Would An Escort Say, "Whoa, That's Too Much Work For Me"? LOL!

[GuntherCory]

Dear Alex,

 

As Jerry Blank in "Strangers with candy" used to scream:

 

"I'VE GOT SOMETHIN' TO SAY!"

 

I am looking at this from a very different perspective. You have been told that there are escorts who will be fine with your situation, real Pros who will be okay with taking it slowly and at your pace, escorts who have patience with first timers and inexperienced people.

 

I say forget those escorts. While they may give you a good service, this is not what you are looking for.

 

There are many (OK, maybe not many but a few) very good escorts for whom this would be a dreamed opportunity. They are not going to have patience with your limitations, They are not going to sit there biting their nails waiting for you to "get it" and finally be able to receive a good fuck; instead they are going to be excited and honoured by the fun opportunity of going through the process of learning your body with you.

 

We live for this shit! =)

 

It has always been my contention in this forum that there are two main types of escorts. (Well, there are many types, but I just want to talk about two.)

 

One is an escort, the real pro, the dream fuck, a man of a certain beauty and desirability, with a certain skill set and a good attitude who will give you a fantastic fuck. They will pretty much be able to work with most kind of clients and will adapt their skill set to the client's needs. They are great, warm, passionate and fun, and when what you need is a superb fuck, they are perfect for this job.

 

The other type is what I like to call the Intimacy therapist, the sexual healer. Call it what you please. This kind of escort loves using his body, his skill set, his experience and his awareness of his body and psyche to help you become more comfortable with your own. This kind of escort will give you a good fuck if that is what you are looking for, but he will also be able to help you learn how to navigate your own body, teach you healthy ways to explore your sexuality. For escorts like this a situation like yours is not something to be patient about; an escort like this will revel at the chance to give you a safe, loving and caring environment in which you can feel free to blossom. An escort like this has a lot of experience, tools and creativity to be able to make it easy, relaxed and fun for both of you, and what is more important, they have the sensitivity and the desire to do so.

 

There is nothing more fulfilling than seeing that flicker in the face of our clients, that expression that says "Oh, God, now I get it! This is actually fun!".

 

You should not come to them saying "Sorry, I am inexperienced, and can you please accommodate me?". Instead think of it more like "I have the adventure of my sexuality ahead of me and I want to share a few hours of this adventure with you. Would you be able to guide me through this?" (Okay, perhaps don't write this literally -it could sound a little intense, but you must at all times remember that you are sharing something wonderful with him. His whole practice as an escort is spent hoping that he will be able to help someone like you become a confident, relaxed, self-assured, able sexual being.) He is in this profession hoping that he will have a chance to help you realize how exquisite, unique and important you are.

 

One word of caution, though: make sure you remember that these talented men are teachers, guides, not lovers. You may experience powerful emotions which may make it easy to lose focus of the purpose they have in your life. Put yourself in their hands and remember that you are not there to be fulfilled, but to learn how to take the reins of your sexuality in your own hands. Dependance is just another face of disability. You should come to them with the intention of becoming a free, powerful sexual being.

 

It's school, it's not marriage. =)

 

Clearly you are on your way when it comes to research; you have already mentioned a few of the best sexual healers there are, so I have nothing else to say except congratulations for your recovery, congratulations for your big balls, having the bravery of facing life and grabbing the bull by the horns. I wish you a fulfilling, exciting and fun journey into yourself.

 

Juan, your message was wonderful; warm, amusing, insightful and even a real turn on! An escort who "lives for this shit" would be a great find. Someone who'd take my situation as a fun, exciting challenge would be a dream come true!

 

I'm not going to fall in love with anyone, nor expect them to fulfill me emotionally, per se, although I do want someone with whom I could be friendly and affectionate. I really do believe that, without falling in love with or stalking some poor, terrorized escort, I should be able to find a balance between good, satisfying sex and a friendly camaraderie between the escort and me. Now, if the rentboy would also find it an HONOR and exciting to explore my body with me...WELL! All the better! Bring him on!!!

[Juan Vancouver]

I'm not going to fall in love with anyone, nor expect them to fulfill me emotionally, per se, although I do want someone with whom I could be friendly and affectionate. I really do believe that, without falling in love with or stalking some poor, terrorized escort, I should be able to find a balance between good, satisfying sex and a friendly camaraderie between the escort and me.

 

It sounds to me as if you have the perfect mindset to have the time of your life! Of course it is important to have true closeness, real intimacy in order for you to be able to open up fully. (Excuse my french.) =) Believe me, this kind of escort will meet you half way.

 

An escort who "lives for this shit" would be a great find. Someone who'd take my situation as a fun, exciting challenge would be a dream come true! If the rentboy would also find it an HONOR and exciting to explore my body with me...WELL! All the better! Bring him on!!!

