chatting with the escort via email, once the hire is set. It does allow me to get to know them better and on a level that while make the hire more enjoyable. I can imagine it being hard weeding out the serious clients from the photo collectors and others who just want to take your time unnecessarily.

 

I do think that there needs to be a balance. I get turned off if an escort responds to my questions or arrangements that I am making with a 5 word email back to me. For me, being that brief with a client is a turn off, and I rarely go through with the hire when that occurs.

 

BVB, your last statement was the only addition I was going to make to this thread.

 

 

I tend to be very direct and fairly explicit (but not pornographic) in my initial email, describing myself & my 'into's'. On occasion, that may cause some escorts not to respond - but i assume that means they don't find me compatible, and it's better to establish that BEFORE a meeting than during! And I usually ask either for confirmation thjat the escort can meet my expectations and/or information on his preferences & limits. But if I ask several quesitons and then get a one-word reply, or an answer to only one of the questions, it rasies a flag for me that the escort may not be really be giving me much attention.

 

I do wonder if the channels affect the communication tho. I think younger escorts tend to be more terse if they're answering an email via a smartphone.

 

Regardless, I look for some indicaiton of interest or enthusiasm in an escort's replies.

[bigvalboy]

BVB, your last statement was the only addition I was going to make to this thread.

 

 

I tend to be very direct and fairly explicit (but not pornographic) in my initial email, describing myself & my 'into's'. On occasion, that may cause some escorts not to respond - but i assume that means they don't find me compatible, and it's better to establish that BEFORE a meeting than during! And I usually ask either for confirmation thjat the escort can meet my expectations and/or information on his preferences & limits. But if I ask several quesitons and then get a one-word reply, or an answer to only one of the questions, it rasies a flag for me that the escort may not be really be giving me much attention.

 

I do wonder if the channels affect the communication tho. I think younger escorts tend to be more terse if they're answering an email via a smartphone.

 

Regardless, I look for some indicaiton of interest or enthusiasm in an escort's replies.

 

Exactly the point I was trying make. It just screams lack of enthusiasm, and makes the encounter seem very cold and unfeeling...

[Frequentflier]

I sometimes get an email that has been standardized and provides basic information about the guy, usually money is for time, likes/interests, etc. Sometimes photos that aren't in the ad (like face pictures). Is that a good way for companions to reduce the time involved in email communication with potential clients? Subsequent emails can then cover anything that's not in the first provided and likely day/time availability. I've never understood the picture accumulation thing. Do people really get a picture and look at it even two days from now? I don't. I don't even save emails past when I absolutely need them (I'll add someone to my address book) and I don't like the unread email count - haha - it bugs me so its usually low or zero.

[Griffin Donavon]

I won't keep it going long at all, I don't show nudity to avoid this problem. After three messages and no app, I drop them. I pay attention to people who mean Business, ex Hi names joe was wondering if your available. I learned from a fellow friend it is important to not write short messages which I don't. However I think my fellow partners would agree when I say "Radar"

[Businessguy]

Consider the content

 

Ace - From a client's prospective, don't cut off the contact too soon - consider the content of the emails. I hire mostly when I'm traveling on business. I like to plan a week or more in advance. I hate calling for a same day appointment because some guys don't call back and you're left wondering if you should move onto another guy or what. And most of the really well-reviewed guys are busy so last minute appointments don't work so well.

So, I email in advance usually with specific dates in mind and ask for availability. Sometimes I get a "call me the day of" reply which does not work for me. However, if the guy is available, it usually takes a couple of emails to coordinate a date. Usually the emails are more logistical than sexual. I'll usually send my phone number in the second or third email but prefer to talk closer to the appointment. I find guys usually don't remember specific conversations if they are more than a day in advance. It must be hard to keep client details straight when you haven't even met yet. Emails seem to work better and are something they can refer to before the appointment. I always confirm by speaking to the guy at least by the day of.

I would agree that if the emails are asking for things covered in your ad or are for photos only, then politely ask them to contact you again when they are ready to schedule an appointment. After that, don't reply unless there are dates involved. I would not react negatively to a standard information attachment or even a reference to a well maintained and complete web site if that saves you a lot of time. Not everything has to be totally personalized. But if you cut off to soon or your answers are to short, you might miss out on a great client like me - grin!

