DOs and DON'Ts

[BostonPhil]

What about nicely saying "I don't respond to this type of question." Acting like you never got the message will make your potential client feel he is being ignored, or worse, cause him to repeatedly ask the same question.

 

Because ANY acknowledgement can be seen as me saying I do accept money for sex. We err on the side of caution rather than risk getting scooped up, and I'm not the real target....

 

You never hear about the escorts getting busted but what a scandal if they get a seach warrant for my phone records and email.

[Guest countryboywny]

Because ANY acknowledgement can be seen as me saying I do accept money for sex. We err on the side of caution rather than risk getting scooped up, and I'm not the real target....

 

You never hear about the escorts getting busted but what a scandal if they get a seach warrant for my phone records and email.

 

OK, I get it. Just trying to help.

[Guest countryboywny]

Just call me and leave me your hotel and room number! Wait—what?

 

Great! Expect my call! LOL

[josephga]

What about nicely saying "I don't respond to this type of question." Acting like you never got the message will make your potential client feel he is being ignored, or worse, cause him to repeatedly ask the same question.

 

When I get messages Like that I message them back and tell them to please conduction themselves in a professional manner when conversing with me or move on. then they stop and we set up an appointment or they keep on and I tell them to FUCK OFF

[Guest countryboywny]

When I get messages Like that I message them back and tell them to please conduction themselves in a professional manner when conversing with me or move on. then they stop and we set up an appointment or they keep on and I tell them to FUCK OFF

 

Good idea!

[maxwellissmart]

Good idea!

 

Gotta be careful doing that at times—people can get vindictive, especially if they know you do incalls at your home.

[raulgmanzo]

When I get messages Like that I message them back and tell them to please conduction themselves in a professional manner when conversing with me or move on. then they stop and we set up an appointment or they keep on and I tell them to FUCK OFF

 

IMHO a professional (i.e. you, me, or the customer service rep for AT&T etc) should NEVER tell the customer or potential customer that they need speak, or act professionally. Unless you are in a Business-to-Business industry the customer is NOT a professional at least not in this context.

 

I consider it part of my job as a professional to communicate with people come from all walks of life and ways of speaking and who may be have no experience dealing with someone like you, me or anybody in such a capacity. Remember that they may be new to this all, and even when they are experienced they will still be the customer and NOT the professional.

 

Though of course you have the right to set whatever standards of civitly you desire from your customers and I agree that at some point one probably does need to draw a line, and at some point most of us will lose our patience and find ourselves perhaps refusing to deal with some rude. Hopefully our refusal will be done by us in a PROFESSIONAL manner and hopefully it will be accepted by the ex-client-to-be in a CIVIL manner.

[maxwellissmart]

Okay—here's an update to one of the things I posted in the OP.

 

A client contacted me in May and we shared a number of emails back and forth, and there were two issues. One, he was kinda far away and two—he went from being self-described as "easy" to being actually fairly demanding. He wanted me to do a lot of roleplay and acting which I just don't get into and don't think I do well anyway—so I was honest with him and said I didn't think we would be a good match. He was like "no problem, thank you for being honest with me."

 

A month later (i.e. present day), I get another set of emails that want me to go to the same place—and the emails have a vague similarity to something I've heard before. I start searching and bingo—it's him. Same description, same place, same likes/dislikes.

 

If this were you, what would YOU do? Clients—feel free to add your 2¢ worth.

[unsub2O17]

Okay—here's an update to one of the things I posted in the OP.

 

A client contacted me in May and we shared a number of emails back and forth, and there were two issues. One, he was kinda far away and two—he went from being self-described as "easy" to being actually fairly demanding. He wanted me to do a lot of roleplay and acting which I just don't get into and don't think I do well anyway—so I was honest with him and said I didn't think we would be a good match. He was like "no problem, thank you for being honest with me."

 

A month later (i.e. present day), I get another set of emails that want me to go to the same place—and the emails have a vague similarity to something I've heard before. I start searching and bingo—it's him. Same description, same place, same likes/dislikes.

 

If this were you, what would YOU do? Clients—feel free to add your 2¢ worth.