 

Well, as fate would have it you are in the perfect place to find such an escort, and as a matter of fact you have already found a few! I am excited for you and I hope that you will keep us somewhat in the loop, sharing with us your adventures and progress.

 

I send you a tight hug and my best (and dirtiest) wishes!

[GuntherCory]

It sounds to me as if you have the perfect mindset to have the time of your life! Of course it is important to have true closeness, real intimacy in order for you to be able to open up fully. (Excuse my french.) =) Believe me, this kind of escort will meet you half way.

 

 

 

Well, as fate would have it you are in the perfect place to find such an escort, and as a matter of fact you have already found a few! I am excited for you and I hope that you will keep us somewhat in the loop, sharing with us your adventures and progress.

 

I send you a tight hug and my best (and dirtiest) wishes!

 

 

I've checked out your rentboy ad, and a "tight hug" would not be turned down!

 

As the old saying goes, "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"

 

(I did NOT just write that, LOL!!!)

[Juan Vancouver]

"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"

 

I would most definitely hold it against you!

 

I would hold it against you, I would rub it on you, I would slide it all over your own body... I would put it in and take it out again just for fun!

 

(And thank you, by the way. I am almost blushing.)

 

You are fun. You'll be fine. =)

 

Big hug, stud!

[Cal28]

Sorry to interrupt you two, but if the stars are aligned, I hope and predict that someday soon, we'll be reading another glowing review of Juan Vancouver, written by none other than Alex Matthews. Have fun, guys!

[rvwnsd]

There are probably some escorts who would answer "yes" to the question you posed. There also are many who would welcome the opportunity to re-introduce you to the joys of man-on-man sex. My suggestions are as follows:

 

1) Review ads in your area/the area to which you are willing to travel: Take note of those who strike your fancy.

2) Re-read the noted ad: Pay attention to the way the ads present the escort. Flag those that depict someone you would like to meet and play with

3) Check their reviews: If they have favorable reviews and they listen to their clients and make their clients' needs their top priority, put them on your list. If they do not have reviews, but you are still interested put them on your list, too.

4) Contact the guys on your list: Explain your situation, inform them of what you would like to do during your session, and ask if they can accommodate.

5) Evaluate the replies: If a guy expresses genuine interest via a well-crafted reply, he is probably being sincere. If he says "yeah," well, you might want to question his responsiveness to your needs and wants.

6) Go with your gut, not with the head of your cock: While it is important you find him sexually attractive, if your inner voice tells you to take a pass or consider the guy for a future date when you have more recent experience, listen. If both your inner voice and the head of your cock agree you should hire a guy, you probably should.

 

At the end of the day, it is all about communication, communication, and communication. Unless his name is Claire Voyant (and if it is, you have to ask yourself whether you want to hook up with a guy named Claire) he won't know what you need/want unless you tell him. I hope you find this advice to be useful. Let us know how your encounter turns out.

 

Best of luck with your search!

[GuntherCory]

I would most definitely hold it against you!

 

I would hold it against you, I would rub it on you, I would slide it all over your own body... I would put it in and take it out again just for fun!

 

You may be happy to know that I am having a special this week: all you can rub, for a limited-time only, $4.99!*

 

* This offer void where prohibited by law.

 

(Pffft! Sorry, I amuse MYSELF anyway!)

 

[GuntherCory]

Sorry to interrupt you two, but if the stars are aligned, I hope and predict that someday soon, we'll be reading another glowing review of Juan Vancouver, written by none other than Alex Matthews. Have fun, guys!

 

I can already give Juan a glowing review; he's been a sweetheart, as have so many kind posters in this thread.

 

I was hesitant about starting this topic, and putting myself "out there", but I'm so glad I did.

 

Daddy has some great members in this forum.

[GuntherCory]

There are probably some escorts who would answer "yes" to the question you posed. There also are many who would welcome the opportunity to re-introduce you to the joys of man-on-man sex. My suggestions are as follows:

 

1) Review ads in your area/the area to which you are willing to travel: Take note of those who strike your fancy.

2) Re-read the noted ad: Pay attention to the way the ads present the escort. Flag those that depict someone you would like to meet and play with

3) Check their reviews: If they have favorable reviews and they listen to their clients and make their clients' needs their top priority, put them on your list. If they do not have reviews, but you are still interested put them on your list, too.

4) Contact the guys on your list: Explain your situation, inform them of what you would like to do during your session, and ask if they can accommodate.

5) Evaluate the replies: If a guy expresses genuine interest via a well-crafted reply, he is probably being sincere. If he says "yeah," well, you might want to question his responsiveness to your needs and wants.

