Backpage advice

[Frequentflier]

So I contacted a guy on Backpage and am looking for comments, suggestions and of course a reminder of best practices before going forward and meeting the guy. Even ok with "what are you thinking? No way should you meet up with someone that way".

 

Good pictures on ad, sane comments, subsequent pictures match, phone conversation pending. Rates are reasonable. Doesn't at all appear to be a "professional" and no reviews anywhere.

 

I just happen to be in an area this weekend and next week where there is, basically, NOBODY.

[Gar1eth]

So I contacted a guy on Backpage and am looking for comments, suggestions and of course a reminder of best practices before going forward and meeting the guy. Even ok with "what are you thinking? No way should you meet up with someone that way".

 

Good pictures on ad, sane comments, subsequent pictures match, phone conversation pending. Rates are reasonable. Doesn't at all appear to be a "professional" and no reviews anywhere.

 

I just happen to be in an area this weekend and next week where there is, basically, NOBODY.

 

You might meet him in a bar 1st. I met a guy from backpage- does erotic massage or escort. For some reason he wants to stay off the main sites and only advertises on Backpage or Adam 4 Adam. So you can find good guys. You just never know.

 

Gman

[anotherjohnindupont]

You might meet him in a bar 1st. I met a guy from backpage- does erotic massage or escort. For some reason he wants to stay off the main sites and only advertises on Backpage or Adam 4 Adam. So you can find good guys. You just never know.

 

Gman

 

I don't thin escorts who want privacy would meet a client at a bar, but I've heard some do it...

 

You need to have "stomach" do be an escort, when we were young, did we ever get a hard on looking at a guy in his 50's at a gym's locker room?

 

I know some guys here have the fantasy of finding a guy online and become his "helpful older brother" instead of paying a pornstar, also some young guys value privacy over other things but if I was you I'd rather hiring someone who does it in a professional way, and not just to get by or get some beer money.

[humboldt]

Hi There,

 

Are you willing to post a link to his ad to see if anyone has any experience or insights? If you are not yet comfortable doing so, I completely understand! But, in my experience, this forum has been extremely helpful when I've shared links.

 

I certainly wish you all the best in this endeavor!

[Frequentflier]

So here's closure for my BP experience. I wanted to have at least a brief conversation with the guy on the phone before agreeing to meet. Something about hearing someone's voice and having even a short conversation helps me make a decision. He gave a story about his phone belonging to his employer, etc, etc. so he asked if we could stick to email (nothing explicit was discussed - I told him up front not to cover any donation in an email - call me paranoid). So, we agreed to meet at the bar in my hotel, have a quick drink, dinner and then the overnight. i described myself in one of the emails we swapped. After waiting 10 minutes past when we were supposed to meet I emailed him. The email bounced back. About 15 minutes late a guy comes up to me and its "him". He was using somebody else's photos. I told him I had a big issue with that and is answer was - "its my ex - he cheated". The guy was decent looking (not as good looking as his former boyfriend assuming the pictures were even of a former boyfriend). He wanted to go ahead with the session but I told him no. Didn't like the bait and switch and I value my safety too much. Had to give him some harsh looks so he knew to stop talking and disappear but no big drama.

 

Doesn't turn me off BP because the same thing can happen off RB or M4RN, etc.

 

I'd post the link but uncomfortable doing that knowing the guy is using someone else's photos.

[humboldt]

I'm really sorry that you had that experience! But it sounds as though you handled it perfectly. About a decade ago, when I first started hiring, I was in DC and contacted a guy to see if he could come to my hotel. The guy who showed up was *not* the same guy in ad. And I didn't find him attractive at all. But I was too nervous and too chicken to even say anything. So we went ahead with the appointment. We ended up going over by about 10 minutes (my fault, since I needed another drink before beginning with him), and he demanded more money to cover that time. I should have asked if I should give the money to him or to the guy whose photos he was using. Again, I was too chicken. (For the record, if I go over a little bit with most guys, I give them a good tip... especially if they're using their own photos. Lol.)

 

So I admire the way you approached this. Deciding to meet in the hotel bar was a great idea!

 

I hope your next encounter goes better.

[+ azdr0710]

thanks, FF, for your post....reports of actual experiences like yours can help others here who are still getting used to how to handle this business....

[Gar1eth]

thanks, FF, for your post....reports of actual experiences like yours can help others here who are still getting used to how to handle this business....

 

But it's not very helpful in keeping the rest of us away from this specific scammer as we don't know what city the OP is in and he won't post the Backpage link he responded too. And as these scammers often move from city to city- none of the rest of us Forum Members will be able to profit from the OP's detective work.

 

Gman

[Frequentflier]

But it's not very helpful in keeping the rest of us away from this specific scammer as we don't know what city the OP is in and he won't post the Backpage link he responded too. And as these scammers often move from city to city- none of the rest of us Forum Members will be able to profit from the OP's detective work.

 

Gman

 

I struggle with knowingly expanding the distribution of the "innocent boyfriends" pictures. As of this morning, the guys ad isn't on BP. I'll periodically check for it while thinking about this. Also, if I get specific with a link, shouldn't a review be submitted with his email address (assuming it still works) so the site can contact the guy to give an opportunity to comment? Otherwise anyone could say any ad is a fake. Starting to think I should have just kept silent and nothing changes the "moral of the story" about meeting in public with a first timer regardless of what site you meet him from.

