Dealing With A Bad Situation.....

[Guest ChubbyTopGuy]

Hey Guys,

What can be done when you've had a "escort" (I use the term loosely here, con-artist would be better) over to your home, or hotelroom. (This, has only happened to me in a hotelroom, I don't have anyone over to my house, until I know them VERY WELL)... The guy gets there, asks for the money upfront, (I know, a 95.5 % red light warning) and he doesn't come through, stalls, pretends to get ready for action, but doesn't deliver, or even flips out (i.e.: gets violent) on you? Well, what can one do?

 

Try, and reason with him to get your money back?

Call hotel security?

Try and fight back?

 

What?

[Guest regulation]

Nothing

 

Once you've made the mistake of paying the entire fee up front, there is nothing you can do. Hotel security may help you eject someone from your room if he refuses to leave, but they are not going to force him to give you what you claim is money you paid him for sex that he refused to deliver. Neither will the cops. What did you think?

 

With an escort you've never seen before, payment arrangements are something you should cover when making the appointment. A simple way of dealing with the situation is to tell him at that time "I usually pay 25% up front," and see what he says. If he demands the entire amount up front either when making the appointment or when he shows up, cancel immediately. If he accepts 25% and then refuses to perform, at least you've limited your loss (provided the rest of your money is in a safe place, which it should be).

[Guest BeefyDad]

RE: Nothing

 

As a client I too hate to get ripped off, but to say asking for money up front is always a warning sign just isn't being fair to escorts in general.

I have befriended many over the years, and have heard countless horror stories when escorts don't collect in advance. Here are just a few stories I have heard, I am sure there are many other variations:

 

1-Clients who "discover" they have no cash after end of session.

2-Clients who pay with bad checks

3-Clients who just flat out refuse to pay, stating the escort misunderstood things.

4-Clients who try to re-negotiate activities in mid session.

5-Clients who offer less than the agreed on price.

6-Clients who suddenly "discover" at the end of the session that they thought the hourly rate covered all night, or many hours.

7-Clients who just flat out refuse to pay afterwards.

8-Clients who say they are way too cute to have to pay, and thought the escort knew they weren't serious and in fact thought the esocrt viewed the session as a freebie.

 

The list is endless, but this should give you a idea of the crap most of these kids have to suffer through. I always offer the money in advance to someone I have never seen before, as I know this puts them at ease. Even Matt Adams says the same thing in his book titled "Hustlers, Escorts and Porn Stars". On page 211 of the first edition, he states. "Typically an escort will ask for their money up front with a first time client. The top escorts will expect payment at the end of a appointment with repeat clients"

 

I try to screen the people I see by at least making sure they have a ad, and hopefully a web page. This at least minimizes the risks of getting completely ripped off like "ChubbyTopGuy" was.

You have to use common sense a bit with escorts, and it sounds to me like Mr ChubbyTopGuy may have picked up street trade off the street or bar.

 

We as clients have the luxury of screening escorts by many ways, but they have no way of screening us. I know of no review site for screening clients, and know of no client that puts up a web site for himself. So unless a escort is seeing you as a referral from another escort, he knows nothing about you and I don't blame them a bit for asking for payment in advance.

 

On a rather comical side note, which to me illustrates how useless many reviews here are, consider the following story. Several months ago I saw one of the top rated escorts here with many positive reviews. Naturally I didn't want to insult him by offering the money up front, but to put his mind at ease since he didn't know me, I put the money in plain sight on a dresser.

 

I was quite surprised when he immediately put it in his pocket before undressing. I was extremely horny, and his oral skills got me off in under 5 minutes even though I asked him to go slow.

After I climaxed, he jumped up and got dressed. What about the rest of the hour I asked? "Honey you already cummed, another cumm will cost you $200 more" he replied. He had no interest in staying longer for massage or to talk, as he explained he only does that until someone cumms.

 

So on a night like that, I would just as soon have not paid up front, In general I don't like to pay first, but completely understand the shit these kids have to suffer through with idiots so I do understand where they are coming from.