6) Go with your gut, not with the head of your cock: While it is important you find him sexually attractive, if your inner voice tells you to take a pass or consider the guy for a future date when you have more recent experience, listen. If both your inner voice and the head of your cock agree you should hire a guy, you probably should.

 

At the end of the day, it is all about communication, communication, and communication. Unless his name is Claire Voyant (and if it is, you have to ask yourself whether you want to hook up with a guy named Claire) he won't know what you need/want unless you tell him. I hope you find this advice to be useful. Let us know how your encounter turns out.

 

Best of luck with your search!

 

Hey, Rvwnsd. Your list of how to proceed is excellent. I've been doing everything on it, and will continue to do so. As I've said before, the only real "problem" I have is that there are SO many guys I find attractive, it's hard to narrow down the field. The reviews are very telling, however, and I'd definitely cross some choices off my potential short list, if their reviews were uniformly negative. I freely acknowledge that everyone can have a bad day, and that even the best escorts can't make everyone happy. Plus it wouldn't surprise me at all if some petulant clients wrote bad reviews out of spite, but if there's a plethora of dreadful reviews, no matter how hot I found an escort, I'd just think, "...next!"

[Lookin]

ROFTLMAO, Lookin!

 

Too true.

 

Are you suggesting I stop thinking and simply dive in?

Exactly!

 

Seems to me that if you find a guy who attracts you, and who has a positive energy, you're very likely to have a good time. Maybe instead of looking for the one 'perfect' escort, find two or three whom you'd like to spend an hour with. And that's really the only thing you're committing to.

 

If it goes beyond that, it's your call.

http://www.best-of-web.com/computer/clipart_computer/man_on_phone.gif

PS: For those who have expressed an interest in my avatar, he's Doobie-wan Kenobi, Obi-wan's older brother and a friend since high school. http://www.maleescortreview.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/rolleyes.gif

[Steven_Draker]

you have to ask yourself whether you want to hook up with a guy named Claire

 

http://localism.com/image_store/uploads/7/3/0/5/6/ar123454569265037.jpg

[unsub2O17]

Alex, a "Diet 7-Up"?? A real man has a Diet Coke or at the very least a Diet Pepsi!

[GuntherCory]

Exactly!

 

Seems to me that if you find a guy who attracts you, and who has a positive energy, you're very likely to have a good time. Maybe instead of looking for the one 'perfect' escort, find two or three whom you'd like to spend an hour with. And that's really the only thing you're committing to.

 

If it goes beyond that, it's your call.

 

 

Two or three...at the same time? Or individually? You're making my perverted mind dance with all sorts of nasty scenarios!

[GuntherCory]

Alex, a "Diet 7-Up"?? A real man has a Diet Coke or at the very least a Diet Pepsi!

 

Hey, I've been known to go to a bar and order...milk!

 

Diet 7 Up is rather manly in comparison, no?

[leigh.bess.toad]

Alex -- you've gotten some great answers, from experienced clients and some wonderful escorts as well. I think you are well on your way.

 

Most of the top guys here would have no problem with anything you've laid out here. You've been 7 years. For many guys here, it's been longer or even their very first man-to-man experience. For me, it was probably 25 years. And like you, I was scared beyond belief. I was a slightly out of shape, married guy who has physical limitations due to 2 artificial hips. But I remember on my second hire, with one of the true pros, Romann. It was an overnight and the thing I told him what I wanted almost more than anything from that encounter is waking up next to him in the morning and cuddling. I had missed that so much. And it was amazing (okay, the sex was great too).

 

Some of the escorts here have worked with many first-timers and are great at it. Some are natural teachers. Some are almost borne healers. Finding guys who will match what you are looking for isn't easy but it certainly is very possible.

 

And helping newbies, or nearly newbies such as yourself, is one of the things the guys on this board seem to do best. They take a certain pride in helping usher someone into our "little hobby".

 

You say you are on the east coast but not where. Some of your choices may be dictate who you might see. If you are near or can travel to a major city (NY or Washington seem to get the most touring guys), your choices open up a lot. I'm in Richmond but have only hired 3 guys here, all touring, and normally because they just stop to see me. Usually I drive to DC. For some reason, DC seems to be a place that many/most of the top escorts hit during the year.

 

One suggestion would be to keep an eye on the forum for Escort Travels to see if someone who might interest you is traveling near you. The other suggestion, as has been made before, is that make sure you see a very well reviewed guy. And bouncing off the forum members here wouldn't be a bad idea either.

 

My escorts have helped me in ways I can't even begin to imagine. With patience, guidance, support, and some occasionally needed tough love, they have taken a deeply closeted married man to an out and proud gay man who has fallen in love with the most amazing man. Because of that, my hiring days are now at an end (well never say never), because I want to be monogamous with him. Without them, I never would have had the courage or self-confidence to even try for a relationship. I owe much of that to them as well. But these men have become my friends as well as my escorts and we will be in touch for many years to come. And if I can convince my bf/partner to ever get married, I could end up with the best looking groomsmen in the history of a wedding.

