Joey Hart in DC, double no show.

[Guest Esc_Tracker]

From the exchange here, I have to conclude that Joey is either scatter brained (turns his cellphone off and falls asleep two hours before a date, doesn't know his own city, doesn't carry his cell at all times, purges messages before a date is complete, etc.) or lying or both. He is at any rate clearly lacking in a few of the basic social skills necessary to be a good escort (reliability, courtesy, empathy, trust, etc.). Still, he has two cats, and in my book that means he can't be all bad.

 

I don't plan to have any further dealings with him, however, not because I am bitter, but because I don't see any point. He owes me for two nights in a hotel and hasn't been sufficiently gentlemanly to offer any compensation whatsoever, no matter how theoretical (like a free hour on a future two hour appointment next time I am in DC). Such an offer would have cost him nothing and might have gone a long way to clearing the air. As it stands though, he has effectively killed any desire on my part to ever meet him, and obviously he wasn't that anxious to meet me.

 

Writing a bad review that would stick to him when he only has one to his name would be a bit harsh, however, as he finally did offer an explanation of sorts (along the lines of "It's not my fault I'm an idiot") after some arm twisting. I am going to hold off until I see some credible evidence he has treated anyone else the same way. (Someone sent me an anonymous message claiming to have had a similar experience with Joey, but as he offered no details, I am discounting it.)

 

If you live in DC and think he is hot (which he is), consider giving him a try. At least you won't be stuck with a pointless hotel bill like I was, and if he doesn't show up, you won't have lost any money. It's not like he stole anything from me or benefitted in any way from his double no show. He claims it was a pretty bad weekend for him, and I see no reason to doubt it. He lost out on $500 and may have spent a couple of rather stressful hours in traffic (possibly unavoidable under the circumstances) and had his rep damaged as well (definitely avoidable if he had only e-mailed me an apology and explanation).

 

Perhaps he was just unusually clueless that day. Perhaps he has learned something from the experience. Perhaps he is just a jerk. We won't know until he gets more reviews.

[+ Unicorn]

I hope you'll reconsider and write the review. It wasn't just a matter of sleeping past your appointment. He made many bad mistakes in his dealings with you, and his pattern continued in his response to the events. Even if we believe his story about sleeping over the telephone ringing (if he was that tired, think of how your appointment would have gone--not that I necessarily believe his story), he states he called you back once and that the line was busy. Well, if the line was busy (1) he knew you were there, and that it was just a matter of calling you back in a few minutes, and (2) in most hotels, at least, you would have received a message indicator as soon as you hung up (you'll have to tell us if yours did).

The next day, not only did he not write to you to apologize (and perhaps even offer ammends?), but he ignored the e-mail you sent him!! If that isn't the height of rudeness and lack of empathy... Even after he screwed up the second time, he still ignored your e-mail messages, writing in his response that he didn't think anything he'd say would help. If he had one iota of sensitivity, he'd know that an apology at a minimum (let alone compensation) would have gone a long way.

Even after this issue was publicized here, he's unable to show almost any remorse for his actions. All he can say is "I don't need this escort money. If you don't like me, I don't care. I'm a nice guy, and, darn it, people like me." He reminds me of that Dan Smiley guy on the old Saturday Night Live.

This site relies on honest reviews so that clients can make wise choices when hiring escorts. If we only write the positive experiences, this site loses its value. The escort clearly showed a persistent pattern of irresponsibility and insensitivity to your feelings. You can help a fellow client out by telling of your experience. At least out-of-towners should be wary. If he really was just having a bad week-end (which it doesn't sound like from his response), he'll eventually get more good reviews.

[Guest BigJosh]

Excellent response and observation. In my book, the only thing worse than a complete rip-off hustler are these no-show flakes. Even if you don't travel to another city as Esc_Tracker did, you generally get all horned up and wait for some hot fun and then are completely left hanging when some guy who decides he's too tired to carry through with his commitments.

 

Joey's response is lame and it's clear he is in the wrong business. I hate to say it, but just as the escort does not care to hear all about a client's personal life, clients do not really care if an escort has shown great "personal growth" over the past year. I mean, come on, Joey, you're not a twink. You've been an escort for a while and you have a long history in porn. Stop with the adolescent needy attitude and admit you really fucked up with esc_tracker. You obviously need to get over some of this egotistical self-absorption. Also, if you continue to charge high rates, you should also behaving like a professional (whatever your line of work). I always suspect that if someone behaves in a non-professional way as a hustler, he usually behaves the same way in whatever other more legal line of work he has.

 

Joey still owes E_T an apology, and he needs a map of our nation's capital.

[Guest Esc_Tracker]

>I hope you'll reconsider and write the review. It wasn't

>just a matter of sleeping past your appointment. He made

>many bad mistakes in his dealings with you, and his pattern

>continued in his response to the events. Even if we believe

>his story about sleeping over the telephone ringing (if he

>was that tired, think of how your appointment would have

>gone--not that I necessarily believe his story), he states

>he called you back once and that the line was busy.

>Well, if the line was busy (1) he knew you were there, and

>that it was just a matter of calling you back in a few

>minutes, and (2) in most hotels, at least, you would have

>received a message indicator as soon as you hung up (you'll

>have to tell us if yours did).

