How often does a client just up and leave?

[JoeyBryant]

I am finding recently there seems to be a select client or 2 who for whatever reason, are coming in...and leaving in less than a minute. You would think I'd be embarrassed to mention such a thing, but I've been told countless numbers of time that I look "just like the picture", so I'd imagine its not looks.

 

The other weekend, someone came in...and then left me a bill because he was 'too nervous'. Then tonight...another one just walks right on for no apparent reason. From the moment we met downstairs til coming up to the room, he had like 30 seconds to change his mind, but waited til I got into the room.

 

Its like, I understand its going to happen eventually to any one of us...so it feels unjustified to even be upset over it, but I actually am. The 1st time, I was like..whatever, its 230 am anyway. But this time, Im just annoyed. Not that I let any of them know it, but it takes a few hours for it to wear off

[+ purplekow]

Sorry that this has happened to you twice recently. I would think that if a client is going to be so nervous as to not complete the visit, that it would be most likely to happen before he met the escort. Every time I hire a new escort, there is a little sigh of relief when he looks like his photos and is not obviously drunk or some other way intoxicated, and he seems like a reasonable human being, but if nerves were to get the best of me, I think it would be prior to meeting the escort at all. It is hard to take this in stride because it does cost you time and money, but buck up big guy, better things are ahead.

[JoeyBryant]

Well, part of me is thinking its because I've met those guys too late at night (after 'normal' business hours). Although I didnt waste time driving outcall, it makes me leery about staying in the same hotel when guys do that. It just seems weird. I think Im switching rooms tomorrow.

[wayout]

I find that to be quite strange and agree with PK that one would expect that the client would back out before the meeting if they were so nervous. Not saying it is anything more than just the clients getting cold feet, but for peace of mind you probably should change rooms or even hotels if feasible.

 

Out of curiosity, were these late night meetings last minute arrangements? Is it unusual for you to accept those meetings? If so it might have been an impulse buy that they decided they could not go through with (not excusing their behavior but just wondering). Did you get a sense that there was alcohol or other substances involved that might have been a factor in their courage to hire (but wasn't enough to go through with it)?

 

You mention in your blog that you are now touring smaller towns and I am wondering if you have noticed if the clients you are meeting in these smaller towns seem to you, in general, to be less experienced or comfortable with an escort? Do you believe that the way to interact with clients (particularly at the start of the meeting) requires a different approach depending on whether the client is from a big city or small town, or even based on regional differences? I am just trying to consider why such a situation may have arisen and speculating on the reasons (assuming these two instances happened in a smaller town).

 

In any case, I hope that those two instances you mention are isolated ones and that things improve dramatically for you.

[josephga]

I had it happen once with a massage client. He books shows up I let him in. He then says I'm so sorry Joe I just can't do it. I said well you can see its a professional set up table and all just as i explained on the phone. He said oh no it's not you, it's me Iv never had a massage b4. I tried booking with guys b4 but normally chickened out and canceled. I thought if i can just get inside the studio i could go though with it, but i now know I can't. I just stepped aside and let him go.. However I think the right thing to do would be to pay anyway those were his issues not mine and i think the person should be paid.

[orbital sander]

I had it happen once with a massage client. He books shows up I let him in. He then says I'm so sorry Joe I just can't do it. I said well you can see its a professional set up table and all just as i explained on the phone. He said oh no it's not you, it's me Iv never had a massage b4. I tried booking with guys b4 but normally chickened out and canceled. I thought if i can just get inside the studio i could go though with it, but i now know I can't. I just stepped aside and let him go.. However I think the right thing to do would be to pay anyway those were his issues not mine and i think the person should be paid.

 

Hey nice to see you here again!

 

In regards to the OP:

There is so many variables as to what could have been going on, it is very hard to comment, other than I have hardly ever heard of this. Must have been a strange alignment of the stars...

