Fin Fang Foom on Trent Foster's Response

[Guest Fin Fang Foom]

Ecorting is not always as glamorous as people may think.

Most people fail to realize that every time an escort enters a strange and

unfamiliar place, they are risking their life with a person they know

nothing about.

 

DRAMA QUEEN ALERT!!!

 

Over time there have been numerous deaths, rapes and unreported beatings

endured by escorts world wide.

 

If these WORLD-WIDE "unreported beatings" are unreported, then how does he know about them?

 

Sometimes an escort may go into a situation with a really bad feeling.

Researched studies have been done on male rape victims showed that a large

percentages felt a bad vibe about the situation before it occurred.

A percentage also claim they had the chance to leave but failed to listen

and see the warning signs as they took place.

 

Not just one study but "studies". What studies are these? The news loves to report salacious "studies" like these - I've never heard a peep about these "studies".

 

When recollecting step by step most victims were able to see the red fags

but didn't know how to react.

 

Unfortunately some of the people in this situation are now dead!.

Sadly, some of these people killed were escorts.

 

Data, please.

 

This is my recollection of the events which occurred.

 

RED FLAG! Anytime someone starts with "this is my recollection" then you can be pretty much assured that what they're going to relate is going to be all back and fill. "He said I said THAT? I don't remember ever saying that!" Not: "He's a big fat liar. I never said that!"

 

This is where he totally took my off guard when his hand shake

became very aggressive.

He even stated in his review that Trent had a " VERY strong grip".

The truth is, his grip was far too aggressive and totally inappropriate for

any situation.

 

Trent Trent Trent, let me help you with this one. To quote Sondheim, "you gotta have a gimmick". Your gimmick Trent, is to have big manly muscles. Did it ever occur to you that that reason he was overdoing the handshake was because he was trying to match/over-match you in strength? If he wanted a girlie handshake, he would have hired a twink. What did you think was going to happen: death by hand-squeezing?

 

He then got overly excited about the matching silver paint of both our

vehicles.....(Very Strange!)

 

Yep! You pegged 'im! He's definitely an ax murderer! Studies have shown that homocidal maniacs are always tipping their hands by finding something stupid in common with the person they have the hots for.

 

I excused myself to the rear of my vehicle in order to obtain the jock strap

which he had requested.

 

Trent, do you really talk like this in person? If you do, then you've given ME the creeps!

 

When I opened the rear, he was at my side with his shoulder touching mine

and peering into the back of my SUV without any respect for my privacy.

At this point I was really beginning to get really worried.

I took a step back and asked him if there was a problem?

He stepped toward me and said "NO....do you have a problem?"

 

Sounds to me like Trent is one of those people who doesn't like his "space invaded". We've all met them. They're the same people who don't look you in the eye while they're talking to you.

 

He did return to his room and I got into my SUV and drove away as fast as I

could.

 

I can smell the burned rubber all the way here.

 

I know he understands exactly what happened because I received his voice

mail which he claimed he didn't mean to freak me out and scare me away.He

also said he wanted to reschedule something for later.

 

We don't know if he used the verb "freak", but if he did, has it occurred to you that maybe he felt that way because you were behaving like you WERE freaked out?

 

Considering all the trouble I went to in order to make a new client happy

 

PUH-LEEZ! You weren't there to make "a new client happy", you were there to make a BUCK! Gimme a fuckin' break! This is the sort of spin I hate - suddenly the guy is Mother Theresa.

 

I was just glad to get out of that situation in one piece.

 

Oh yeah, that was a reeeeeeeeeally dangerous parking lot encounter!

 

If I had stuck to my rules, this would not have happened so I guess I only

have myself to blame.

 

Well, you're right on the blame part. If you had taken that stick out of your ass, you might have been a little more comfortable.

 

I have been on thousands of calls

 

Ok, let's do the math. There are 365 days in a year (I'll ignore Leap Years). Using 2,000 as the goal number since he said "thousands", he would have had to, on average, turned one trick EVERY DAY for 5.479 YEARS. Could I please see a show of hands of those who believe he has accomplished this?

 

I apologize if his intentions were good but put in the same situation and I

would do the same thing again.

 

And again and again and again and again..........

 

This has been a good lesson for me and hopefully it will give people some

kind of idea of what escorts have to face at every new call.

 

Why did I suddenly get a vision of all the orphans singing "It's a Hard Knock Life"?

 

Now me let me tell you what I think really happened.......

