Erection Problems

[+ Shoreboy]

Not too long ago my PSA was 7 and my doctor told me that I should have "snips" taken from my prostate to see if there was any concernable cancer.h

I was scared shitless and immediately set up an appointment and had 14 snips taken from my prostate. Thank God there was nothing major found and I was put on a "wait and watch" schedule to see if my PSA went either up or down (I had thought down would be good but no it is also an indicator) and thus far a year later my PSA has remained (gratefully) the same.

 

However, after the snips I have had a problem with maintaining an erection but only when I am with someone else. Alone the boy does fine...with someone else it initially responds and then hibernates.

 

I spoke to my doctor about this and he gave me some samples of Viagra and Cialis and neither helped...although alone I felt like the Washington Monument between my legs!!

 

My doctor finally told me that it was more of a mental problem than a physical one....and told me to "relax and enjoy".

 

Well to me that has only compounded the problem since when in the throes of fun the last thing I want to start thinking is "okay relax, relax, relax" since it only causes me to wait for the Washington Monument to turn into a rubber band.

 

I am extremely grateful that there is no discernable cancer but I really would want to maintain an erection.

 

I know there is a lot of widsom on this board so any help would be appreciated

[BostonPhil]

First, I think your doctor is correct, it sounds like it is mostly a mental thing. Mostly people worry about what the other person is going to think if they aren't able to keep an erection. There are a lot of clients who are in a similar situation as yourself. Be honest with the person you are going to be with. It will give you the comfort of knowing that they already know and you will be less worried about it. Try to relax, if it doesn't happen the first time you see them, it will happen the next time. Try to see the same person more than once and build a little comfort with them so you can relax without having to think about it.

[+ Travis69]

It does sound like a mental thing but my question is did you have any problems, even the smallest ones, prior to the "snips" on your prostate? If it were purely a mental thing that would have surfaced prior to the surgery. For many the position of the body has an effect as you age. Laying flat, standing or sitting down will cause erection problems for some. Perhaps the position you are in while alone is better for an erection.

[doitb4ugo]

I sympathize with you, Shoreboy. I am at that age where prostate and erection problems will become a part of my life....I wanted to relate my situation so you may find some hope that this is temporary. When I was diagnosed HIV+, I was unable to get an erection wiht anyone I was with...like you I was fine by myself. Doctor suggested it was a mental thing....I even hired a number of escorts to get me over the hump...to no avail. About 6 months later, it came back....my only thought here was that I needed time to get comfortable with myself again and not be afraid of what had happened to me....I hope this is true for you a well....easy to tell you to relax and be patient...not so easy to do, but give it time.

Wishing you the best.

[SteveEscort]

It sounds more in you head than in your pants. I never have trouble getting an erection but I do have distinct problems keeping it hard when being bottom, if the client isn't attentive enough to keep it running. However I have no such problems when I am top.

 

I have met a number of clients who have said "Steve where has your hard one gone". Thing is, If I am expected to suck his dick for 20 minutes and he lies back and looks after himself, I find it hard to concentrate on my cock and his, if however, I am being fucked stupid and his hands are on my cock or balls then it stays stood to attention. It's a very mental block thing with me.

[EZEtoGRU]

Hey Shoreboy,

 

I wonder if I'm the only one who thinks that this is not only a mental problem. I'd rather think that it's a combination of the two.

 

If some snips were taken from your prostate, then the prostate is probably damaged. The damage may be really minor, but there is some damage. If that would be your problem, then the good news is that your body is capable of fixing most of the damage it suffers and I expect this problem to become less in the course of the time.

 

I'm with Anton on this one. I am not a medical doctor, but I am aware that the prostate is very fragile, and often when a procedure is done on it (even a minor one), there can be a negative impact in obtaining an erection. I also understand this can improve with time. So just relax and have fun. Others' advice to advise your partners in advance that there may be a problem seems like a very good idea.