 

I'll add .03. First, this is a client who really wants to see you, but who you don't want to see. Tell him he's "busted" and that you still don't think that you're the right escort for him. Second, on the "communication" issue, I keep hearing that it's "key". Well, how much is too much? How little is too little? What's the "right" kind or the "wrong" kind? Is this all some kind of grand guessing game? Third, am I obtuse or something? On the "reaching someone at a hotel" issue, when did a non-blocked cell phone stop being a requirement?

[down_to_business]

Okay—here's an update to one of the things I posted in the OP.

 

A client contacted me in May and we shared a number of emails back and forth, and there were two issues. One, he was kinda far away and two—he went from being self-described as "easy" to being actually fairly demanding. He wanted me to do a lot of roleplay and acting which I just don't get into and don't think I do well anyway—so I was honest with him and said I didn't think we would be a good match. He was like "no problem, thank you for being honest with me."

 

A month later (i.e. present day), I get another set of emails that want me to go to the same place—and the emails have a vague similarity to something I've heard before. I start searching and bingo—it's him. Same description, same place, same likes/dislikes.

 

If this were you, what would YOU do? Clients—feel free to add your 2¢ worth.

 

First I would want to know if you post adds under different names or different places or pulled your ad for a while and then reposted or changed your pictures as this person may simply have no idea he ever conatcted you before.

 

Then I would probably reply to him and say " My opinion that we would not be a good match has not changed in the past 30 days and is unlikely to change in the next 30 either. All the best, MAX"

[maxwellissmart]

First I would want to know if you post adds under different names or different places or pulled your ad for a while and then reposted or changed your pictures as this person may simply have no idea he ever conatcted you before.

 

Then I would probably reply to him and say " My opinion that we would not be a good match has not changed in the past 30 days and is unlikely to change in the next 30 either. All the best, MAX"

 

While that is completely understandable (and has happened), this guy contacted me only a month ago. This is one of the reasons why I stress to clients who do take the time to read the board: don't engage in this kind of behavior. It's annoying and makes you look like a flake.

[Steven_Draker]

I tell them to FUCK OFF

 

I don't think I ever ever used that phase with anyone, unless it's a very close friend and meant sarcastically with a big grin on my face.

 

A brief reply without having to explain "how" and "why" seems more appropriate. You don't need to alienate people like that. Just my opinion.

[BostonPhil]

I've got a new don't:

Don't think that I am not going to notice you trying to sneak in a booty bump while you're down there doin' poppers and eating my ass...

 

c'mon, REALLY?

[rvwnsd]

Okay—here's an update to one of the things I posted in the OP.

 

A client contacted me in May and we shared a number of emails back and forth, and there were two issues. One, he was kinda far away and two—he went from being self-described as "easy" to being actually fairly demanding. He wanted me to do a lot of roleplay and acting which I just don't get into and don't think I do well anyway—so I was honest with him and said I didn't think we would be a good match. He was like "no problem, thank you for being honest with me."

 

A month later (i.e. present day), I get another set of emails that want me to go to the same place—and the emails have a vague similarity to something I've heard before. I start searching and bingo—it's him. Same description, same place, same likes/dislikes.

 

If this were you, what would YOU do? Clients—feel free to add your 2¢ worth.

 

I would remind him we had e-mailed in May, inform him that I still did not think we were a match, and politely ask him to refrain from contacting me again.

[maxwellissmart]

I would... politely ask him to refrain from contacting me again.

 

Hmm... that never seems to work well—since they always just change their emails.

[SteveEscort]

1) Call from a nice hotel and leave me a message with your room number, but no name. (This happened last night, from the same person—twice.) It's great that you're in room 313. But you won't get called back because the switchboard won't transfer me to you and I have no other way to contact you. And you'll think I'm a dick for not calling you back. Another version of this is to call and use a different name from what you used before, so that I have no way of knowing who you are to call you back at your unlisted number.

 

 

2) Pay first. This makes you look like 1) a cop, 2) a fool, or 3) an amateur. Do this and watch me go from friendly and outgoing to cautious and suddenly needing to go back to my car because I... forgot... something.