 

NiceAndNaughty is, by his own admission, a closet-case. He doesn't have a clue how to behave around fantasy guys so he behaves "inappropriately". By this I mean, he behaves like he THINKS he should behave in a situation like this. He hasn't had enough "gay experience" to just relax. His other review was for Dean Coulter so he's into muscle guys. This tells me that he's into those "hyper-masculine" guys and all the baggage that brings with it - like manly handshakes (snore).

 

NAN gets the hots for Trent. Is excited like a puppy about meeting him. Probably pees a little on the Holiday Inn carpet. Bounds out into the parking lot to meet his muscle hunk and is met by Trent "Even After Thousands Of Calls I'm Still Paranoid About Being An Escort And Don't Like People Invading My Space" Fosters. Since Trent is totally self-absorbed and obviously paranoid, he interprets NAN's behavior as, of course, something sinister. If Trent had been on "thousands" of calls, he would have encountered this personality type hundreds of times before, but, we've done the math, so.....

 

Trent is a drama queen, has issues with himself (ergo: the body), thinks he much smarter and more well-read than he is (more issues about himself). Trent probably 1) wasn't really in the mood, and 2) found the guy completely unattractive so he went on automatic and decided to leave but rationalized his behavior by telling himself that the guy obviously wanted to do something bad to him.

 

Memo to Trent Fosters: You've decided to make money being a whore. That means you're going to be hired by guys you aren't attracted to. If you have a problem with this, then get a real job. Or, be professional and be upfront with the johns and tell them it's just not going to work and that you're very sorry. Don't go peeling out of parking lots like you're a scared little school girl. You obviously want to look like a "man" - now act like one.

 

Helpfully yours,

 

FFF

[Traveller]

F3,

 

Numbers 1 and 2 in the penultimate (awful big word for an 8 year old) paragrpah are, as always, nail and head. Excellent job.

 

Later.

 

PS. The fact that "The Rock" wannabe could even remotely be scared of a client, there being no mention of weapons of any sort, is one big yuck.

[Donnie]

Gee, someone's got a lot of time on his hands. Recently lose your job, Fin Fang?

[Cooper]

I have met Trent Foster several times while at the Gaiety. He appears there just about every 6 weeks. I have always found him to be a fun entertainer on stage, while acting very cordial in the lounge...In appearance, this guy is huge. His legs are like tree trunks and his arms are rock solid...As for the number of clients he sees, he possibly could see 40+ during a 10 day run...So having said this, I was also quite surprised at reading Trent's response...

It's obvious that T.F. could use some good professional advice on how to "drive away" from a client. If, as he say's, he made a call to a friend for assistance, well, his next "get away" call should have been to the client he left hanging at the "H.I". At this time, he could politely say, "Hey, it's not going to work out, sorry". This way the client would know and T.F. wouldn't look like a man on the run with an outrageous response.

[Guest Cweirick]

FFF

Thank you for writing one of the funniest replies I have read- and someone who has the balls to write what some of us were thinking but would never post.....

CHAD

[Guest GldnMuscle]

I've never met Trent Foster and I don't anticipate our path's crossing anytime soon; however, I find his scenario believable and understand his instinct to error on the side of caution. Men when stoked up or drunk can be vicious, controlling, violent bitches and totally disrespectful to others. Trent's experience is no less plausible than the stories of an escort arriving at a "john's" place, demanding money up front, jacking off and taking off, yet we sympathize with the john's experience. I find "Fin Fang Foom's" comments toward Trent degrading, disrespectful, vicious and judiciously bankrupt. Jerry Falwell would be proud.

 

Personally I hire escorts and have had good and mediocre experiences but I've never been disrespectful. You are free to dislike an escort or their performance, but when you refer to them as "whore's" what does that make the "john"? You get what you give.

 

I suggest you work out your internal issues in a more productive way instead of the shallow personal attack that serves no one but the frustrated ego you've currently displayed.

[Guest Fin Fang Foom]

>I find "Fin Fang

>Foom's" comments toward Trent degrading, disrespectful,

>vicious and judiciously bankrupt. Jerry Falwell would be

>proud.

 

I just LOVE making new fans!

 

What the fuck does "judiciously bankrupt" mean in this context? Or did you type it because you thought it sounded erudite? It would have been more clever of you to have continued with the alliteration.

 

>when you

>refer to them as "whore's" what does that make the "john"?

 

Is this a trick question? It makes them a JOHN.

 

If it will help, I'll try to go more s...l...o...w...l...y.