[Guest escortwatch]

RE: Nothing

 

>As a client I too hate

>to get ripped off, but

>to say asking for money

>up front is always a

>warning sign just isn't being

>fair to escorts in general.

Actually it is a huge red stop sign!

>

>I have befriended many over the

>years, and have heard countless

>horror stories when escorts don't

>collect in advance. Here are

>just a few stories I

>have heard, I am sure

>there are many other variations:

>

(Snip a bunch of poor advice)

 

In fact I think this posters screen name "nothing" is pretty much what is offered here.

 

Do not pay for any service with an escort upfront, unless you ahve agreed to this prior to the escort arriving.

 

If an escort is being honest than that escort should have no concern about being paid.

 

The escort has the advantage as many clients are married, or in the closet while the majority of escorts are at the least openly gay.

 

Thus, the escort would not hesitate calling the police if there was a problem. Knowing how to get around the sex issue v. fee for time issue. While this would be rare for an escort to do I know of situations where it has happened.

 

If an escort doesn't get paid for a proper reason it is unfair though the cost of doing business. People write bad checks, why would an escort accept one? Also, credit cards (not even mentioned in Nothing's post) can be charged back thus the escort loses his fee.

 

Any escort who asks me for any money upfront I explain very plainly that I pay after our session. If they protest I politely ask that they leave. In 20 years of hiring escorts not one has left, not a single one.

 

Do clients rip off escorts from time to time, sure. Is it right, not at all. YET, more often than not a clent is the victim of the escort, as Nothing was during his experience in New York.

 

Now if you haven't paid an esocrt upfront and there are problems straight off, don't try to work them out, it won't get better (yes there are exceptions to everything) simply pick up the phone and call the police. That escort will leave very quickly.

 

I remember remember reading a review here recently where a client ran into problems with an escort I believe it was in Orange County, California. The gist is the client paid some money.. got punched by the escort. I do not understand why the client did not take further action, at least he did not note any in his review.

 

People do not need to put up with abuse from escorts. And escorts should be treated with respect.

[HooBoy]

RE: Expectations

 

>Several

>months ago I saw one

>of the top rated escorts

>here with many positive reviews.

>Naturally I didn't want to

>insult him by offering the

>money up front, but to

>put his mind at ease

>since he didn't know me,

>I put the money in

>plain sight on a dresser.

>

>I was quite surprised when he

>immediately put it in his

>pocket before undressing. I was

>extremely horny, and his oral

>skills got me off in

>under 5 minutes even though

>I asked him to go

>slow.

>After I climaxed, he jumped up

>and got dressed. What about

>the rest of the hour

>I asked? "Honey you already

>cummed, another cumm will cost

>you $200 more" he replied.

>He had no interest in

>staying longer for massage or

>to talk, as he explained

>he only does that until

>someone cumms.

 

I always make it clear that I want my full time and in that time I expect to come to orgasm at least three times an hour.

 

My record is 17 times in a night and I do not

mince words about it or allow them to get away because I got off. However, I let them know in advance that a one time spurt ain't gonna cut it.

 

How many good times are ruined because of lack of communication?

 

Comments from escorts?

 

HooBoy

Email: HooBoy@male4malescorts.com

[Guest Tampa Yankee]

RE: Expectations

 

>

>I always make it clear that

>I want my full time

>and in that time I

>expect to come to orgasm

>at least three times an

>hour.

>

>My record is 17 times in

>a night ...

 

What a mensch!! :-) You are going to have to donate yourself to science so the rest of us can find out the secret!!

[Guest albinorat]

>Hey Guys,

>

> What

>can be done when you've

>had a "escort" gets

>there, asks for the money

>upfront, (I know, a 95.5

>% red light warning) and

>he doesn't come through, stalls,

>pretends to get ready for

>action, but doesn't deliver,

>or even flips out (i.e.:

>gets violent) on you? Well,

>what can one do?