[JoeyBryant]

Out of curiosity, were these late night meetings last minute arrangements? Is it unusual for you to accept those meetings? If so it might have been an impulse buy that they decided they could not go through with (not excusing their behavior but just wondering). Did you get a sense that there was alcohol or other substances involved that might have been a factor in their courage to hire (but wasn't enough to go through with it)?

 

You mention in your blog that you are now touring smaller towns and I am wondering if you have noticed if the clients you are meeting in these smaller towns seem to you, in general, to be less experienced or comfortable with an escort? Do you believe that the way to interact with clients (particularly at the start of the meeting) requires a different approach depending on whether the client is from a big city or small town, or even based on regional differences? I am just trying to consider why such a situation may have arisen and speculating on the reasons (assuming these two instances happened in a smaller town).

 

In any case, I hope that those two instances you mention are isolated ones and that things improve dramatically for you.

 

Thats definently sounds about right. Both were rather last minute...however, we'd corresponded earlier during the week. Although Im no longer in a small town, I am still on the tip of what would be considered the bible belt by the locals and so I would think its natural. But in the same sense, they aren't even giving themselves a chance to get comfortable. In addition, both were mentioning 'having drinks' prior to the appointment...so much for loosened inhibitions

 

Overall though, things have been going well...which is why I was thrown off by the 2 just walking out. I dont think the approach is any different than a nervous guy in a big city. But there is a certain amount of caution that should be expected out here.

 

But like Joseph said...I understand that people get nervous but at the same time it takes 2 to tango and I've met guys who were extremely nervous too but went on with it, maybe just leaving within 15-20 minutes instead of an hour. But to just up and walk out, it wastes not only my time...but theirs too. But, if it makes em happy, so be it. No one is obligated or promising to stay, just like Im not obligated or promising to stay at a certain resturaunt when I walk in. I just dont like the fake, "I left my keys in the car, oh my wallet, etc. ect."

[raife]

Reasons for a quick exit...

 

I must confess that I've left quickly on several occasions. I am very sensitive to red flags, and if the chemistry isn't there, I spot some negative body language, if he's not enthused to meet me, no warm greeting, a "let's get this shit over with..." vibe, something in the environment seems amiss, I'm out of there as quickly and confrontation-free as possible. I can say "this is just not going to work" or "I left something in the car", whatever it takes to avoid drama.

 

I'm nervous enough about a set-up, ambush or sting as it is. I want to connect with guys who love their work, (and there are plenty of them). If it seems a chore for you, I'm going to be unhappy, there's no sense in paying for what I can tell is going to be a miserable experience.

 

Mostly it's asking for money up front though, that will send me out of there so fast his head will spin. Communicate that bullshit up front if you want to avoid time wastage for all, then we can both go our merry way.

 

I really miss the bars, where we could meet, have a drink, and see if the chemistry is right before we head off to the room. I greatly prefer regulars for these reasons, trust, respect and knowing what to expect from each other.

[JoeyBryant]

Mostly it's asking for money up front though, that will send me out of there so fast his head will spin. Communicate that bullshit up front if you want to avoid time wastage for all, then we can both go our merry way.

 

I really miss the bars, where we could meet, have a drink, and see if the chemistry is right before we head off to the room. I greatly prefer regulars for these reasons, trust, respect and knowing what to expect from each other.

 

Well, although I prefer getting the business part out the way first...in these cases, they backed out before I could even ask for anything. I usually start by offering them a drink, and then conversation. after a minute or so of me being bombarded with questions...I'll walk away to maybe throw an imaginary paper in the garbage just to give them some space if I sense they are nervous. Usually they'll have gotten comfortable when I come back in, but if they are nervous then thats the oppurtunity for them to tell me at that moment. Which is exactly what happened.

 

But the guy from yesterday, he had the gall to say, "I left my phone, is there a way I could slide a card thru the front lobby door to get back in? You better let me back in when I come up!" In which I replied..."well, it was nice meeting you". He seemed utterly surprised, but anyone who walks out my room within 1 minute wont be allowed back up.

