re: Dealing with the Inexperienced, Shy Client

[bcohen7719]

Suppose you have an inexperienced, shy client. You do your best to scope his personality in advance by telephone. But in person, he might not be able to verbalize that well. Do you, yourself, utilize non-verbal clues, or else just take the initiative using best professional judgement?

 

BC

[Juan Vancouver]

Hey BC,

 

I think this scenario is more common than you may think. Sometimes, for whatever reason, clients have trouble communicating verbally about what they like, sometimes they don't have trouble saying what they think that they want but I believe sexuality and intimacy are never that simple; often we believe we are looking for something very specific when in truth we are yearning for something entirely different. Sometimes we are aware of what we are truly yearning and we hope our lover will guess and provide for it, sometimes we simply have no clue and are incredibly surprised when it happens and we get that delicious sensation of complete fulfillment.

 

I think that both during our escorting experiences and during life, we all could benefit from paying attention to all the information our partner is giving us: all that he is saying, all that he is not saying, all the body language, all the sounds that he emits, the smells, the information transmitted through the skin. Our bodies are constantly communicating perfectly true information and if we learn to read this information it will make our relationships more fulfilling, more fun, more intimate.

 

Lastly, even if I just said that ideally your escort should be able to understand what your body is saying, I would really recommend to try to make a point of communicating as openly as possible. I know that sometimes it is very difficult to say things that we have been told all our lives that are not good, healthy or moral, but the more you practice the easier they will come to the tongue. Your needs need to be expressed as openly as possible because you deserve this satisfaction and in life it really is up to you to make sure they get fulfilled.

 

During a session with a good escort it is okay to trust that he will be able to guess and guide you, but once you are out in the street, in real life, it is up to you to make sure that you get what you need.

 

Here's to asking!

[doitb4ugo]

I started out as an inexperienced, shy client. My first few sessions were not very good for me (and from some pretty well reviewed escorts).I realized all along that the fault was my own because I was not capable of articulating what I wanted...Damned if I knew what I wanted. Being shy and inexperienced certainly is a bad combination. When asked what i hoped to get out of the sessions, I had no answer to give...I clearly did not know....A very wise escort (Sean Knight) gave me the best advice of my sexual career.He said to stop thinking of a session as a group of specific actions and start asking yourself not what you want to do but how do you want to feel. It took me over a month of mulling this over before it hit me that I needed sessions where the partner was very dominant and could control and manage all the activities....I wanted to feel dominated....This revelation led to a very good number of more sucessful sessions where I could explore different things but always come away with an inner satisfaction that was the core of having sex with the guy....

 

Sorry to ramble....hope this helps.....

[Juan Vancouver]

I started out as an inexperienced, shy client. My first few sessions were not very good for me (and from some pretty well reviewed escorts).I realized all along that the fault was my own because I was not capable of articulating what I wanted...Damned if I knew what I wanted. Being shy and inexperienced certainly is a bad combination. When asked what i hoped to get out of the sessions, I had no answer to give...I clearly did not know....A very wise escort (Sean Knight) gave me the best advice of my sexual career.He said to stop thinking of a session as a group of specific actions and start asking yourself not what you want to do but how do you want to feel. It took me over a month of mulling this over before it hit me that I needed sessions where the partner was very dominant and could control and manage all the activities....I wanted to feel dominated....This revelation led to a very good number of more sucessful sessions where I could explore different things but always come away with an inner satisfaction that was the core of having sex with the guy....

 

Sorry to ramble....hope this helps.....

 

Nice!

 

It helped me. Thank you.

[leigh.bess.toad]

Hey BC,

 

I think this scenario is more common than you may think. Sometimes, for whatever reason, clients have trouble communicating verbally about what they like, sometimes they don't have trouble saying what they think that they want but I believe sexuality and intimacy are never that simple; often we believe we are looking for something very specific when in truth we are yearning for something entirely different. Sometimes we are aware of what we are truly yearning and we hope our lover will guess and provide for it, sometimes we simply have no clue and are incredibly surprised when it happens and we get that delicious sensation of complete fulfillment.

 

I think that both during our escorting experiences and during life, we all could benefit from paying attention to all the information our partner is giving us: all that he is saying, all that he is not saying, all the body language, all the sounds that he emits, the smells, the information transmitted through the skin. Our bodies are constantly communicating perfectly true information and if we learn to read this information it will make our relationships more fulfilling, more fun, more intimate.

 

Lastly, even if I just said that ideally your escort should be able to understand what your body is saying, I would really recommend to try to make a point of communicating as openly as possible. I know that sometimes it is very difficult to say things that we have been told all our lives that are not good, healthy or moral, but the more you practice the easier they will come to the tongue. Your needs need to be expressed as openly as possible because you deserve this satisfaction and in life it really is up to you to make sure they get fulfilled.

 

During a session with a good escort it is okay to trust that he will be able to guess and guide you, but once you are out in the street, in real life, it is up to you to make sure that you get what you need.

 

Here's to asking!

 

Juan -- that is so well said. I've often found that the best experiences I have with an escort, with the truly great ones, is that they give me what I really need, not what I want. They are often two entirely separate and sometimes even mutually exclusive, concepts. When what I need and what I want are the same thing, it's a lot easier, I'm sure. But it's at those times when my inexperience, my naivete, won't let me verbalize what I need is when some of the truly great guys I've been with can lead me to where I want and need to go. Even if I don't know it myself.

[Steven_Draker]

we all could benefit from paying attention to all the information our partner is giving us ... all the sounds that he emits, the smells ...

 

Juan, I'm not sure what sounds and smells are you talking about ...?

[Lookin]

. . . I'm not sure what sounds and smells are you talking about ...? [/color]

http://www.funfacts.com.au/images/farting.gif

The Shy Inexperienced Client seems eager to get started.