 

Excellent post, I would have replied earlier but I have been sunning myself in Bodrum, Turkey.

 

I get the switchboard problem too but I have never ever been turned away. Sometimes, if you sound professional or they're busy they'll just transfer you across, if they don't and need a surname I will say, "I have no idea, I think its said he was called Steve and he was in room 313, but he left a message but just call his room and tell him Steve is calling and he can decide himself if he wants to take the call or not". Every single time the call has been place, I've never been turned away. He could have phoned for a table reservation at a restaurant or anything, they don't know what the call is about.

 

I prefer them to pay first if I have never seen them before. I never ask regular clients for money up front however there's no way I am doing 3 hours at a hotel to find out he didn't have the correct fee when he's a new client. I have been stung too many times. Cops, whether they hand the money over up front or not rarely want their cock sucked in a sting operation.

[BostonPhil]

Welcome back Steve!

[maxwellissmart]

Welcome back Steve!

 

Steve disappears into the woods to go on sabbaticals with truckers and the naughty folk from the UK. I envy him greatly.

[orbital sander]

I've got a new don't:

Don't think that I am not going to notice you trying to sneak in a booty bump while you're down there doin' poppers and eating my ass...

 

c'mon, REALLY?

 

I am a bit naive here, but I must ask, What is a "booty bump"? My mind is running amok...

[Kevin Slater]

I am a bit naive here, but I must ask, What is a "booty bump"? My mind is running amok...

 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=booty%20bump

 

Kevin Slater

[SteveEscort]

Steve disappears into the woods to go on sabbaticals with truckers and the naughty folk from the UK. I envy him greatly.

 

No I went with my cousin to visit my best friend who lives there lol and I even got chatted up by a rather cute Turkish guy from Istanbul who wanted me to be his sugar daddy. Honey it doesn't work like that, I am the one wanting to find a sugar daddy and I went there for a rest from sex lol

[Guest MajorTomp]

Client's Advice to Escorts -

 

I actually wrote this letter several months ago after a bad hire. I got to thinking about all the things that I've put up with as a client. I never posted it but after reading this thread, it brought back the thoughts that there are things that both escort and client can learn from each other. Hope you all take this with the humor with which it was intended.

 

 

Dear Escorts,

 

I've been seeing you guys for almost a year now and have made some great friends, had some incredible sex and continue to be flabbergasted as to some of the boners (and not the good kind) you make. *So, I've decided to write to you all so that you can benefit from or laugh at some of the mistakes of your associates. *Now I'm not talking new or inexperienced escorts here - I hire well reviewed or personally recommended guys. *So my expectations are that you are the pros of the pros!

 

First and foremost, don't you get the concept that I am hiring you for the total experience? - in-call or out-call, it matters not - it's about mood, atmosphere, fantasy and passion. When I'm entertaining you for an out-call appointment, I try to make your stay with me as pleasant as possible. *I always have the hotel provide additional towels and an extra robe if available. *I stock some bottled water, perhaps a bottle of wine and some light snack. *If we've been together before, I try to have something you like available, be it chocolate, a specific wine or a particular soft drink. *I set the mood with dimmed lighting, sometimes votive candles and soft music. *Any supplies we might need are readily available and conveniently located.

 

When you are entertaining me in your space, it would be nice to have you pay some attention to the atmosphere. *In only one case have you gone to the same level of hospitality for me, that I go to for you. *So far, I've been asked to help make the bed as the sheets were still in the dryer, stood around while you set up the massage table in your room, waited awkwardly while you dimmed lights, closed the curtains or lit the candles. *Rarely, am I offered a water or (gasp) a glass of wine. *I've been subjected to mattresses on the floor, dirty bathrooms, and cats and dogs jumping on the bed. *Now I love all animals, but not during our time together. *A nice introduction and then off to another room or kennel for them would be tres appropriate. *I've even had one of you get up during our "paid" time to go walk the dog! *Come on boys - who's paying the rent here. *While cleaning up, a warm wash cloth might be nice as opposed to a wad of paper towels. *And please, clean sheets - I don't know who you had in your bed last!

