Tipping & Communication Etiquette

[hot_tk28]

So I have a question. Keep in mind I'm new to this. When seeing someone in a spa, I know to tip well, especially if they go "above & beyond." but someone who posts their rates on M4M or CL and does it in their own home- they're pocketing all of that. Is there still a percentage or expectation to tip?

 

Also, I had my first nude sensual massage and at the end, the guy basically mounted me and shoved his cock down my throat. I pulled back a few times (I'm presonally not really into that- I wanted to have release, not suck off the masseur) and just came as quickly as possible, pulled on my clothes and left. Through the whole thing there was very little talking. Do you discuss things up front or is that being presumptuous, so you wait until the moment starts?

[josephga]

When it comes to tipping imo you tip what you feel is appropriate. I had a client that bought 2 massages a week who never tipped. Id rather have him on the table those 2 times a week than a tip. true that in a spa you don't get all the money most spa's collect 30 to 45 % it varies. in home we pay for advertising and supplies then pocket the rest. For a 75.00 massage some guys tipped 5.00 up to 25.00 every so often id get someone beyond generous tipping more than the price of the massage. for your second question imo things should be discussed up front. know how its going to play out. imo a masseur or massage therapist is entitled to only one thing and that's payment at the end. that masseur was out of line. iv heard stores of masseurs sticking their dicks in clients mouths or getting on the table and fucking them and without asking first. imo that's out of line. Anyone that called me was told exactly how it played out. I normally said something like its a full body massage, hand contact only meaning no oral or anal penetration. I think you should always be str8 up on what you expect from the masseur and they should be str8 up with you.. also id add If a masseur agrees to work in the nude never put your hands on them without asking for permission first. Not all masseurs want a clients hands on them nude or not.

[+ beethoven]

So I have a question. Keep in mind I'm new to this. When seeing someone in a spa, I know to tip well, especially if they go "above & beyond." but someone who posts their rates on M4M or CL and does it in their own home- they're pocketing all of that. Is there still a percentage or expectation to tip?

 

Also, I had my first nude sensual massage and at the end, the guy basically mounted me and shoved his cock down my throat. I pulled back a few times (I'm presonally not really into that- I wanted to have release, not suck off the masseur) and just came as quickly as possible, pulled on my clothes and left. Through the whole thing there was very little talking. Do you discuss things up front or is that being presumptuous, so you wait until the moment starts?

 

Regarding communication, and understanding each other BEFORE the masssage, Josephga is right, as he always

seems to be. On the phone, or in e-mail, I ask the massseur if he will be nude, if there will be mutual touching (I hate that word "allowed;" it sounds like they're doing me a big favor), if there is lots of body-to-body contact, and if all parts of my body will be massaged. I make a point of not using vulgarities. When the masseur arrives, I ASK him if I may remove his shirt. (A few have said no, and that tells me right away what the boundaries will be.) I place his hand on my genitals before I place my hand on his. If a masseur "shoves his cock" where I don't want it shoved, I would just say no. Discussing things up front is NOT presumptuous; it's common sense. Hey, YOU'RE the customer, and it's YOUR money! The customer isn't always right, but the customer sets the ground rules. It's my house, and it's my rules!

As a rule, I don't tip. (I've never been to a spa.) Although I always tip waiters and cab drivers, I feel that a masseur sets his price (which is high enough), and there's no need to tip. If a masseur charges a low fee to begin with, and I really liked him and intend to see him again, I may add $10 or $20 to what I give him. It's really an individual preference. I don't think I'm being a cheapskate, nor do I think that people who tip generously are foolish.

[+ Axiom2001]

During the past three years, perhaps four-- I've engaged the services of masseurs, but rarely have I tipped. They've seemed ok with this because I'd presume the rates that they charge ($80 and upwards) are ample; thus they have NOT expected to receive any additional money. (All of the massages have been done on the masseurs' premises--studio or space in their apartments/houses.

 

Next month when I go to see my manicurist who has her own business in a shop and charges $30.00 (I've been giving her $35.)--I do NOT know if I will tip her because she will be increasing her rates. If she will NOT be getting a tip, then I'll give her a great gift next Christmas.

[Diverdan]

Well, I guess I have a little different attitude towards tipping. Like many other service professionals, I tip based on service provided. I always tip my barber, even though his rates are some of the highest in the area. He is always willing to accomodate my schedule and often fits me in when I know he is fully booked. I think that is in part because I tip him on a regular basis and provide a very generous cash Christmas gift. If I get a "great" massage, I always tip the masseur, whether it is a private one or one in a spa. However, if the massage is mediocre, if there has been a problem, etc., then the masseur gets no tip. I would love to have a regular masseur, but so far the ones I want are not in the cities where I spend the most time.

DD

[instudiocity]

I keep seeing these discussions about when to tip and when not to tip, how much to tip, etc. Let's remember a few basics of giving money:

 

First, a TIP became know as a tip because it was a fee given TO INSURE PROMPTNESS. Generally TIPs are given at the beginning of service rather than at the end. I think the New Yorkers among us will agree that a good table seating provided quickly in a busy restaurant comes only with a TIP to the maitre d'.

 

I think because of the variations in service in a restaurant, where one might by a meal and another is buying a dining experience beginning with cocktails to wine, appetizers to entreés and desserts, TIPs were moved to the bill presentation side of the meal so that an appropriate sum could be given based upon the value and service during the dining experience.

 

I look at my service requirements in the escort/massage world as already priced at the provider's rate. I've read many service providers here to say they work for their rate. My current boytoy says, "I get my rate." So I don't worry about 'tipping' service providers in this arena. I do however choose to provide a GRATUITY to them for their excellent (and often repeat) service.

 

A Gratuity can often be in the form of Cash, but if there is some other item I know would be appreciated, I don't hesitate to give a gift. Sometimes, I may see my boytoy for 3-4 sessions and simply pay his rate. I don't feel the least bit guilty for it, because at some point, I am going to provide a GRATUITY in the form of CASH or an appropriate gift that I know he will love.