 

S...i...n...c...e...r...e...l...y...y...o...u...r...s,

 

F...F...F

[Rick Munroe]

Unless you've ever escorted, you have no idea what dangers or creepy situations we can be exposed to (just think of Tom Bustone's sliced dick). Yes, Trent was out of line for not just being upfront & telling the client he didn't want to do the job. But you're way more out of line with your nasty review of his rebuttal. The client isn't even as angry as you are. Kind of odd.

[Guest buttlvr]

While FFF's responses to escorts rebuttals rub some people the wrong way, I think many of them are intended to have dark humor.

 

I do think Trent's rebuttal is a bit odd. I mean after talking several times with the client then driving an hour only to get cold feet over a feeling. I don't know what the client looks like but Trent looks like a big boy who can take care of himself. There are some escorts that are small or waif and need to be on their guard, somehow Trent does not strike me that way. Just my two cents.

[Guest Sports]

FFF, two thumbs up, excellent review of Trent Foster's rebuttal. Trent is a drama queen and your memo to Trent is right on target.

Is it possible that Trent has been on thousands of calls?

Memo to Trent part II. (Thousands of calls) times (Trent's going rate) equals (letter from IRS).

Cheers

[tedbear]

>Sometimes an escort may go into a situation with a really

>bad feeling.

>Researched studies have been done on male rape victims

>showed that a large

>percentages felt a bad vibe about the situation before it

>occurred.

>A percentage also claim they had the chance to leave but

>failed to listen

>and see the warning signs as they took place.

>

>Not just one study but "studies". What studies are these?

>The news loves to report salacious "studies" like these -

>I've never heard a peep about these "studies".

>

 

I can't quote any specific study (or studies), FFF, but I can tell you that as a survivor of rape, I definately had very bad vibes before my assault. I don't make excuses for not following my instincts, but I was a naive country kid who had recently moved to the big city and was a bit carried away with the gay life I encountered here.

 

And I can also tell you that a common thread among therapists I've seen and survivor's groups I've attended, ignoring "bad vibes" has not been unusual.

 

Anyone--escort, client, a guy being picked up in the grocery store or in a bar-- should pay attention to what his instincts are telling him. Responding correctly to bad vibes can save you years of pain and expensive therapy. It might even save your life. Is having sex one more time (or earning another couple of hundred bucks) worth the chance?

[Rick Munroe]

>And I can also tell you that a common thread among

>therapists I've seen and survivor's groups I've attended,

>ignoring "bad vibes" has not been unusual.

 

I'm not surprised. It's interesting that in the thread about Tom Bustone's dick-slicing incident, many regular posters here expressed shock, moral support, and anger at what he endured, while others are being critical of Trent's actions. If Tom had gone with his instincts and left the situation, I wonder how supportive the posters here would have been. Are we only to be comforted if we're hurt, and not supported if we obey our feelings? Again...Trent was wrong not to call the client to say he wasn't returning. But to say something like "Trent looks like a big boy who can take care of himself" is really just ignorant. Does anyone here really think muscles can protect you against a knife, a gun, or being ambushed by more than one person? And I don't see how being cautious makes one a "drama queen."

[BuckyXTC]

My vote is with you on this one, Rick.

 

Vibes and concern for one's personal safety clearly outweight the pleasure of a client. And I think this client sounded weird, at least from the way Trent described him.

 

I am a bit puzzled as to why FFF would get his panties in a wad over this review, to the extent he did. Some of his post is humorous, but some of it is appears to be pure exhibitionism.

[+ Unicorn]

My take is that even if TF felt he was in danger, he at least owed the john an explanation. After all, the john didn't exactly assault or even insult him. The john actually seemed quite professional, honest, and non-vindictive in his review. It's difficult to put myself in TF's place. Even if there was something "off" with the meeting (and I didn't read anything too off base in TF's account), there certainly wasn't anything happening which should have precluded giving the john an explanation.

[Guest Fin Fang Foom]

Once again, certain people's personal dislike of me has caused them to stumble past the point I was making.

 

I don't believe for a moment that Trent honestly believed the guy was a true threat.

 

Let's give the class a pop quiz: Please name the three things that Trent said NAN did that caused all his fine-tuned alarms to go off?

 

I'll give you all a moment.

 

(humming to myself)

 

Ok, time's up.

 

The answers are:

1. A handshake that was much too tight.

2. They both had silver cars.

3. His shoulder was touched when he went into the back of his car.

 

These three things, boys and girls, caused Trent to feel he was in imminent danger. So much danger that he left the parking lot "as fast as he could".

 

Gimme a fucking break.

 

Trent didn't want to do it, plain and simple. For him to cover himself in a veil of possible rape and assault is insulting to those who have endured these things.

