How Much Talk is Too much?

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

I am wondering how much talk between client and escort is too much talk? I like to get to know people before meeting. I dont mind emailing, but at times I like to actually be able to talk. I know that people are busy and I try be very respectful of that, but I am didnt think that a 15 minute phone call once or twice a month is too much to stay in touch. Am I wrong?

[doitb4ugo]

Hey Indy,

 

The general answer here on the forum is "it depends" and in this case it does. Each escort has different tolerance levels for discussion outside of the time it takes to book an appointment and discuss expectations. The best advice ican give is ask them what level of discourse they are Okay with. I have some escorts who correspond regularly - every few weeks or monthly and one or two who do not show any interest in corresponding at all. I generally ask when I send my quick note after we've met for our session. I like to send a thank you and express what a good time I had...saying something personal about our meeting.

 

I am currently seeing an escort who requests feedback and a report card for each encounter..These a BDSM sessions and the give and take of what worked and didn't is very important for a longer term relatonship...

 

Hope this was helpful and welcome to the Forum.

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

Thanks you for the feedback Rich and the welcome...

 

I do feel like I get a mixed signals. And I know he would prefer email and he is pretty good at answering emails as soon as he can so he definately does correspond. It is just that at times, I would like to hear his voice on the other end to remind me why I am working overtime. ;-)

[+ Charlie]

Your question implies that you have made a first appointment pretty far in advance (more than a month), and I sense that the escort may be giving you signals that he isn't interested in long conversations with you beforehand. Since you haven't met yet, he may fear that you are a talker rather than a serious client. Fifteen minutes is a fairly long phone conversation with a stranger, and while it may make you feel more comfortable with him, he may feel that he is wasting his time, especially if you are calling during his business hours. An occasional very short call, just to establish that your appointment with him is still set, or to mention something about what will happen in the appointment that you have neglected to bring up before, would be appropriate, but a long "friendly chat" for no other purpose would probably not be considered appropriate by most busy escorts.

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

I have met this particular escort, twice actually with another appointment planned.

[+ Charlie]

Aha! Then I misunderstood the situation. In that case, if he is giving signals that he doesn't want to converse very much, I would back off a bit--he may want the relationship to be more businesslike and impersonal than you would like. Intimacy is an important part of the escort's job, during an appointment, but he may not want to continue to play that role when he is off the clock, so to speak. What feels like an innocent desire for friendly connection, to you, may look like potential stalking to him. Why not have a frank discussion with him about it at your next appointment?

[uwsman2]

The thing to keep in mind is that this is a business and time is money. The time an escort spends on the phone with you is time he is not accessible for other callers. For some this may be no big deal, for others it might loom as an impediment to the success of their business. It all depends on the nature of their business -- does it rely heavily on spontaneous phone calls or is his method of operation more focused on continuing relationships?

[justaguy]

Indy, I'm not much of an afterglow person, but I do like email as foreplay to set the tone and mood for an appointment. At the same time, I'm very conscious of the time=money equation. I haven't tried it, but this thought just hit me. If you're trying to establish and on-going working relationship with a guy (emphasis on working), one thing you might consider is talking to the guy about what you would like and agreeing on a fee.

 

Indy, 15 minutes a couple of times a month doesn't sound like much, but that's three hours over the course of a year. In average compensation that would be $600. Put in those terms, you can see why an escort might feel you were trying to get something for nothing. I haven't really thought this through but do feel that the fee should be less than that of a face to face meeting--how much, I have no idea. If this sounds good at all, talk to your escort.

[Epigonos]

Frankly there are a great number of variables involved in addressing this thread. Probably the major consideration is what type of arrangement have you and the escort established. Do you get together occasionally for an hour of fun? Do you get together on a regular basis for an hour of fun? Do you get together occasionally for lunch/dinner and a couple of hours of fun? Do you get together on a regular basis for lunch/dinner and a couple of hour of fun? Do you get together on a regular basis for extended periods of time?

I, for example, have been seeing Steven Kesslar for nine years. We travel together for extended periods of time. We also get together occasionally for overnights. I TRY to do most of my contacts with Steven by email as that allows him to reply at his convenience. If I need to make telephone contact the first question I ALWAYS ask is: Do you have the time to talk and is this time convenient? Infrequently he has stated that he is on his way somewhere and has only a limited amount of time to talk. I ALWAYS honor that limit.

You and only you know the ground rules of your relationship with the escort. If you are unsure about any aspect of that relationship -- ASK HIM!!!!!

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

Thanks for the insight Epigonos and Justaguy! Very helpful!

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

Epigonos, I took you advice. To my surprise, I got a phone call today from this particular escort and had a wonderful 45 minute phone conversation about this topic along with making plans for our next visit. He was able to allay all my concerns and I wanted to thank you for your advice.

[instudiocity]

Indy, I think if you think of your relationship as Friends with Benefits, it will work out alright. His benefit might include some cash, but let's hope he's getting more from the relationship than just rent money.

[Epigonos]

Am extremely glad to learn that things turned out well.

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

I like the way you think... We both get the things we are needing/looking for. I can honestly say I think of him as a good friend and spending 3 full days with him as only served to make us alot closer. I got a chance to talk to him for an hour today without feeling rushed and even set up plans for our next visit including getting him an airline ticket! YAY! Thanks you for the advice and I will take it to heart!

[scottspearsxxx]

I have no problem corresponding with potential and repeat customers via email at any time. I want the client to feel as comfortable with me as possible. If it is a potential client, I think you know when someone is clearly interested and when someone is just playing games.

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

I have no problem corresponding with potential and repeat customers via email at any time. I want the client to feel as comfortable with me as possible. If it is a potential client, I think you know when someone is clearly interested and when someone is just playing games.

 

It is nice to hear that busy popular guy is ok with communication and is concerned about a clients comfort

[instudiocity]

It is nice to hear that busy popular guy is ok with communication and is concerned about a clients comfort

Hmm, think maybe the Art of the Sale includes exposing oneself to potential clients outside the bedroom? Maybe sorta wanna have more than a 'this client loves my pose in this one picture' and that's all I know about him?

 

Worthy Escorts understand that being laid in our heads is more important than being laid in the bed. Mystery and surprise is good when it's framed by the common ground of communication and sharing.

 

I wouldn't give two hoots in hell about gettin' nekkid with Daddy's TOP-RATED escort, if I didn't have some things in common with him other than his pics are causing me to go blind...

[Guest IndyMedic2006]

Well said ISC! I couldnt have said it better myself!

[leigh.bess.toad]

Worthy Escorts understand that being laid in our heads is more important than being laid in the bed. Mystery and surprise is good when it's framed by the common ground of communication and sharing.

 

I wouldn't give two hoots in hell about gettin' nekkid with Daddy's TOP-RATED escort, if I didn't have some things in common with him other than his pics are causing me to go blind...

 

Like IM, I definitely have to agree with you ISC. I think that sort of illujstrates some of the discussions we've had about hiring older escorts, because even they're not as old as I am (I remember when dirt was invented), we certainly have more in common and a more mature approach to things that fits in better with what I'm looking for.