Escort reviews======dealing with escorts' personalities

[Guest stry]

I have read a number of escort reviews where the client will go all out praising the personality of the escort. Some go so far as to claim that the escort and he have become "friends". Granted, I have been with some very hot escorts from Premier in Philly. They were excellent in bed and great conversationalists. But, my concern is this. Are we as clients not wrong when we allow this fantasy to become reality. Take the money aspect away and see how sexy and how friendly these very same guys are. Not to condemn any escorts, but--guys, wake up and smell the coffee beans!!!!! It's all about the level of acting. This is a business, and we should never lose sight of that. Yes, go and have a great time. But calling them "friends" , except for during the session for which they are getting paid to be just THAT , is a bit far fetched.

[Guest Tampa Yankee]

It's all in the eye of the beholder... as are generalizations.

 

There are very few constants (fundamental truths) in nature. Those that are found are ususally referred to as physical laws -- even science hedges on them at the quantum level to where everything reduces. Human behavior and emotions do not follow natural laws. People overreach in their relationships all the time, it's bound to happen with escorts too. (This is a generalization.) That does not mean it always happens. Very few statements are always true... mine and your's included.

 

:-)

[guyinsf]

I'm all for NOT encouraging delusions, but perhaps your personal experience has caused you to believe that friendships NEVER develop between escorts and clients when, in fact, they sometimes do.

 

Here's a general description of my relationship with one escort. I'll let you decide whether you think this qualifies as a friendship: I have seen him a couple of times over the past year just to have coffee or dinner and chat; no money exchanged, and I didn't pay for his dinner. I got a nice birthday card and gift from him. When I achieved a goal after a long, hard road, he helped me celebrate taking me out to dinner (and paying). Those are just some tangible indications that we are friends, I think. The quality of our interaction also speaks to this, I believe, but I don't know how to describe it in writing.

 

I'm not saying we're "best friends." I imagine that if I stopped hiring him, I would certainly not see him very often; then again, we live hundreds of miles apart. I guess that I could also cynically view the gestures described above as his "cost of doing business," that he is merely investing some of his money to keep getting hired by me. But I know that doesn't explain this situation because the guy has plenty of other clients and could quite easily do without my small financial contribution to his livelihood.

 

I also should state that of the 20-40 guys I've hired (I stopped counting), he is the only one with whom I've developed this kind of relationship. While some of the other guys have been "friendly" during my sessions with them (and others have been surprisingly unfriendly!), I don't interpret that as anything other than a general pleasantness on their part.

[Will]

As always (OK, that's a generalization), TY is right. Whatever the situation, human beings are human beings. I would guess that most escorts are rather outgoing, gregarious types; otherwise they wouldn't want to go into this line of work and they wouldn't stay in it very long if they did. And, as TY reminds us, all sorts of relationships qualify as "friendships," even professional ones. For example, when I see my doctor about six times a year, she and I hug and talk about our families, and when I leave we hug each other again. I genuinely love her, and she genuinely loves me. But we never see each other socially; and if it weren't for the professional relationship, I doubt that we'd be hugging.

 

So it is with people whom I am paid to see professionally. I develop intensely close relationships with some of them, relationships in which the love of friends is definitely a part. But when they no longer need my services, neither they nor I go to any lengths to keep up. Should we happen into each other, it's wonderful; and should we not, well, we both have fond memories.

 

These are just two examples of the many kinds of people in my life for whom I have enormous affection, and who apparently feel the same way for me. And in each case, a professional relationship not only precipitated the friendship, the friendship is coterminal with the professional relationship.

 

And that is the way it is with "my" escorts. What they think about me is none of my business. What I think of them is a matter of very great importance to me, and in three cases I can say that I harbor sincere affection and friendship for those men, whether I ever see them again or not. And would also say that I would not presume to telephone any one of them on the off chance that he might want to hang out for the evening. Why shift the ground when it's stable?

 

Being realistic is not the same thing as being cynical. And being friends does not presuppose obligations or the freedom to intrude on another person's life.

[marc anthony]

Stry: For the most part you are correct. Most of the escorts I hire are really nice and friendly to me because they are paid to do so. And once we part ways, I often think about them, but I am fairly certain they do not think much about me. I understand that.

 

But I can guarantee you that two escort relationships I have developed are NOT that way. We really have become friends, and believe me, I am not delusional. One relationship in particular has become very close. We do not live in the same state, but this boy will call me for advice on everything from school to investments. I call him when I just want to talk to him, and he is always happy to chat. When I visit his city, I do pay him for sex, but we also go out almost everyday I am there to dinner, shows, just to sit around in his house. Once on my birthday, he hired a cute escort boy for a 3-way because he knew he was my type... and of course, he himself performed for free and paid for the other boy.