[Guest Merlin]

Any time some one backs out at the last minute, one of the possible reasons is that he, for whatever reason, thinks you might be a cop. You should review what was said and done in your own mind and try to see it from his point of view. Could he have thought that you were trying to get him to agree to pay for sex before you, yourself, did anything compromising? Did you discuss payment or ask for it up front?

[Prime Muscle]

I agree that the client could think you are a cop - I actually cancelled appointments becuase I thought it might be a sting. Another reason might be that the client wasn't planning on paying after you're done and once he looked at you he thought be better not try it.

[instudiocity]

I always reserve the right to cancel an appointment right up to walking into the room.

 

I've seen escort ads read, "If I'm not what you expect when I arrive, no harm, no foul."

 

I've also asked some escorts if we could meet at a coffee shop or bar first and if things go well, we'll proceed to more intimate surroundings. One time, I took the escort to dinner and during the dinner I was so overwhelmed by the escort's negativity that at the end of the meal I said, "Joe, you're a nice guy, but I think I'd like to end our date now. Is one hour's compensation enough?"

 

But yeah, if I get to an appointment and the "This isn't what I was hoping for" bell goes off, I'm outta there!

[Diverdan]

Lots of Reasons...

 

It is a bit strange to have those two experiences so close together, but as several posters have already said, there can be many reasons for "walking out" and having two together in such a short span of time may just be coincidence. But, I do have a couple of comments. I have only walked out of an appointment a couple of times, but have had a couple of experiences where I wish I had walked out. In both instances, it was obvious the guy was either drunk or high on drugs, and I always make it clear up front that I don't get involved with someone who does that. I know this does not apply to you. However, I never "pay up front" and also make that clear ahead of time, and I know some guys are turned off by that situation.

 

Your instincts to change rooms or change hotels is a good one, as you can never know if this was the prelude to a set up.

[+ peterhung85]

I am finding recently there seems to be a select client or 2 who for whatever reason, are coming in...and leaving in less than a minute. You would think I'd be embarrassed to mention such a thing, but I've been told countless numbers of time that I look "just like the picture", so I'd imagine its not looks.

 

The other weekend, someone came in...and then left me a bill because he was 'too nervous'. Then tonight...another one just walks right on for no apparent reason. From the moment we met downstairs til coming up to the room, he had like 30 seconds to change his mind, but waited til I got into the room.

 

Its like, I understand its going to happen eventually to any one of us...so it feels unjustified to even be upset over it, but I actually am. The 1st time, I was like..whatever, its 230 am anyway. But this time, Im just annoyed. Not that I let any of them know it, but it takes a few hours for it to wear off

 

I do not think you should be embarrassed or upset... There are different people all over the world and they do not react the same way (especially if they see a hot guy like you)... It has never happened to me though... I have met some extremely nervous clients before but after a while I was able to "soothen" them

 

Wish you the best!

[JoshAB]

Any time some one backs out at the last minute, one of the possible reasons is that he, for whatever reason, thinks you might be a cop. You should review what was said and done in your own mind and try to see it from his point of view. Could he have thought that you were trying to get him to agree to pay for sex before you, yourself, did anything compromising? Did you discuss payment or ask for it up front?

 

When did you become a cop? Congratulations! I think posting on here might blow your cover though. Shhhhh!

[JoeyBryant]

I agree that the client could think you are a cop - I actually cancelled appointments becuase I thought it might be a sting. Another reason might be that the client wasn't planning on paying after you're done and once he looked at you he thought be better not try it.

 

Well, during my visits to portions of the midwest...I noticed a steep incline in the amount of, "are you a policeman/cop" questions. Totally understandable, but it just goes to show. One such guy made my heart skip a beat because I thought he was revealing himself, but he was actually just asking me the question. And then, we ended up spending a wonderful 3 hours together (pardon the self review)! So...for someone to walk out because they 'think' Im a cop is a bit cowardly. Ask and ye shall recieve (an answer).