[MalcomXpark]

So here's closure for my BP experience. I wanted to have at least a brief conversation with the guy on the phone before agreeing to meet. Something about hearing someone's voice and having even a short conversation helps me make a decision. He gave a story about his phone belonging to his employer, etc, etc. so he asked if we could stick to email (nothing explicit was discussed - I told him up front not to cover any donation in an email - call me paranoid). So, we agreed to meet at the bar in my hotel, have a quick drink, dinner and then the overnight. i described myself in one of the emails we swapped. After waiting 10 minutes past when we were supposed to meet I emailed him. The email bounced back. About 15 minutes late a guy comes up to me and its "him". He was using somebody else's photos. I told him I had a big issue with that and is answer was - "its my ex - he cheated". The guy was decent looking (not as good looking as his former boyfriend assuming the pictures were even of a former boyfriend). He wanted to go ahead with the session but I told him no. Didn't like the bait and switch and I value my safety too much. Had to give him some harsh looks so he knew to stop talking and disappear but no big drama.

 

Doesn't turn me off BP because the same thing can happen off RB or M4RN, etc.

 

I'd post the link but uncomfortable doing that knowing the guy is using someone else's photos.

 

I'm so sorry for you, what a waste of time. I wonder if he didn't have something else to do but to waste your time and his too. Such a complete loser!

[Frequentflier]

I'm so sorry for you, what a waste of time. I wonder if he didn't have something else to do but to waste your time and his too.!

 

And I can imagine some men would go ahead with the session if the guy wasn't horrendous looking. The guy who showed up wasn't as good looking as the ad, but wasn't ugly by any definition. I wasn't going to reward him for his bait and switch, had my mind fixed on the guy in the ad and I didn't think it very safe to get in a room with someone who plays his games.

[Frequentflier]

I hope your next encounter goes better.

 

Thank you !

[anotherjohnindupont]

And I can imagine some men would go ahead with the session if the guy wasn't horrendous looking. The guy who showed up wasn't as good looking as the ad, but wasn't ugly by any definition. I wasn't going to reward him for his bait and switch, had my mind fixed on the guy in the ad and I didn't think it very safe to get in a room with someone who plays his games.

 

Smart choice!

[robberbaron4u]

"Backpage" is, more often than not, the "used car lot" of the escort industry, and, "buyer beware" is the watchword in making a hire.

[down_to_business]

The escort I see the most was hired unreviewed off a backpage ad. He is absolutely one of the best escorts I have ever met, have hired him for multiple hires, spent hours, overnights, weekends and on deck for a week long+ engagement. If you ignore backpage just because its backpage, you might miss out on some really great guys.

[maninsoma]

The escort I see the most was hired unreviewed off a backpage ad. He is absolutely one of the best escorts I have ever met, have hired him for multiple hires, spent hours, overnights, weekends and on deck for a week long+ engagement. If you ignore backpage just because its backpage, you might miss out on some really great guys.

 

I would say the same thing about a guy I hired regularly for years that I met off a Craigslist ad several years ago. He was a college student who didn't want a permanent listing on any escort website, so he only posted occasional ads on CL when he was available. I liked him so much that I offered to review him on HooBoy's website but he didn't want the extra attention/business. He was a real cutie, sweet guy, and a lot of fun in bed -- all for about half the then-average rate.

 

I say you roll the dice and take your chances. I wouldn't automatically rule out anyone simply based on where he advertises since, in my experience, I can be disappointed by guys who are listed on Rentboy just as much as those escorting "on the downlow."

[Guest boiworship08]

The LA Backpage, which can include OC and the Inland Empire, always has a few diamonds.

[Frequentflier]

Those of you in cities like NY and LA have it so easy with bunches of hot escorts to choose from. Hell, I imagine you come and find one just lying on your couch waiting for you. Maybe some of the aforementioned OC/Inland Empire diamonds will wind up getting reviewed and those of us that don't live in a metropolis can get them to travel!

[Guest boiworship08]

Those of you in cities like NY and LA have it so easy with bunches of hot escorts to choose from. Hell, I imagine you come and find one just lying on your couch waiting for you. Maybe some of the aforementioned OC/Inland Empire diamonds will wind up getting reviewed and those of us that don't live in a metropolis can get them to travel!

I'd like to review two of them but they don't want any publicity. They took their ads down after a week or so even though they regularly visit me.

[Frequentflier]

even though they regularly visit me.

 

Aha...you want your hot/hot/hot young studs to yourself. The old "they don't want the publicity" explanation. I get it. All the many/many/many years (lending each other cars, money, women) we've known each other and this is where we are Ok, maybe we didn't swap women.

[Guest boiworship08]

Aha...you want your hot/hot/hot young studs to yourself. The old "they don't want the publicity" explanation. I get it. All the many/many/many years (lending each other cars, money, women) we've known each other and this is where we are Ok, maybe we didn't swap women.

 

I've trained them to cater to my fetishes and I think they enjoy the role!