>

 

This does sound like a street trade scam to me and is fairly typical. Usually the guy asks for less than you think then once at your place increases the price, demands it up front, never gets into anything, or stops early on to demand more money or simply acts weird or violent and runs out with the money.

 

I think you have to have a certain tolerance for this risk in order to enjoy street (or even bar)people. Some really do deliver (even when you pay them up front) but many will do as little for as much as possible. And some will just essentially mug you. They count on your not wanting to be embarrassed in the hotel or getting your neighbors involved if you do take them home. And of course they will try to scare you.

 

Unless you can face the guy down if he does get rough, you pay.

 

Usually escorts such as reviewed here do not ask for payment in advance. Sometimes when someone does, and they seem honest to me, I show them I have the money and I put it where we both can see it. Usually that's enough if they've been burned by clients saying they don't have the cash, offering checks, etc. If it's not enough for them, I ask them to leave.

 

Since I live in an urban neighborhood in NY close to everything, I only offer money to leave if someone has travelled a ways to get to me.

 

They don't always leave graciously but I always settle this issue right away. I insist on talking with the escort for at least ten minutes, before any clothes come off and before any kind of intimate contact. It's enough to get the vibe. If that vibe is wrong, the bed action will be too, I've found. And it's arguably less fair to try and cancel a session once something has started and there's been intimacy then if you can say, "you know, you're really hot, but I'm not into it. Sorry", before the belt has even been unbuckled.

 

However, if you can't afford to lose the money and shrug, I think you need to be careful about any escort. Even the good ones may not be in the mood, or your cup of tea when it gets right down to it.

 

Some perfectly professional escorts operate by wanting to get the client off (once) as fast as possible with as little involvement of themselves as possble. Again that's more typical of people on the street or escorts in big cities with beepers and cell phones -- it maximizes the number of appointments they can take in a night.

 

However, when that has happened to me, I noted there are places where you can get off quick, either for free or for as little as twenty bucks, and they're playing more or less a cheap whore's trick.

 

But the best you can do then, I believe, is never see that person again and perhaps post a warning here.

 

There's no point in being sentimental; this can be a shady business and not all escorts (or clients) are fair and honest. There's risk on both sides.

 

Al

[Guest regulation]

RE: Nothing

 

>As a client I too hate

>to get ripped off, but

>to say asking for money

>up front is always a

>warning sign just isn't being

>fair to escorts in general.

>

 

When I negotiate a business arrangement with an escort or anyone else, I'm concerned about seeing that MY needs are met. Seeing that HIS needs are met is his responsibility.

 

 

Even Matt

>Adams says the same thing

>in his book titled "Hustlers,

>Escorts and Porn Stars".

 

 

A client looking to Matt Adams for advice about hiring escorts is like a consumer asking a car salesman, "Which car do you think I should buy?"

 

>We as clients have the luxury

>of screening escorts by many

>ways, but they have no

>way of screening us.

 

On the other hand, there is no question about the value of what clients are offering: money. There is always a question about the value of what an escort is offering. An escort may have a good reputation, but a reputation may be unjustified -- as you found out, judging by your example below. Or he may be having a bad day and be unable to perform. But the value of money is always exactly the same. An escort takes the risk that a client will not pay, but if he is paid there is no risk concerning the value of what he gets. A client takes the risk that the escort will not perform, and the risk that if he does the performance will not be as advertised.

 

 

>After I climaxed, he jumped up

>and got dressed. What about

>the rest of the hour

>I asked? "Honey you already

>cummed, another cumm will cost

>you $200 more" he replied.

>He had no interest in

>staying longer for massage or

>to talk, as he explained

>he only does that until

>someone cumms.

 

You referred to this as "comical." If you think it's funny to be cheated, your sense of humor is quite different from mine. Your experience argues against your own position on this issue.

 

In all the years I have followed the policy I recommended to the author of this thread, the only reactions I have ever had are that the escort either has accepted the up front percentage I offered or assured me that no up front money was necessary. So much for Matt Adams.