 

I do not think you should be embarrassed or upset... There are different people all over the world and they do not react the same way (especially if they see a hot guy like you)... It has never happened to me though... I have met some extremely nervous clients before but after a while I was able to "soothen" them

 

Wish you the best!

 

Thanks for the words of courage. After those 2 instances, I was starting to feel doubtful LOL. But, it could be anything. I guess the saying, "you cant please everyone" is so true. But still...no excuse to just be walking in and out like that. I honestly believe some people are just curious to see what the inside of a certain hotel looks like, just to be nosy. Those people need to get a life...And if it is a reservation about me, they need to mention it to perhaps come to an understanding.

[devonhunter]

I haven't yet experienced anything like this (knock on wood); however, I have been hearing with some frequency lately that a particular escort has had several clients walk out early, simply because he was completely insufferable in person.

 

As for the cop references, I have a funny story: At one of the clubs where I was dancing the competing bar called the police on us for having drugs in the bar (which we did not have). When the police showed up to raid us and found nothing, we all dressed in our cop costumes and offered them lap dances. THEEZ NUTZ!!! bwahahahahahaha!

 

 

Well, during my visits to portions of the midwest...I noticed a steep incline in the amount of, "are you a policeman/cop" questions. Totally understandable, but it just goes to show. One such guy made my heart skip a beat because I thought he was revealing himself, but he was actually just asking me the question. And then, we ended up spending a wonderful 3 hours together (pardon the self review)! So...for someone to walk out because they 'think' Im a cop is a bit cowardly. Ask and ye shall recieve (an answer).

 

 

 

Thanks for the words of courage. After those 2 instances, I was starting to feel doubtful LOL. But, it could be anything. I guess the saying, "you cant please everyone" is so true. But still...no excuse to just be walking in and out like that. I honestly believe some people are just curious to see what the inside of a certain hotel looks like, just to be nosy. Those people need to get a life...And if it is a reservation about me, they need to mention it to perhaps come to an understanding.

[leigh.bess.toad]

As for the cop references, I have a funny story: At one of the clubs where I was dancing the competing bar called the police on us for having drugs in the bar (which we did not have). When the police showed up to raid us and found nothing, we all dressed in our cop costumes and offered them lap dances. THEEZ NUTZ!!! bwahahahahahaha!

 

Come on devon -- inquiring minds want to know. Did any of them take you up on the offer? That would have been NUTZ! But a great story.

[devonhunter]

No, unfortunately... They looked at us as though we'd tried to poison them; however, the other cop-raiding-the-club story I have is just as funny.

 

Evidently someone had a drug of some kind in the bathroom. Something like 20 police officers came busting up into the joint (a small LGBT bar in Florence, SC), trying to bully closeted, southern gay people. Well, I'm standing up on the podium in my underwear under a spotlight. There isn't anything wrong with that: They were full back underwear, thank you very much. Anyway, a couple of the officers came up to me and stared at me. I don't back down from intimidation (as some of you may recall). I looked at them and said, "Looking much longer is the same as touching, and then you'll owe me a dollar. Why don't I show you where you can stick it?" I don't think they were expecting that. They slinked away to try their nonsense on someone else. LOL

 

 

Come on devon -- inquiring minds want to know. Did any of them take you up on the offer? That would have been NUTZ! But a great story.

[EZEtoGRU]

Three comments:

 

1. I once terminated an appointment with an escort in Amsterdam 5 minutes after he arrived at my hotel room. He looked perfectly handsome........but was quite effeminate. I had specifically requested a manly/masculine top from the agency. It was clear he was none of this when he walked in the door. In this case I paid his full fee and asked him to leave. I called after to the agency to complain but really just chalked it up to experience. I did make me reluctant to use agencies in the future. By the way, this was more than 10 years ago. Long before internet escort sites.

 

2. I get totally turned off by escorts that ask for money up front. Usually it is a big red flag for me that the encounter will not be very rewarding. This is just my view and I know not shared by everyone. I know this is not what happened in the OP's case as it did not even get that far.

