Silk Purse or Sow's Ear - A Bottoms Dilema

[doitb4ugo]

Silk Purse or Sow's Ear - A Bottom's Dilema

 

Having recently had my first "bottom" experience (it's all been recent), I have a somewhat embarassing question to pose.

 

Bottoming, for me was a huge turn-on yet I found it impossible to remain hard during the activity.I had expected that my erection would return shortly after the action. It did not (). Needless to say - no happy ending for me. ....Is this something that happens? and more importantly, are there techniques to make a silk purse out of a sow's ear so to speak. Not that it was anywhere near a sow's ear.

 

Admittedly, the sensations experienced were quite nice (an understatement) but a release would have been the icing on my cake. My apologies for the indelicate nature of this query and for really mixing my metaphors in this post...

[Epigonos]

doitb4ugo NO need to be embarrassed by what happened to you or for asking about the commonality of your experience. As far as I concerned there is “virtually” nothing about gay sex that should not be asked in this forum. The only really dumb question is the one NOT asked.

 

Now as far as not maintaining a hard-on while you’re being fucked – join the crowd. Most guys don’t do so. Even in porn many bottoms don’t keep a hard-on. They frequently try to hide the fact by keeping a hand cupped over their soft cock. Some bottoms are able to maintain a hard-on while they are being fucked by constant masturbation either by themselves or by the top or by BOTH. Some others are able to regain their hard-on ONLY after the top withdraws and then they are able to cum.

 

Remember the old adage “practice makes perfect”. You will simply have to keep trying different approaches to learn what works best for you. The one really great thing about learning to be sexually proficient is that the practice is so damn much fun.

 

You need to learn to relax and go with the flow. If the escort you are with is good he should be willing and able to explain any questions you have. Remember if the escort has been around for any time at all there is ABSOLUTEY nothing you could possiby ask him that he hasn't been asked before. This last point is one of the main reasons I love having sex with an escort. I can be ABSOLUTELY, COMPLETELY, TOTALLY frank, honest and up front with any questions or requests I have.

[+ nycman]

I actually think it's kinda hot when the bottom loses his hard on. At that point it's

ALL about his ass and MY cock. A head trip to be sure but it works for me. Having

said that I do try and make sure he gets off once we're done fucking. Nothing worse

that having to deal with a frustrated bottom all night...lol

 

PS If you're using poppers to bottom...they may be adding to your "problem".

[Bart]

Okay bottom expert here and yes it happens.

Yes practice is the best solution.

Yes do different positions.

Sometimes I get off before the fuck, which does not deter my sex drive.

If you only hired for an hour, consider 2 or 3, that is one main reason I do that so I have time.

Try experimenting while on your back, getting hard before the fuck and then let the gentleman take over while just playing with your hole with his dick without entering. The sensation sometimes is enough to get you really going and he starts to ease in and sometimes a quick over the top feeling.

But again experimenting is the best way and most fun!!!

[doitb4ugo]

Uh-Oh

 

Wow guys, I'm not having any problem getting hard reading this....looks like I have to keep practicing. Oh well, I guess, If I have to, I will give it a go. Thanks for your advice.

[instudiocity]

Five and Out

 

First five times I bottomed, softie, no release.

 

Sixth time, my escort stroked me while I was on my back. That worked!

 

Seventh time, hands free, but my escort was chewing my nips while fucking me.

[Guest sexantexan]

It happens, as everyone says. If you are able to resolve that situation, you might find another problem after that. I've had several bottoms that absolutely cannot continue with me in their ass after they've cum. "get out now!" More recently, I've sort of developed a complementary ability. I can often stay hard enough to remain inside the bottom if he wants to try to get off while I'm still inside him. Some guys like the sensation of cumming while being filled. Something else to practice until perfect!

[uwsman2]

the voice of long experience...

 

As a bottom of decades of experience, I can agree that it frequently happens that I lose my hard-on when being fucked, regardless of the position, although I find that if I am straddling my top and riding his cock and have my own lubed up and work it pretty hard, I can get it hard again and even shoot. But not always....

[Lankypeters]

If I take a Viagra before sex, I usually stay hard while getting fucked.

 

Consider, too, that even if you're not hard, you may experience an anal orgasm as your top's cock massages your prostate. Not everyone has anal orgasms, but if you do, they are the greatest. They make me just tingle all over. One working guy I see likes to feel my prostate grow tight as he works it with his finger, and then release itself into its usual spongy mass after when I climax. I've also on occasion had an anal orgasm and a dick orgasm in quick succession.

 

Many decades ago I had a prostate infection. Besides an antibiotic, the doc prescribed a series of finger massages in his office. At first, because of the infection, the procedure hurt. But the last one was wonderful -- I shot a load on the examining table. I've since wondered if what he did was legitimate or if he was getting some thrills from the treatments, too. He was gay. Who knows? I had a good time and, through the experience, discovered the pleasures of the fuck chute.

[+ purplekow]

Prostatic massage is a legitimate treatment for prostatitis. One wonders though about the need for it on multiple occasions. That sounds as though he was mixing business with pleasure.

[Guest Spanky]

There is a history of prostate issues in my family, so I get checked pretty regularly. I've always wondered what my gay doctor would think if I tried to joke around with him during the exam. You know how it would go "yeah, ah, that's great...no a little to the left, ah yeah, that's the spot...damn, you have any poppers...cmon HARDER...FASTER" but I've never gotten up the nerve to try. It's incredibly puerile, but hey that's just me.

 

As for bottoming, sometimes I stay hard sometimes not. A lot depends on how good the top is and also the position. On my back - usually soft. Doggy - 50/50 hard/soft. Riding - usually hard. Sling - always hard.

[+ purplekow]

There is a history of prostate issues in my family, so I get checked pretty regularly. I've always wondered what my gay doctor would think if I tried to joke around with him during the exam. You know how it would go "yeah, ah, that's great...no a little to the left, ah yeah, that's the spot...damn, you have any poppers...cmon HARDER...FASTER" but I've never gotten up the nerve to try. It's incredibly puerile, but hey that's just me.

 

 

If he is a good doctor, you will be finding another one after that encounter. Now as to whether he will call you for a date later on, that is another matter.

[+ nycman]

Take my word for it.

 

Your doctor gay or straight....will find no humor in your "sexual banter".

[doitb4ugo]

Sling away

 

As for bottoming, sometimes I stay hard sometimes not. A lot depends on how good the top is and also the position. On my back - usually soft. Doggy - 50/50 hard/soft. Riding - usually hard. Sling - always hard.

 

Thanks for the info.....It seems that I just need to keep on keeping on....I don't thnk I can find a sling anywhere but it seems to win the position game. I'll keep looking.....who knows.