 

The other relationship I mentioned is slightly different. I don't stay in touch with that boy as often, but we have each stayed at each other's homes when visiting each other's city... off the clock. No business transactions in those visits. And I know that we would both be there for each other in a crunch.

 

So whereas you are correct in your assumptions in most instances, it is not correct to say that it can never happen.

[Guest Tampa Yankee]

Will,

 

Your kind words notwithstanding...

 

I have never seen my thoughts and feelings on escorts and friendship better captured than in your post above. It goes straight to the heart of the matter for me. Thanks for putting it together in such a clear and penetrating form. Everyone should be able to grasp this even if they don't agree that the world moves that way for them.

[Guest ItalianLover]

I 've read with interest your post , and i agree completely.

 

Though i've something i';d like to share and also ask your advice and opinion..

 

I've met an escort that does not live in my city just two times. After that he has always been kind , e-mailing and asking how i was , and when we were going to meet again. Yes this is good p.r for his business , but he went so far as saying he would charge me only 50% of his usual rate for the weekend , saying that he really enjoys our time together.

 

Well, this made me think , and knowing that our is a "business relations" also made me think about his genuine feelings.

 

So , what do you think ?

 

I'd appreciate your feed back

 

ItalianLover

[Guest pickwick]

Some of the confusion may arise from the fact that different people have different definitions of the word "friend." Personally, I do not regard someone as a "friend" with whom I have only a business relationship, no matter how positive the results of that relationship may be. If we are not part of each other's personal lives then we are not "friends" to my way of thinking. Nor do I regard someone as a "friend" simply on the basis of my feelings for him. If there are not strong indications that my feelings are reciprocated, the mutuality I consider necessary to such a relationship doesn't exist.

 

Someone I know who lived in Eastern Europe many years ago once found himself in a situation in which he had to leave the country to avoid arrest. There was a brief period of time before he got out in which the authorities were looking for him and he could not go home. He once told me that as a result of this experience his definition of "friend" was based on one question: "Would he hide me?" By that standard I think that most of us have very few real friends.

[Losgatan]

>I have never seen my thoughts

>and feelings on escorts and

>friendship better captured than in

>your post above. It goes

>straight to the heart of

>the matter for me.

>Thanks for putting it together

>in such a clear and

>penetrating form.

 

I couldn't agree more. We've been around this topic so many times that it's hard to believe there was anything more to say about it.

 

But Will's post finally captures the heart of the matter.

 

Thanks!

[mmk]

I think that that is wonderful. I am sure that there are quite a few escorts who will get in touch with their regular clients just to say hi, how is it going even if they have no intention pursuing a "business transaction" What is so hard to believe that just because a person is an escort that they cannot have true genuine feelings. Would an escort who called to see how you are doing or saw you on the street and stopped to chat for a few minutes be any different than if you saw you favorite bartender or waiter or your doctor, etc and they stopped to chat for a few minutes? I think not. These people are not looking for business 24/7 so why should we believe that an escort is. If the escort turned away and did not acknowledge me, then that is what would make me question them as to whether I would want to get together with that person again. If they are only able to associate with me when they are giving me money and not any other time then that action alone speaks about their demeanor and manner. Now I am not expecting to become blood brothers with any escort I have ever been with or even to get on their Holiday card list, but acknowledging someone outside of your usual meeting enviroment does say alot for that person. I think that we might tend to get a little jaded when thinking of escorts that they are all about money and that we are JUST dollar bills to them whereas in some cases, that is proabably very untrue.

[Guest cp8036]

Or, ask "would you help me move?"

[Guest JT]

Will and TY, very well said indeed. Thank you. :-) Like guyinsf said, "I'm all for NOT encouraging delusions". However, I think there are clients out there who are experienced and intelligent enough to tell the difference between "acting" and "real". When I recently praised the personality of an escort in a review, it is not because I was delusional or I was in a fantasy world. I have been with my share of escorts, most of them are fun, outgoing and great in bed. Many of them are good or even great conversationalists. But do those qualities alone make them an individual with great personality? Maybe or maybe not, I guess, depending on our own definition of "great personality". Whether we become friends with anyone (escorts and non-escorts) are something so personal that I don't think I'm in any position to tell others what's right or wrong for them. Some might question people (not necessarily escorts) who try to "befriend" the rich (for their money and influence), the young and beautiful (for sex), etc. whether their friendship is real or acting? But ultimately it's the individual who will have to make his own decisions, based on his own experiences, wisdom and instincts.

 

What I can say is that when an escort is willing to confide in me and share something very personal about his life with me, I know it is not acting. It's definitely not necessary and it's beyond what a "business" transaction would require. For that I'm grateful to their trust and honesty.

 

 

JT

[Guest creosote]

>Some of the confusion may arise

>from the fact that different

>people have different definitions of

>the word "friend."

 

Good point. A lot of people these days use words like friendship and love very casually and use them to refer to feelings and relationships that are ephemeral and without any great significance in their lives.