Pffft

[maxwellissmart]

great! now i'm being judged on what dressing I use at the table. It's okay though...I can cope with this.

 

So Maxwell, if I use Catalina dressing or Ranch dressing..is that acceptable then?

 

 

gcursor

 

Alas, it can go either way. If you don't believe me, Mr. Rollseyes—try waiting tables sometime.

[tom1980]

I'm not clear exactly how this works. Do you always judge people based on the dressing they request, or does a dressing request help you confirm your suspicions about certain people? For example, could a clean cut, well dressed man order Thousand Island without being looked down on, but when a 350-pound guy wearing a wife beater or overalls with no undershirt orders Thousand Island, the waiter thinks to himself, "Ah ha! I knew he was a red neck!"

[maxwellissmart]

I'm not clear exactly how this works. Do you always judge people based on the dressing they request, or does a dressing request help you confirm your suspicions about certain people? For example, could a clean cut, well dressed man order Thousand Island without being looked down on, but when a 350-pound guy wearing a wife beater or overalls with no undershirt orders Thousand Island, the waiter thinks to himself, "Ah ha! I knew he was a red neck!"

 

I've gotten some excellent tips from rednecks. You can't prejudge from appearance. Dressing on the other hand...

[tom1980]

I've gotten some excellent tips from rednecks. You can't prejudge from appearance. Dressing on the other hand...

 

When I was a waiter (during college), I often got nice tips (>20%) from blue collar workers. I felt like those people could relate to working hard for little money and appreciated it when they saw a waiter working hard to provide good service. Some of the people who appeared to be more affluent gave good tips, but it was a lower percentage than the blue collar workers.

[unsub2O17]

I'm still smarting from the swipe at AOL. I got my start on AOL, and just look how well that turned out!! I must admit to being "naked" on the beef issue. Nothing on steak or hot dogs--just the good old, plain, medium beef. Oh, and what happens to the stodgy "oil and vinegar" people? Is it OK if they mix it themselves or the vinegar is balsamic and not wine, and the oil is light "virgin" olive oil?

[jjkrkwood]

I'm not clear exactly how this works. Do you always judge people based on the dressing they request, or does a dressing request help you confirm your suspicions about certain people? For example, could a clean cut, well dressed man order Thousand Island without being looked down on, but when a 350-pound guy wearing a wife beater or overalls with no undershirt orders Thousand Island, the waiter thinks to himself, "Ah ha! I knew he was a red neck!"

 

No silly, the waiter KNEW he was a redneck from his coon-skin cap ! Dressing was irrelevant.

[jjkrkwood]

I've gotten some excellent tips from rednecks. You can't prejudge from appearance. Dressing on the other hand...

 

Well I dont like being judged ! NO MORE salad for me.....

[maxwellissmart]

Well there was a comment on another thread about Peter Lugers, a 5+ star steakhouse which I have dined at (but didnt pay for), and a steak is about $100, and YES Max, I did put Ketsup on it, although it WAS Heinz and not Hunts....

 

I actually prefer most organics to either Heinz or Hunt's (one of the few instances where I agree that organic is actually better)—although if I had my druthers I would use packet ketchup, which is the tastiest of all.

 

But opening ketchup packets at a table isn't ladylike.

[maxwellissmart]

Well I dont like being judged ! NO MORE salad for me.....

 

Oh, but it doesn't stop there, my friend. Here's some more restaurant wisdom, gleaned from my decades of experience.

 

1) Smokers tip better.

2) Anyone who indicates during the meal that they are a good tipper is lying 95% of the time.

3) Teachers are unable to divide checks, even when they all ordered the same thing.

4) Anyone who has ever been nominated for a Dove Award is going to fuck you when it comes to the tip.

5) ^Except for Michael W. Smith, who is delightful.

6) Mobsters and anyone with a criminal past will hook you up.

7) If your table allows their kids to play with the condiments, you're screwed.

8) That table of bitchy, demanding fags you've waited on 974 times will pretend not to know you if they see you anywhere else.

[josephga]

If I eat out somewhere and somethings wrong with the food I won't say anything or send it back. I'm scared they might spit in the food or something. if the foods wrong I just won't eat there again

[maxwellissmart]

If I eat out somewhere and somethings wrong with the food I won't say anything or send it back. I'm scared they might spit in the food or something. if the foods wrong I just won't eat there again

 

I can honestly say I would never, ever do something like that to a guest. Mistakes happen all the time in a restaurant—on both sides. I absolutely hate when a guest is passive-aggressive about the whole thing and won't let you fix a problem. As a rule, gay clientele I have waited on tends to be notoriously unforgiving about the least little mistake.

