General questions

[gcursor]

Hello all..

I have some general questions and have looked high and low for answers so I thought I'd come here for some wisdomly advice.

 

One question I have is can anybody define "overnight"? I mean the hours and all that? It probably varies but a general idea is still good to have.

 

Another question is how would I go about contacting somebody I'm thinking about getting together with. Typically I like email over anything else however what's a good opening message? I mean do you discuss general likes and dislikes. What sort of things should I share about me or do most guys rather not care to hear about the stuff I like until the day of... Also should I try to ask them what they like to do on dates if it's more than an overnight (don't take them to Ballet if they like Blues clubs, etc.) ? Like I said, I'm new so I'm trying to understand some of the "finer" points of this.

 

Also let's say you contact somebody from a website and they don't write back. One guy wrote back after some time saying my email was found in his spam filter. Do I write them again or do I write them off after that? I know that they're all very very busy but if I am talking to somebody about more than an overnight then I thought they'd be much more interested but I guess they don't know me from everybody else either.

 

Finally and this links to the last point a bit. Let's say I contact somebody from a RENTMEN site with a first email and I don't hear anything. Do I assume they're too busy for me and move on? Are we not supposed to write to some of the really hot guys until like 30 years have passed then we might have a shot? (just a joke there...) Maybe wait a few months and write back assuming that my email may have been misplaced?

 

Anyway I'm sorry to lay all these questions out but I really am just trying to understand some of the "finer" points of going about all this. I like to treat everyone I know with respect and common courtesy and I thought this forum in particular may help me with some of these things.

 

thanks,

gcursor

[Kevin Slater]

One question I have is can anybody define "overnight"? I mean the hours and all that?

 

Welcome to the forum.

 

You'll probably get a lot of takes on here as to what an overnight entails; I say the only two that matter is yours and that of the guy you hire. I also suspect it depends on whether you do take him out to dinner and a club or expect to stay in a hotel room the whole time. In any case, I'd follow up with the escort in mind and just be sure the two of you are on the same page.

 

Kevin Slater

[JoeyBryant]

however what's a good opening message? I mean do you discuss general likes and dislikes. What sort of things should I share about me or do most guys rather not care to hear about the stuff I like until the day of...

 

I know that they're all very very busy but if I am talking to somebody about more than an overnight then I thought they'd be much more interested but I guess they don't know me from everybody else either.

 

Finally and this links to the last point a bit. Let's say I contact somebody from a RENTMEN site with a first email and I don't hear anything. Do I assume they're too busy for me and move on?

 

I would say a good opening message would start off as something simple, with maybe just a few physical details about yourself and where you live. Nothing about desires, fetishes or likes and dislikes yet. A date that you want to meet is also fine.

 

Reason why is because if its too long and drawn out at first, we tend to think its 'form mail'. Then we get requests sometimes from Nigerian and British clients wanting to pay us $9,000 for a week. So if you mention anything more than a couple hours on a first email, it may make it harder to differentiate between you; a genuine client and something else. Also, unless we've met the person before, we tend to get a suspicious of anyone offering extended bookings in the first email or call. Those dont often pan out.

 

If you're responding to someone on m4rent on rentmen, make sure a number is posted otherwise it means the ad is expired and they won't deliver the email until the ad is reactivated. How clever

[whipped guy]

Hopefully more escorts will respond here as it would be great to hear more of their views and what ever words of wisdom they might wish to impart, but I want to put in my two cents for what it is worth...

Hello all… I have some general questions and have looked high and low for answers so I thought I'd come here for some wisdomly advice….

Gcurser.. I am not sure if there is much wisdom here on my part, but at times there is no rhyme or reason as to how various guys respond… it will take a bit of perseverance on your part for sure.

Another question is how would I go about contacting somebody I'm thinking about getting together with. Typically I like email…

I prefer to get things in writing. If a guy is willing to commit to something via the printed work there is at least a tangible record of sorts. At least it is better than nothing.

I mean do you discuss general likes and dislikes. What sort of things should I share about me or do most guys rather not care to hear about the stuff I like until the day of...

I find most guys like to know just a few generalities at first… such as your age and a brief indication of when you want to meet, and for how long. If you are into wild stuff and the escort does not overtly advertise such a scene you can say something to the effect that you can go from “mild to wild” and see how he reacts… and get a feel from there. Keep it short and coherent at first. If he responds you can expand as the correspondence evolves.