 

On the matter of personal hygiene - most of you do a great job. *Being a hygiene freak, I always shower IMMEDIATELY before you arrive or I come to you. *If that is not possible, I arrange with you, in advance, to shower immediately upon arrival and I am thoroughly scrubbed, teeth flossed and brushed, and freshly shaved. *I keep my manscaping up to date. *When I'm paying you by the hour, I expect you to be completely ready on my arrival or at least to indicate that you want to clean up and our time won't start until you're ready. *It would even be nice for you to invite me in to wash your back or . *. *. * You should smell and taste wonderful everywhere!

 

Here's a good one, if you advertise that you don't smoke, DON'T. *For those of us that have never smoked - we can taste it on your tongue whether you've recently brushed or not!

 

Don't offer me drugs, even poppers unless I've asked and don't come to the appointment high. *If you're a PNP guy or a 420 guy put it in your ad so I can not call you. *When I say D&D free, I mean it. *When you say it, I expect you to mean it too. *I've changed my wording to you recently to say "drug intolerant" instead of "drug free" - I want to make it clear that my expectation is that you be as clean as me during our time together.

 

At a minimum give me the time for which I am paying*- I like multiple rounds and I tell all my prospective hires that, yet one time you jumped up and started getting dressed after the first round, even though only half of our agreed time had passed. *You did come back to bed after I asked in a friendly way, "Where do you think you're going? *I'm not done with you yet!" *Surprise me sometime and give me something extra.

Don't tell me you're not into cum after I've blown a load on your stomach. *You're an escort for god sake - what do you think the business is about! *Take pride in what you do and be excellent at it! *Be honest with yourself and your clients about what you're in to and what you are (top, bottom, versatile, kink, mild, wild). *I'm an almost "exclusive top" but I'm trying to expand my experience. *I've hired some of you who advertise as tops or versatile tops and I’m clearly a better top than you are! *When you say, "there are lots of things two tops can do" - there aren't!* Top is not just a sexual preference it is a state of mind. *Someone is going to be in control of the encounter and unless you are willing to let me take the controlling role, things aren't going to work out too well.

 

Please have at least some recent pictures on your website. *In a recent hire, the pictures had to be over 10 years old. *It was clearly you, but you don't look like that anymore. *Try not to fudge on your age more than five years in your ad! *I know that not all clients are in the best of physical shape but I spend a lot of time pushing the years back. *I'm in the gym every damn day and I am fanatical about what I eat! *While I can't effect my age, I can work hard at keeping my body in the best shape possible. *Your body is the tool of your trade - don't you think that YOU*should spend more time in the gym than your client does? *I've seen several of you who have clearly let your routines lag!

 

To me, you guys are professional athletes - your playing career has a life limit. *You can extend that limit by taking great care of yourself physically and mentally but ultimately all professional athletic careers come to an end. *It can be a "going out at the top of your game" kind of end or a "train wreck" kind of end. *It's not just about age either, my best experiences have been with guys in their 30s and 40s - but they clearly make the effort to keep their "tool of the trade" in the best possible shape!

 

Speaking of the tool of your trade, if you can’t stay hard get a prescription for Viagra! *I want the fantasy that you are turned-on with what we are doing! *At almost 60, I can get and stay rock hard - you should be able to do it too, you can probably get away with a reduced dosage, get your doctor prescribe the 100's and cut them into fourths! *It's a small investment for a satisfied client.

 

All that being said, I love you guys! *You have become friends, confidants, counselors. *Of the near 20 experiences I've had there are only two that I would throw back. *I write this letter in the hope that many of you will recognize some of these faux pas and will work to eliminate them from your service. I want each and every time with you to be the most memorable it can be.

[jjkrkwood]

WOWZA Major Tom. All that "Spot On" insight in only 20 hires ???? I say you translate your post into little hand-out pamplets. Informative, eduactional and entertaining.

I salute You !

[tyro]

EXCELLENT comments.

[unsub2O17]

Tom, great comments. Nothing to add, question, or delete.