 

Trent, in my opinion, is a muscle diva who acts as though he is prettier and smarter than he knows he is. Also, he's proven to be a liar - "thousands of calls"! Talk about an inflated sense of who is he!

 

Continually yours,

 

FFF

[Guest brianbb069]

Im with you Rick on this one; you nailed it. Now how about nailing me?

[Rick Munroe]

>Now how about

>nailing me?

 

Get your ass over here right now. I woke up fucking horny as hell. }>

[Guest Thunderbuns]

>The answers are:

>1. A handshake that was much too tight.

>2. They both had silver cars.

>3. His shoulder was touched when he went into the back of

>his car.

>

>These three things, boys and girls, caused Trent to feel he

>was in imminent danger. So much danger that he left the

>parking lot "as fast as he could".

>

>Gimme a fucking break.

 

>Trent, in my opinion, is a muscle diva who acts as though he

>is prettier and smarter than he knows he is.

 

I'm with FFF on this one. Trent is a scene queen.

 

But........ Both vehicles being silver - well now, that is kinda spooky isn't it. It's not as if they were both purple - but silver?

Gosh, I might have to re-think my position here...

 

Thunderbuns

[Rick Munroe]

>But........ Both vehicles being silver - well now, that is

>kinda spooky isn't it. It's not as if they were both purple

>- but silver?

 

Have you ever had a frightening dream that, when you woke up & told someone about it, it sounded silly...not scary at all? This is similar. When you get bad vibes from someone or something, it might not be something that you can easily explain. If we take apart Trent's rebuttal, line by line & out of context, I'm sure the details can seem unimportant. The point is that, for whatever reason, he felt uneasy about this client. Whether his instincts were right or wrong are not important...as tedbear said, is it worth the risk?

[Cooper]

About a year ago, while staying in NYC, I made an appointment to see one of the headless hunks from Rentboy. The escort sounded very pleasant on the phone and the facial description was to my liking...So I thought...Our plans were to meet in the hotel's bar. As I was drinking my diet coke with lemon, in walks this very unattractive man, not dressed to my taste, hair could use some combing, and moved rather awkwardly towards me. This was my headless hunk escort from Rentboy! Needless to say, this was not going to work. However, before telling him this, I asked if he would like a drink. He accepted and we began to talk. He was an educated person, well traveled, enjoyed sports, and had a great sense of humor. Suddendly, I began to see his cute smile, his sensual eyes, and a laugh that lite his face up. I was seeing beyond the "cover". No longer did I want to end this appointment and instead of saying it wasn't going to work, we proceeded to my hotel room and had a wonderful time...

 

To those writers talking about bad vibes and how T.F did the right thing, I will say don't be so harsh to judge a person that you don't even know. T.F. ran out on his appointment, didn't show any courtesy to possibly a very decent man. You escorts want to be treated like professionals, well act like one. Treat the clients in the same way you would like to be treated by us patrons.

[Rick Munroe]

>You escorts want to be treated like professionals, well act like one.

 

I've never said that. I want to be treated like a whore. So...that's how I act.

[Traveller]

F3,

 

These same people are looking for Uzbekis on Prospect Place. Remember, that there's no place for humor or reality checks on this Board. Now, I'm getting ready to get off in another round with today's coverboy. Marco is too much fun.

 

Later.

 

PS. Hoo, look forward to seeing you in NO for Southern Decadence; after my round with Small Town John.

 

PPS. And for God's sake, remember the secret signal; otherwise the Israeli will take us both out.

[Guest Les]

http://www.gamers-forums.com/smilies/contrib/lilly/hmm3grin2orange.gif

 

Another hysterically funny analysis Mr. Foom...Thanks.

The only alternative for her behavior would be temporary paranoia, gee I wonder what causes that?

[Guest JustANametoPlay]

A few things.

 

I am not going to specificaly comment on Trent, as that can be debated ad nausem.

 

However I am interested in two common thoughts that were expressed.

 

First, it has been suggested thathow could Trent be in fear as he is a big muscle boy. The fact is that just because someone is mucular doesn't mean they can protect myself, or someone that isn't as muscular as them couldn't kick thier ass. I have seen a few bar brawls in my day and oddly it is always the big tough guy that ends up on the floor.

 

Bad vibes. Bad vibes are just that, vibes. Anything can create them. Even if it is as mimimal as feeling odd about the way someone shook your hand, thevibe can happen and I always think you trust your vibes.

 

Lastly, Rick you are not a whore, you are a slut :7

[Boston Guy]

I just read the review in question and the response.