Also let's say you contact somebody from a website and they don't write back. One guy wrote back after some time saying my email was found in his spam filter…. Let's say I contact somebody from a RENTMEN site with a first email and I don't hear anything…

This happens all the time… If I don’t hear back within a reasonable amount of time… and it is someone in whom I have much interest… I write back saying that, “possibly my email fell through the cracks”… and forward the original correspondence. This allows him to “save face”. If I don’t hear anything after that then I usually give up… as the guy is either not interested or incompetent. As a case in point…this past year I had an incident where an escort never responded to my initial “mild to wild” inquiry. I contacted him several days later… Now I knew that he was alive and well because he was corresponding with a friend of mine… At first I was a bit perturbed. However, he did respond to my “face-saving perhaps it feel through the cracks follow-up” email saying that he had a problem with his outlook email inbox. Now I am not sure if that were actually the case or he just needed a bit of time to think about me and my inquiry… but we clicked from there on. I subsequently got more specific about my “likes” and did so in a forthright, cogent, and easy going manner. Well the rest is history as he is now a current favorite. Moral of the story… never assume a dead end. Though most such scenarios do end up that way… and it is because the escort senses something that he feels would not work or he just does not care or need, or want your business. If such is the case you don’t need him either so he did you a favor… Time to move on!

Anyway I'm sorry to lay all these questions out but I really am just trying to understand some of the "finer" points of going about all this. I like to treat everyone I know with respect and common courtesy and I thought this forum in particular may help me with some of these things…. gcursor

Well! Many of us here have been trying to make sense out of and understand the “finer points’ for years!! At times there is no sense to be made out of any of this nonsense! You are right by acting respectfully… and hopefully the working guy will see that… and that will hopefully make your in queries stand out from some of the other correspondence that he receives. I always write in sentences and paragraphs not in one word sentences or acronyms. Once a time is confirmed, I also always ask how much information they want and when they want to get it. Some can think weeks ahead of time… others only want or need to plan from the day before.

 

It will be hit or miss, and you sometimes have to read through the lines… or rather one word responses and acronyms if that is the guy’s style. However, I usually find that guys who can think and express themselves in sentences in the long run have made better escorts… At least it shows that they have a brain… as opposed to half a brain… and I have always said that the brain is the largest sex organ. An exception to this would be if the guy responds from his blackberry or phone… I then cut him some slack… as I recently did and the guy turned out to have more post graduate degrees than Carter has pills… (I’m not dating myself with that expression… I heard my grandfather use it!)

 

Bottom line… there are no absoltes… Finding an escort is not like finding a dentist… but then again finding a good dentist is not easy either, but at least you are dealing with a regulated profession. This website is the closest thing to 1-800-dentist. So make use of its resources… the reviews and this forum and with any luck, a bit of persistence, research, and study on your part you will hit a bingo in the escorting world. There are quite a few scam artists and incompetent guys out there as this is not a “regulated industry”. Still there are a lot of great individuals working it… but not every great guy will be right for you. The challenge is finding that guy. You seem like you have a decent head on your shoulders and since there needs to be a meeting of the minds… you are already more than halfway there!

[+ newatthis]

You can probably avoid a lot of the tension of not getting responses if you stick, for your first hires (am I right in assuming that you don't have much experience hiring?), with well-reviewed escorts who also seem to be your type physically* and who have a track record of doing well with newbies. IIRC, there is more than one thread here dealing with escorts who are good with new customers.

 

With such an escort, you can keep your initial email short and to the point -- I'm interested in getting together with you, mentioning a date/time or range of dates/times and perhaps where you learned about him. Once you establish contact, you can let him know (I would find this easier to do on the phone than by email) what your particular circumstances are.

 

I could go on with possible next steps, but that depends a lot on the escort and you. The right guy will make this easy.

 

 

*In rereading this before posting, I was reminded that in my experience, even exactly the right physical type is less important than the experience/professionalism factor.

[gcursor]

wow..you guys ARE helpful

 

I want to thank EVERYONE for their GREAT informative responses! I'm still hoping more escorts respond to give their viewpoint but it is VERY VERY nice to get somewhat of a better understanding.

 

Somebody asked me if I'm new to hiring escorts and I guess it shows. It's been quite a long, long time since I've done this? How long? Well wooden dentures were still being used a lot when I last tried this.

 

One other comment..somebody said there are threads that deal with escorts who are especially good at handling newbies. I'm curious to find out where those threads are at. I have started seeing to what length some escorts will go to make your experience memorable. I mean even if it's just sending an email to ask them what they like to do inside and outside the bedroom..that's what is important to me.

 

anyway i'd appreciate it if somebody could mention those threads and I really wanted to thank you all for your time and your very helpful advice.

 

gcursor

[whipped guy]

Well wooden dentures were still being used a lot when I last tried this.

LOL! Nice follow up on my 1-800-dentist comment...

 

At any rate, the whole process is indeed often like pulling teeth!

 

One other comment..somebody said there are threads that deal with escorts who are especially good at handling newbies. I'm curious to find out where those threads are at.

 

Possibly check these out for starters:

http://www.companyofmen.org/showthread.php?t=69772

 

http://www.companyofmen.org/showthread.php?t=69577

 

http://www.companyofmen.org/showthread.php?t=47636

[JT Brooklyn]

Welcome gcursur!

 

Whatever you do spend an "Hour or Two" with whoever you do think you would like to hangout with for an Overniter!

 

The "Honest Working Guys" will tell you whether or not they do well with an Overniter! Not ALL Working Guys are really good at it!