Escorts that don't contact you

[+ purplekow]

This is a question partnered to the question regarding escorts that contact clients unasked. I have recently tried to contact several escorts with whom i had multiple sessions in the past. I had not contacted them for more than a year but they live outside my area and I did not see any notice of a visit to my city. In all three cases, we had done several overnights, had exchanged e mails of a more personal nature and had spoken on the phone outside of business. These escorts still have ads up but i have not received a response to inquiries of a general as well as professional nature. I have given up but I am confused as to the change in the demeanor. I do not think i have offended them in any way. No bounced checks. I suppose there are many explanations for the lack of response but getting a response from these guys had never been an issue. Comments?

[Guest Spanker01]

You say "several" in your post. I would suspect the reasons are many and manifold, different for each excort involved. Retirement, family matters, health matters, not traveling right now, new daytime job, etc....... Who knows.

 

Have you tried calling?

 

Spanker

[+ purplekow]

Have sent 2 or three how are things going e mails to each over a few months, nothing stalkerish. All three have ads up. Certainly there are many possible explanations, was asking if others had this kind of experience in which an escort with whom you have had a good relationship over several overnight encounters suddenly drops you off his radar. i am not sulking over this just thought it was a logical companion to the question of escorts who contact you without your asking.

[fanman]

Have sent 2 or three how are things going e mails to each over a few months, nothing stalkerish. All three have ads up. Certainly there are many possible explanations, was asking if others had this kind of experience in which an escort with whom you have had a good relationship over several overnight encounters suddenly drops you off his radar. i am not sulking over this just thought it was a logical companion to the question of escorts who contact you without your asking.

 

I've definitely had some guys who've stopped responding. Never knew why, but almost all previous guys I've met and then later re-contacted have responded back.

[best hotel]

hey PK....i totally understand....that has happened to me with two of my favorite out-of-town guys....it hurts

[JT Brooklyn]

Hey PK..The situation is a little strange in that the "Working Guys" do know who you are? It could be coincidental no replies yet?

 

They do have ADS Up so I'm guessing it's not a "Retirement" situation where getting an answer back most times does not happen!

 

Not much else you can do at this point in time really?

[Guest Merlin]

PK, if these are as you suggest "how are things going" emails, rather than definite proposals for a time and place, that is the problem. While you may think they have become friends etc., you are to them a potential client. They don't have the time or inclination to carry on a purely personal correspondence.

[EZEtoGRU]

PK, if these are as you suggest "how are things going" emails, rather than definite proposals for a time and place, that is the problem. While you may think they have become friends etc., you are to them a potential client. They don't have the time or inclination to carry on a purely personal correspondence.

 

I agree with Merlin. The escorts in question may not be interested in exchanging general chitchat emails with you. Many escorts really only want communications with clients when it relates to business.

[Decatur Guy]

That sounds like good advice from Merlin2.

 

I have a "three strikes" rule on e-mails. If I e-mail someone three times (say within a month to six weeks) and don't hear back, I'll assume at that stage that person does not want to hear from me.

 

I like to give people a chance -- maybe they deleted it by accident, maybe the mail went to spam, etc.

 

I've even gone as far as to say I want to get back in touch, but I also don't want to be a pest and not realize it, so I'm removing you from contact list unless you reply back and let me know you'd like to stay in contact.

 

I usually do those things with FBs, but I think the same generally apply to escorts too.

[seeker630]

PK, if these are as you suggest "how are things going" emails, rather than definite proposals for a time and place, that is the problem. While you may think they have become friends etc., you are to them a potential client. They don't have the time or inclination to carry on a purely personal correspondence.

 

If they are out-of-town and have no imminent plans to return to your area, that might also make them disinclined to respond. I had one traveling guy ignore several emails from me (requesting information), but he did contact me when he made definite plans to be in my area.

 

Still...I'm surprised your guys wouldn't male a minimal effort to maintain good relations with someone they should consider a valuable client (unless they have no plans to return to your area.)

[nate_sf]

PK, if these are as you suggest "how are things going" emails, rather than definite proposals for a time and place, that is the problem. While you may think they have become friends etc., you are to them a potential client. They don't have the time or inclination to carry on a purely personal correspondence.

 

Hey PK, I know this is the Deli section so is meant to be mostly client discussion, but wanted to offer an escort's perspective. I agree with Merlin, when I receive a "how are you" email I may not immediately respond to it, not because I don't care about the person but because I am prioritizing emails that need a timely response such as for appointments. It's a triage more than anything. Then before you know it, the "how are you" emails have fallen down the list in the inbox and are really easy to forget about in the midst of day-to-day scheduling. There will be times where I'll be driving or in the shower and all of a sudden remember "oh yeah, I never replied to that email" so it may not be that you are off the radar.

 

I agree with the others, if you have definite plans to visit and make an appointment, you may have a different experience since your email will be an "action item" rather than a "get around to it" item. It's the more business-oriented side of the biz I suppose.

[Diverdan]

A phone call is the best method of dealing with these issues. I almost never send a "how are you?" or "what's happening?" email or any other just general inquiry anymore to anyone. I too have had to wait several days or a couple of weeks for a response, but it was always related to a specific inquiry, and the delay was easily understood by me when I had the phone conversation. If this is someone you like and want to get together with, pick up the phone or send a text message. Good luck.

[AdamATL77]

If you are contacting these escorts by email and not getting an answer, check your spam settings. It could be happening on their end too. I recently had a problem where none of my replies were making it to the client. Since this client had changed telephone numbers, I could not get a hold of him. As an escort, I often screen my calls too. I would suggest if they have an ad on M4RN, you use their email system and include your mobile number. RentMen does do double-duty with their email system but that can go to spam too. I have responded late to some clients because Gmail and Thunderbird were marking RentMen as junk. Be sure to mention the screen name, handle, or whatever you used before to jog their memory.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

I would suggest if they have an ad on M4RN, you use their email system and include your mobile number.