 

My first thought is that TF was right to cancel the appointment and leave if he felt threatened or uncomfortable. Gut feelings are things I think we should pay attention to and they often cannot be totally explained. But being street smart is often a matter of listening to gut feelings and paying attention to what they are telling us. Safety is too important to dismiss.

 

My second thought was that he made a big mistake in not calling the client back. He should not have left him waiting in the hotel with no word. A simple "I'm sorry, this won't work for me" would have sufficed.

 

Overall, however, I think the intent of this this thread was to ridicule TF and I think that's inappropriate, for a number of reasons.

 

First, it should not be the policy of this board to ridicule people who take steps to preserve their own personal safety. None of us were there and we don't know exactly what took place in that parking lot. It should be sufficient that TF felt threatened and uncomfortable enough to want to leave immediately after having just driven an hour to get there.

 

Physical size is meaningless in this context. Saying that someone should not feel threatened because they're big is just plain stupid; bigger people are often hurt by smaller people and fear is not related to body size.

 

FFF spends several paragraphs trying to carefully dismantle TF's statements about the dangers of escorting, in a clear attempt to try to set up a case for ridiculing TF's feelings below. Instead of being persuasive, FFF comes across as needling and nitpicking. Worse, the thrust of TF's argument -- that escorting can be dangerous -- is true and FFF tries to dismiss this message through his comments.

 

FFF has been around long enough that he should know better. Escorts are often young guys who start out relatively naively. But the escorts I know say that if you escort long enough, sooner or later you're going to find yourself in a situation where you feel uncomfortable and physically threatened.

 

This may be an unfortunate but necessary consequence of being an escort and constantly meeting unknown men in situations where other people are not present. Regardless, minimizing this risk or trying to dismiss it is neither right nor fair. I've seen many clients take the opposite tack on this board, and share some of the things that they do to try to make a new escort feel comfortable and unthreatened. The only reason FFF seems to take the course he takes is so he can ridicule FFF.

 

I personally know an escort who was drugged by a client, driven to a city 500 miles from his home and kept drugged for more than a week. This escort was only 19 at the time and a terrific young guy. Instead of dismissing the potential dangers of escorting -- for both client and escort -- we should recognize them and concentrate on how people can minimize them. I would suggest that one of the best things people can do is to immediately leave any situation where they feel threatened or uncomfortable. Regardless of whether their feelings are irrational -- and thus, by definition, difficult to explain logically later - or not, people who ignore their gut when it comes to their personal safety are not being wise.

 

FFF finds it necessary to talk about TF's "gimmick". He talks about "girlie handshakes" and "death by hand-shaking". He says "Yep! You pegged 'im! He's definitely an ax murderer! Studies have shown that homocidal maniacs are always tipping their hands by finding something stupid in common with the person they have the hots for.".

 

My reaction to this is that the only person out of line here is FFF.

 

He seems to enjoy demonstrating his analytical prowess by dissecting reviews and responses. One can almost hear him chortle as he finds a new victim. Unfortunately, the one thing he seems to lack is any sense of compassion. It doesn't matter to him -- perhaps it's the point -- that the person he's trying to hold up to ridicule is a real live breathing person who's trying to get through his days just like the rest of us.

 

TF felt threatened and left. He should have called the client and told him that he was leaving. Not doing so was unfair and wrong. Leaving was the right decision if he felt threatened or uncomfortable and none of us has the right to say "you shouldn't have felt threatened." That's about the whole story.

 

If FFF didn't like the facts of the situation -- which, ultimately, were really none of his business since he wasn't either party in this transaction -- he could have simply said so in about three sentences. If he felt TF was wrong, fine -- say so. But writing a long discourse holding someone up to ridicule because they took the steps they felt necessary to preserve their own safety is not only unfair, it's wrong.

 

Do we really want to send a message to escorts everywhere that "if you feel threatened and you leave a situation where you're not comfortable", your name is going to be splashed all over the message board in ridicule?

 

FFF was wrong to post this in this manner. As for those of you who see it as funny when someone else is held up to ridicule, I'd like to ask you to put yourself in TF's position for a few minutes. Leave your anonymity behind. Put your picture up on display. Tell us your city and state and phone number and email address. Then take some actions that you felt were necessary to preserve your safety and let other people ridicule you. Then see how you feel.

 

The anonymity provided by the Internet allows people to ridicule others as they hide behind the skirts of a false identify and made-up screen name. But that doesn't make it right to do.

 

BG

 

Memo to FFF: "Acting like a man" involves showing compassion, understanding and kindness to other people. I suggest you consider the application of at least some of these attributes in future attempts to analyze the private interactions of two other people.