 

Just be upfront with them, without overwhelming them. I know initially I was the client from hell and in retrospect I'm a bit ashamed I consumed so much of their time. But they were gracious and understanding and put me at ease. You will be able to find guys like that. And you can be amazed at what you can get out of that relationship.

 

Good luck and keep us informed.

[unsub2O17]

I feel like a broken record today, but, Alex, I want to second what Leigh said. I, too, live a relatively short drive from a major urban area that has a good assortment of its own escorts as well as many great visiting ones. The local area is quite limited, but driving a few hours for a major pay off is a good deal.

[GuntherCory]

Alex -- you've gotten some great answers, from experienced clients and some wonderful escorts as well. I think you are well on your way.

 

Most of the top guys here would have no problem with anything you've laid out here. You've been 7 years. For many guys here, it's been longer or even their very first man-to-man experience. For me, it was probably 25 years. And like you, I was scared beyond belief. I was a slightly out of shape, married guy who has physical limitations due to 2 artificial hips. But I remember on my second hire, with one of the true pros, Romann. It was an overnight and the thing I told him what I wanted almost more than anything from that encounter is waking up next to him in the morning and cuddling. I had missed that so much. And it was amazing (okay, the sex was great too).

 

Some of the escorts here have worked with many first-timers and are great at it. Some are natural teachers. Some are almost borne healers. Finding guys who will match what you are looking for isn't easy but it certainly is very possible.

 

And helping newbies, or nearly newbies such as yourself, is one of the things the guys on this board seem to do best. They take a certain pride in helping usher someone into our "little hobby".

 

You say you are on the east coast but not where. Some of your choices may be dictate who you might see. If you are near or can travel to a major city (NY or Washington seem to get the most touring guys), your choices open up a lot. I'm in Richmond but have only hired 3 guys here, all touring, and normally because they just stop to see me. Usually I drive to DC. For some reason, DC seems to be a place that many/most of the top escorts hit during the year.

 

One suggestion would be to keep an eye on the forum for Escort Travels to see if someone who might interest you is traveling near you. The other suggestion, as has been made before, is that make sure you see a very well reviewed guy. And bouncing off the forum members here wouldn't be a bad idea either.

 

My escorts have helped me in ways I can't even begin to imagine. With patience, guidance, support, and some occasionally needed tough love, they have taken a deeply closeted married man to an out and proud gay man who has fallen in love with the most amazing man. Because of that, my hiring days are now at an end (well never say never), because I want to be monogamous with him. Without them, I never would have had the courage or self-confidence to even try for a relationship. I owe much of that to them as well. But these men have become my friends as well as my escorts and we will be in touch for many years to come. And if I can convince my bf/partner to ever get married, I could end up with the best looking groomsmen in the history of a wedding.

 

Just be upfront with them, without overwhelming them. I know initially I was the client from hell and in retrospect I'm a bit ashamed I consumed so much of their time. But they were gracious and understanding and put me at ease. You will be able to find guys like that. And you can be amazed at what you can get out of that relationship.

 

Good luck and keep us informed.

 

It's great to hear that your journey has been a successful one, from a deeply closeted person, to an out an proud gay man who's found love. And you've even gotten cuddles, to boot! Good for you!

[GuntherCory]

I feel like a broken record today, but, Alex, I want to second what Leigh said. I, too, live a relatively short drive from a major urban area that has a good assortment of its own escorts as well as many great visiting ones. The local area is quite limited, but driving a few hours for a major pay off is a good deal.

 

I agree, a trip to "bountiful", as it were; a trip to a major escort spot is a great idea, and certainly not out of the question.

[rvwnsd]

Hey, Rvwnsd. Your list of how to proceed is excellent. I've been doing everything on it, and will continue to do so. As I've said before, the only real "problem" I have is that there are SO many guys I find attractive, it's hard to narrow down the field. The reviews are very telling, however, and I'd definitely cross some choices off my potential short list, if their reviews were uniformly negative. I freely acknowledge that everyone can have a bad day, and that even the best escorts can't make everyone happy. Plus it wouldn't surprise me at all if some petulant clients wrote bad reviews out of spite, but if there's a plethora of dreadful reviews, no matter how hot I found an escort, I'd just think, "...next!"

 

 

Thank you for the compliment. I'm glad the suggestions help. Have you found that special someone yet?

 

http://localism.com/image_store/uploads/7/3/0/5/6/ar123454569265037.jpg

 

Love the pic, Steven.