[josephga]

i went out to dinner with gays in the past that like to show their ass over mistakes. I have this friend that manages a Hollywood tan she says the gay guys can be horrible. they come in wanting to hurry up get them in regardless of who else is waiting. cheap they never buy tanning lotions. if something happens and a booth doesn't work correctly they want tell them, they will run home email the owner and whine about it..

[gallahadesquire]

I have been promoted up the food chain. I buy my balsamic vinaigrette for less than 2 bucks a bottle. I didn't know I was hobnobbing with the uppercrust. hehehe....

 

Story tyme: in Tuscany a out five years ago, I bought several Balsamic vinegars. One was noted as Truly Exceptional ( at € 39, it should be something special!). After two years of Net searches, I finally got a purveyor of same, who is in Canada, and was willing to sell me a case, but I had to arrange Customs and pay in funds Canadian. He the went into cahoots with a Canadian gift shop, who took credit cards and all that jazz and then we t out of business. So it goes.

[maxwellissmart]

i went out to dinner with gays in the past that like to show their ass over mistakes. I have this friend that manages a Hollywood tan she says the gay guys can be horrible. they come in wanting to hurry up get them in regardless of who else is waiting. cheap they never buy tanning lotions. if something happens and a booth doesn't work correctly they want tell them, they will run home email the owner and whine about it..

 

What's funny is that in groups they can be so bad—but when they're in couples they have a tendency to be nicer (I guess it's because they want to impress their date with how nice and sweet and patient they are). Gay realtors (I know, it's redundant) for the most part are the minions of Satan. And gay doctors and lawyers—particularly in groups—can't be the minions because they're too far up Satan's ass to be effective at minioning. And lesbians tend to be very nice in groups. The best gays you can wait on are bartenders—and dare I say it, drag queens. The latter will be demanding, but they are highly entertaining and will tip you enormously if you flirt.

[gallahadesquire]

Ketchup on a steak can be forgiven but please tell me that you draw the line at putting ketchup (Heinz or Hunts) on a hot dog? It is a sin to do that as was pointed out in another thread a few weeks ago.

 

What about sauerkraut?

[maxwellissmart]

What about sauerkraut?

 

Or barbecue sauce?

[maxwellissmart]

Story tyme: in Tuscany a out five years ago, I bought several Balsamic vinegars. One was noted as Truly Exceptional ( at € 39, it should be something special!). After two years of Net searches, I finally got a purveyor of same, who is in Canada, and was willing to sell me a case, but I had to arrange Customs and pay in funds Canadian. He the went into cahoots with a Canadian gift shop, who took credit cards and all that jazz and then we t out of business. So it goes.

 

If I had the selection between a glass of a sublime Pinot Noir and a squeeze bottle of some really tasty balsamic glaze—I would be hard pressed to choose. I worked at a restaurant once where the owner had a barrel of the stuff—and it was so thick and concentrated, like caramel.

[jgoo]

What about sauerkraut?

 

Here is the official video of hot dog etiquette from the National Hot Dog and Sausage Council to address the proper dos and don'ts:

 

[video=youtube;T69HDek6a3k]

[maxwellissmart]

Here is the official video of hot dog etiquette from the National Hot Dog and Sausage Council to address the proper dos and don'ts:

 

[video=youtube;T69HDek6a3k]

 

I would eat an entire crock-pot of those little cocktail wieners right now.

[gallahadesquire]

Who's the cutie in the video? Cornfed Midwestern WOOF!

[maxwellissmart]

Who's the cutie in the video? Cornfed Midwestern WOOF!

 

I don't know—he looks like he would sign his emails with "Have a Blessed Day."

[Lohengrin1979]

I don't know—he looks like he would sign his emails with "Have a Blessed Day."

 

I wouldn't care at all as long as he "blessed" my day.

[gallahadesquire]

In the clip, he slowly undresses - first the tie, then the shirt. Good build! Pity he leaves the t-shirt on.

[SteveEscort]

. Plus his contact domain was AOL, which over the past couple of years has proven to be the equivalent of Thousand Island Dressing.

 

Oh dear you mean "Family friendly heterosexual republican born again no sex please we're repressed and drink cocoa to wind down on an evening AOL"

[maxwellissmart]

Oh dear you mean "Family friendly heterosexual republican born again no sex please we're repressed and drink cocoa to wind down on an evening AOL"

 

Actually it's more like "30-plus initial contacts through AOL and only one has ever panned out to being an actual client AOL."