 

Adam's suggestion is good. My preferred masseur changed his email and I didn't realize it. His notice to me about the change hit my spam folder so I missed out on two monthly appointments when I couldn't schedule time. It was contacting him through an email on his ad that put me back in touch with him.

[down_to_business]

Corresponding with escorts is such a mixed bag that I don't even know where to begin.

 

On-going communications:

 

In general (and I stress in general and not all) but this is based on conversations with many many different escorts is that they prefer you do not contact them unless it is to make a specific appointment. That doesn not mean there are not escorts that won't respond to your 'how are you emails' or whatever else you send them, but they would prefer if given the choice that you are solely contacting them to make an appointment or possibly confirm your appointment (ONE TIME). This has been the opinion of every single escort I have ever met or spoke too. In fact, I have been thanked ( sometimes profusely) by numerous escorts for not emailing them more than once to make the appointment and once to confirm. I never email an escort to just say hi-- as much as I might want to, (because there are some great guys out there that I really like and would love to correspond with) even though I do know that if I did, some of these great guys would take the time to email me back.

 

Also you guys should realize that ( IN GENERAL and not always or in every situation) an escort email to you that says 'how are you' means I am politely asking you if you would be interested in hiring me again for a specific appointment.

 

This is somewhat similar to when you pass someone in the hall and you say 'hi' and they say 'how are you'. Do you think they really want to hear for the next 20 minutes that your bunions are acting up and you have hemmoroids. No its a polite greeting that you are supposed to answer with 'fine thanks, or ok..'how are you' and you politely move on. In this case of escorts emailing you to say hi.. they are just politely reminding you that if you want to hire them for a specific appointment, then please do so.

 

Responding to emails:

 

As mentioned above, there are many reasons your initial emails never get answered. Some are simple things like their ad is inactive, they aren't in your area anymore, or they are busy etc. Some is based on junk email settings. Some is based on your email itself.. you were too explicit for them in your initial contact, you were requesting something they weren't interested in, you didn't seem like you were asking for an appointment or ever would, some don't do emails at all- they will only do phone calls-- and this potential list goes on and on and on and on.

 

 

Recommendation:

 

If you want to increase the perecntages of getting answered. 1) Anytime you email an escort, make sure its clear you are looking to make a specific appointment for a set time and date. 2) If there is time, give them a few days to respond. Be patient, you could not even imagine the number of emails some of these guys get on a given day. 3) After giving them a few days to reply, if there is no response, and you want to make a specific appointment, follow up your email with a phone call. Leave a message if they don't answer and try to indicate you are attempting to set up a specific appointment, 4) Give them a day or two to return your phone call (time permitting). 5) If you don't get a reply to your email and follow-up phone message, MOVE-ON!

 

Other do's and don'ts

 

1) DON'T make an appointment today for July 4th weekend and then email the escort every 3 days for the next month and tell them how much you are looking forward to the meeting, yadda..yadda..yadda. Trust me on this.. they will LOVE YOU (figuratively not literally) if you make your appointment, possibly confirm by email a week or so out, and confirm by phone either the night before or the day of your appointment (or that your flight landed etc.). Note: It is ok to respond to their request to you for an additional confirmation.

 

 

DISCLAIMER: I do not speak for all and never claim I do or that I know everything. This is just years of conversations and observations.

[Dave]

hey PK....i totally understand....that has happened to me with two of my favorite out-of-town guys....it hurts

 

not assuming anything - but i would feel terrible if i didn't respond to an email you sent me. last thing i would want to do would be to hurt you, best hotel - - - you are so sweet.

[Dave]

the points about changed email addresses and messages going to spam folders are both realistic, and probably more common than one might think.

 

i can totally relate to how nate_sf's "how are you" emails fall down the list, and unintentionally get forgotten. i've definitely been guilty of that, when other things (not just setting up appointments) have taken priority.

 

and i'm REALLY impressed by the insight offered by down_to_business. dude, that comment rocked!

 

i sometimes will hear from an established or new client that they tried to contact me and didnt hear anything back. when i ask the method of communication, its invariably by text. i dont get text messages, and although i state that on my site, unfortunately some people still text me.

 

about two hours ago i happened to check the mailbox at my apartment. i actually get my personal mail at my house - which is different than my apt - and i also have a po box in a post office, for getting sex-related stuff. i never give out my apt address for getting mail. but, a very nice client who obviously knew of my apt number sent me something - three weeks ago! what he must have been thinking is beyond me, probably how rude i've been not to call and say "thank you" all this time.

 

i guess my point is that we escorts do sometimes not respond to people - but (at least in my case) it's not because we don't want to. personally, i don't believe in ignoring people, even when there's no individual benefit in having the conversation. escort or otherwise, i think it's always good to give people the benefit of the doubt and try them again.

 

i like the "three times" idea, and would suggest using multiple methods of contact as you do your three ways. woops - i mean three methods - sorry - i guess three ways sound like so much more fun than just contacting someone!

 

with so many communication options - texting, social networking, tweeting, voicemail, email, snailmail, etc, i still think live phone calls are amongst the most effective and efficient.

[leigh.bess.toad]

sorry - i guess three ways sound like so much more fun

 

That's certainly been my experience. We may have to try that sometime. Oh, wait. We have. Twice now.

 

Oops. My bad.

 

But I didn't know about the text. Sorry about the text I sent you last Sunday. It won't happen again. I guess you'll have to devise some form of punhisment for me about that. Maybe involving that hood???

[best hotel]

thank you dave....you made me smile