 

To be fair to Joey, when he did call at about 21:00 (two hours after our scheduled date) he got a busy signal because I was calling him one last time. When I hung up I noticed the flashing light and called him back immediately and we finally made contact. For the record he did apologize. What he does not appear to understand, however, (or hadn't by the time I last heard form him, i.e. his post above) is that there is a conventional social protocol which responsible people follow when they screw up. The proper response is "I screwed up. Let me make it up to you." For Joey is was "I screwed up. I'm sorry, but deal with it."

 

If I sense a pattern here, it's a tendency on his part to run away from unpleasant situations and a failure to assume responsibility. When you screw up, you don't just leave other people holding the bag. You step up and take the hit, or at least offer to. Sure, some people will be hard and make you pay. But as often as not they'll appreciate a genuine sign of remorse and let you off. It's their choice, however, and not yours.

 

It's hard to psychoanalyse someone without ever having met him, but from what I can piece together from his website, his interviews and what I have read of him, Joey appears to be trying to get a grip on who he is and his place in life. He appears to have self-image problems that he is trying to grapple while at the same time trying to deal with complex financial and personal dificulties.

 

I hope he finds himself soon as he does have a lot going for him: great looks of course (he is much handsomer now than during his porn carreer, a testimony to good grooming and consistent workouts. His web site and taste in music also testify to an artistic and creative temperament. His obvious parental but non-cloying affection for his cats is to his credit as it shows that he is not completely egocentric. There is a brittle something there, however, that does not bring out the best in him when confronted with adversity.

 

>The next day, not only did he not write to you to apologize

>(and perhaps even offer ammends?), but he ignored the e-mail

>you sent him!! If that isn't the height of rudeness and

>lack of empathy... Even after he screwed up the second

>time, he still ignored your e-mail messages, writing in his

>response that he didn't think anything he'd say would help.

 

I didn't send him a second e-mail for him to not respond to. When he was an hour late for our rescheduled date I called his cell and left a message telling him that I was checking out and to turn back, which he claims he did. I *expected* an e-mail explanation for his second no show and didn't get one, but I didn't ask for one.

 

>If he had one iota of sensitivity, he'd know that an apology

>at a minimum (let alone compensation) would have gone a long

>way.

>Even after this issue was publicized here, he's unable to

>show almost any remorse for his actions. All he can say is

>"I don't need this escort money. If you don't like me, I

>don't care. I'm a nice guy, and, darn it, people like me."

>He reminds me of that Dan Smiley guy on the old Saturday

>Night Live.

 

>This site relies on honest reviews so that clients can make

>wise choices when hiring escorts. If we only write the

>positive experiences, this site loses its value. The escort

>clearly showed a persistent pattern of irresponsibility and

>insensitivity to your feelings. You can help a fellow

>client out by telling of your experience. At least

>out-of-towners should be wary. If he really was just having

>a bad week-end (which it doesn't sound like from his

>response), he'll eventually get more good reviews.

 

This isn't about revenge. Joey is obviously not a thief, a fraud or dangerous. If I can believe his webcam, he doesn't misrepresent his looks or, from the comments I have heard from others, his services. If someone is willing to come forward on this message board and state credibly that Joey has done similar things to him, then we will have evidence that he is a serial flake and wasn't just having a "sociopathetic" episode with me. Under those circumstances I will post my review. Keep in mind that his not spontaneously offering an apology and explanation has already probably proven to be the most expensive e-mail he has failed to send. By my count he has lost at least $1000 in business as a result. A negative review would just be piling it on at this point. If he learns from the experience and changes his attitude, the review will have done him more harm than it will have served potential clients.

 

Joey, if you are still following this thread, let me ofer you a few pointers on how you can make the best of this part time escorting thing.

 

1. Drop the 15 minute charges. I know Talvin does it too, but it's insulting to the client. You are contracted for a specific period of time. At the end of that time, if you arrived on time, didn't waste any time bending your client's ear with your personal problems, and performed as expected, you are free to leave. If the client wants you to stay, offer another hour if this is agreable to you, but don't take out a stopwatch and start counting the seconds.

 

2. Some clients are jerks. But most aren't, and you never have to deal with the jerks more than once if you don't want to. So don't treat your clients as jerks. You are the one who missed our earlier appointment. It is just plain arrogance on your part to assume that I am going to be late for our rescheduled date and to refuse to leave your place until I have returned your call. If I were so boorish as to be late without calling you, we would, at worst, be even. To act the way you did testifies to your expectation that people are *normally* jerks. This may come as a shocking surprise to you, but no client likes to feel his escort thinks of him as a jerk.

 

3. Escorting is a *service* industry. It's about pleasing people and making them happy they saw you and gave you money. I know an escort in London (Alex#2) who always sends me "morning after" messages telling me how much he appreciated our date and the present I brought him (normally a wine bottle), asking me how I am, etc.. He sends me brief but personalized holiday messages, just in case I might forget him. It's hokei I admit, but trust me, it works. I can't imagine going to London without seeing him.

 

4. Escorting may not be you life, but it is something you have chosen to do at least part time, whether to reinforce your self-esteem or to pay the bills. Do it well, in the same way you would want to do anything well. And the key to doing it well is not to arrive on time and put out (though that certainly helps). It's making the client want to see you again. Govern your behaviour accordingly and keep in mind that you have *no* track record with a first time client. If you completely screw up the first time, you are kissing hundreds of future $$$ goodbye. So learn contrition and how to make lemonade from lemons life hands you.