 

3. As we have seen in the multitude of replies there can be many many reasons for a customer walking out. It could be all about him(nervousness, internal conflicts, drugs/alcohol, money, etc) or it could be his perception of the escort once meeting him.

[JoeyBryant]

It was clear he was none of this when he walked in the door. In this case I paid his full fee and asked him to leave.

 

I get totally turned off by escorts that ask for money up front.

 

Atleast you paid his fee! Couple weeks ago, I had something go down that I really didn't want to discuss on this board as it would have came off very dramatic, but now that I've learned my lesson, Im not as livid about it.

 

Again, in the midwest...had a client from A4A (and you know my feelings about a4a) who walked out in the most treacherous way imaginable. After a good few minutes of foreplay, I step into the bathroom for a moment. The room I was in had exits on each side which made it easier for someone to make a quick getaway. When I came out, he was gone along with the money that was placed on the dresser. I guess he felt that 15 min. of foreplay was better than parting with my full fee.

 

Since I left the midwest, I have not been encountering that type of non-sense (but dont be fooled, it can happen anywhere to anyone of us). Although the money is decent over there, a few people I encountered both work and personal seemed to be resentful of their desire to meet a man.

 

In additon, my fee is collected up front...I had to send 1 guy to the ATM after he'd showed up $100 short. Now imagine if I'd done everything and waited afterwards? Intimacy is unrefundable, and un-reversable. I cant take back what was done. Once its done, its done.

 

Now, I may allow some leeway if Im visiting their place, but when its my place...its too easy for them to walk. And what Im going to do, call the police? Tell the hotel manager what happened and risk getting found out? They know where Im at if I tried to stiff them, I dont know where they are at if they try and stiff me.

 

And I find that when you are traveling, the amount of chancers goes up dramatically. They know you're in for just a short time, and they make incalls so they can stiff you if you let them. Once I get the fee upfront, we are now on level ground. I know I'll deliver, I need to see it from them.

[EZEtoGRU]

I did pay his fee in order to avoid a "scene". However, I feel I would have been within my rights not to pay since the agency did not deliver what was promissed. Had the encounter been at the escorts place or at the agency, I might well have declined the encounter once meeting him....and not paid him. I would never just walk out without saying anything. I would have indicated the agency did not provide what was requested, and that therefore, I was not obligated to continue the encounter nor to pay the fee. When the encounter happens at your own hotel or apartment, the other person has the upper hand when things go wrong.....as you mentioned above.

[Guest Wetnwildbear]

Sometimes its Hard to be a . . .

 

I am finding recently there seems to be a select client or 2 who for whatever reason, are coming in...and leaving in less than a minute. You would think I'd be embarrassed to mention such a thing, but I've been told countless numbers of time that I look "just like the picture", so I'd imagine its not looks.

 

The other weekend, someone came in...and then left me a bill because he was 'too nervous'. Then tonight...another one just walks right on for no apparent reason. From the moment we met downstairs til coming up to the room, he had like 30 seconds to change his mind, but waited til I got into the room.

 

Its like, I understand its going to happen eventually to any one of us...so it feels unjustified to even be upset over it, but I actually am. The 1st time, I was like..whatever, its 230 am anyway. But this time, Im just annoyed. Not that I let any of them know it, but it takes a few hours for it to wear off

 

 

Whenever I read your threads they seem like a bad Country/Western Song - It seems like your escort life is dripping

 

with tragedy - Please share something happy, positive and pleasant - even if you have to make it up!

[orbital sander]

Whenever I read your threads they seem like a bad Country/Western Song - It seems like your escort life is dripping

 

with tragedy - Please share something happy, positive and pleasant - even if you have to make it up!

 

Careful, this one can be volatile...

[JoeyBryant]

Whenever I read your threads they seem like a bad Country/Western Song - It seems like your escort life is dripping

 

with tragedy - Please share something happy, positive and pleasant - even if you have to make it up!

 

Obviously you dont read my blog....