[AdamSmith]

As a client, all this folderol will never cease to mystify me. I see an ad I like, I call, we make a date.

 

Five minutes on the phone together can be worth an encyclopedia of emails. For both parties.

[KMEM]

AS-

 

Don't try to simplify a gay's life. It is incontrovertibly entangled.

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[Atomicshawn]

I find it varies depending on the situation. If it is a new client coming in from out of town, I find they like more warm fuzzy and a few back and forth emails to seal the deal in their head which is A-OK with me. That always accompanies a phone call, at my request. One thing I do NOT do is text back and forth. I set up my bookings in a way that requires a phone call to confirm things. I never text more than a few times to a person. I see it as unnecessary and a waste of time for both parties. Email's, based on my experience with them, prove to be more serious than text messages overall. HOWEVER if it is a regular who I know and have a rapport with, I have no problem with that. It is more the nervous first-timers or clients who just aren't serious who make texting a less appealing method of communication.

[Steven_Draker]

Again, how many pictures does it take to get a good idea of what you look like?

 

Next time send him this. He'll get it ...

 

http://www.sydneyxraybondi.com.au/SiteMedia/w3svc1187/Uploads/Images/Digital-Xray.jpg

 

http://www.thedoctorstv.com/files/Image/1100/1100%20gallery/prostate%20exam.jpg

[JoeyBryant]

I find it varies depending on the situation. It is more the nervous first-timers or clients who just aren't serious who make texting a less appealing method of communication.

 

That what it ultimately boils down to. Especially if I'm traveling to see a client, I prefer to keep up communication just to make sure they haven't fallen off the face of the earth. If someone is local, that's a different story.

 

Add to clients who are 'nervous'. I'm about to just start shutting them off instantly the moment they say something like that. Seems like no matter what you tell them, they are still nervous and usually without a cause. They're nervous but they won't pick up the phone and call me.

 

JoeyBryant, I'm with you. however, I will say the guys who have hired me are LESS flaky than the guys I've actually dated! What does that say about my choice of men??? Lol

 

Social apps haven't just affected the escort industry, it's affected how guys view each other. They see you as simply a face on a screen that is disposable and can be tossed away at will with no reason. I have even made it all the way to date 3 (which 99.9% of the time is as far as it goes) and they pull a 'fade-away' on the day of the 4th date, then do something stupid like text me a few days later with some lame excuse that has NOTHING to do with him and me. It's just just so STUPID. Seems like they're never satisfied. They will nit-pick on every little thing about someone. I know because I've gone on 50 million dates from these silly app sites and they all do the same thing, no matter how much fun you had, or how hard you refrained from sex, or how much you tried to 'be yourself'. They are right back online, doing the same thing to everybody else they meet.

 

Even though we meet clients online, they are generally of a different breed. They don't have time for endless hookups...they are busy (generally speaking here). So they'll call back again whether it be 2 weeks or 2 months later. Hell, atleast you get the end result of what you want: payment. The end result for me with these 'dating' apps is to find someone to 'date'. It doesn't even serve it's purpose. It's just meeting up with a bunch of strangers wasting your time.

[+ AceBanner]

The phone calling guys seem to be more serious than the texting guys. Unfortunately, I can't always take calls and guys are really hesitant to leave messages. I'll stick to texts and e-mails and just use better judgement.

Thanks for the input, everybody!

[gnosvos]

That's definitely a tricky question of balance, especially for me as I'm brand new to any of this. For me if I contact someone, I've put serious thought into it and already decided that they are a very likely hire, but I'd also like to establish a connection of sorts to get to know the person a little, or a sense of what their personality is. So that too much too little can be a tricky balance, as I wouldn't want them to think I'm not serious or trying to waste their time. But I also believe that whatever's meant to happen is meant to happen, so if it doesn't work out it was probably for the best!

[UconnFlyer]

The funny thing for me (from the client's perspective) is that I've had a hard time getting escorts to commit. I'm ready to go, but the escort is hemming and hawing over dates. I feel like I'm trying to get a last minute appointment with a world famous doctor.