[+ Charlie]

I have one basic rule: I only hire an escort who has a place of his own where we can do it the first time. The kind of behavior you mention almost never happens in that situation, because he doesn't want to take the chance that you will cause a disturbance that gets the attention of his neighbors (the reverse of your fear of making a disturbance in the hotel or your home), nor that you will try to get back at him later, since you know where to find him. The only exceptions I make are for escorts with whom I have had enough previous experience to trust them, or occasionally with an unknown escort from a service with which I have a lot of experience.

 

If you are not willing to protect yourself in this way, then you have to accept that your escort experiences will involve some degree of risk.

[+ deej]

RE: Nothing

 

>1-Clients who "discover" they have no

>cash after end of session.

>2-Clients who pay with bad checks

>3-Clients who just flat out refuse

>to pay, stating the escort

>misunderstood things.

>4-Clients who try to re-negotiate activities

>in mid session.

>5-Clients who offer less than the

>agreed on price.

>6-Clients who suddenly "discover" at the

>end of the session that

>they thought the hourly rate

>covered all night, or many

>hours.

>7-Clients who just flat out refuse

>to pay afterwards.

>8-Clients who say they are way

>too cute to have to

>pay, and thought the escort

>knew they weren't serious and

>in fact thought the esocrt

>viewed the session as a

>freebie.

 

I too have heard these stories. If the guy comes well-recommended I'm not the slightest bit hesitant about paying up front the first time. Even if they don't ask for the money up front, it's always sitting out in plain sight when they arrive.

 

Even the top escorts get stiffed. The guy I was with Friday told me of a client that ripped him off not only for the fee but for his hotel cost as well. Having been ripped off like that (and recently, and it wasn't a 1st time client!), I could understand his wanting the money up front.

 

He certainly did right by me!

 

>In general I don't like

>to pay first, but completely

>understand the shit these kids

>have to suffer through with

>idiots so I do understand

>where they are coming from.

 

I can't believe how stupid some men can be when hiring escorts. They're human beings, not show ponies. If you're careful about who you hire, they'll treat you well if you treat them well. Unfortunately, there's very little courtesy from most clients from what I've heard.

 

I *have* been ripped off before and chalk it up to my bad judgement. That's why I generally stick to the "top shelf" escorts these days.

[Matt_Vancouver]

RE: Expectations

 

Ok now I know I have to meet you!!!

One question Hoo, if an escort does this full time, and does several overnights in a week, if there is a client like you, 17times a night, when does the escort get to sleep?

just a question.

Matt

http://go.to/mattsplace

matt_escort@yahoo.com

[HooBoy]

RE: Expectations

 

>Ok now I know I have

>to meet you!!!

>One question Hoo, if an escort

>does this full time, and

>does several overnights in a

>week, if there is a

>client like you, 17times a

>night, when does the escort

>get to sleep?

 

Hi Matt,

That was my record - when I was young, dumb and full of cum.

 

Nowadays, three or four times an evening is sufficient and I like to sleep, too.

 

Hey, I'm already planning a meeting with you. You just don't know it. ;-)

 

HooBoy

Email: HooBoy@male4malescorts.com

[Matt_Vancouver]

RE: Expectations

 

I don't beleive you!: )

So you can't cum 17 times a night anymore? DAMN!

matt

http://go.to/mattsplace

matt_escort@yahoo.com

[Guest Merlin]

To respond to the original question, when the escort gets your money and refuses to perform, you should, in my opinion, forget about the money and try to get him out the door ASAP. Such an escort is not going to be pursuaded to give the money back, and the situation can only get nastier and perhaps violent. Even if you pursuade him to perorm, it won't be much fun. I think the same rule applies as in gambling: don't risk more than you can afford to lose.

[Traveller]

LAST EDITED ON Sep-25-00 AT 11:26AM (EST)[p]How many times does it have to be said. Never, ever, ever pay a fee before the services are rendered. This is not a hard concept to grasp.

 

Later.