Do you worry about escorting impacting your future?

[Damascene]

With the Larry Craig/Ted Haggard/Trent Lott scandals happening, do escorts worry that when you leave the business that escorting could come out at a bad time?

 

I ran across a reference to an escort I used to see (whose real name I know) as the partner of an openly gay man running for a local office? I wondered if Adam (his working name 10 years ago) worry that his past might impact his partners' campaign?

[bobchitown]

Speaking as a client, I've noticed that some seem more concerned than others. I've been known to google an escort's phone number and once in awhile it pulls up links to pages for an established businessman (realtor in one case that I remember). Its clearly the same person from the pix, so not just a reused number. I would think that getting a different phone number would be a reasonable first step toward keeping parts of your life separate.

[MIKEY08]

You raise an interesting point.

 

However, it is a very personal and private issue and no one right answer to this: My personal feeling is this; and I speak of course solely from the perspective of an active escort, as I am one: This practice, while not the best, is not uncommon, especially if one is using a phone #, a cell phone #, that is blocked as to one being able to be identified by name; yet, essentially, yes, if you are using a single phone #, cell phone # or otherwise, for multiple purposes (meaning any of the following: professional, occupational, business, personal, etc.), you do assume the risk as to multiple potential consequences (including but not limited to contact from law enforcement or risk of a loss of a professional state license).

 

The bottom line is this: Even if the phone thing was not of concern, this is how the world is: One's private or secret life can always come to the surface and be displayed to friends, family, and/or other foreseen and unforeseen parties. As the song goes: "It's a small world after all."

 

MIKEY

[seaboy4hire]

With the advancement of technology I don't think there is really much protection in privacy. Think about it really where every you go you are being filmed, pay with a debit or credit card your name and card number is being electronically transmitted, go online and buy something and check your email box and maybe snail mail box and check out all the fancy glossed adverts you get. I am sure there are more examples but those are the ones that come to the top of my head. So really either if one escorts, hires or leads a "normal" everyday life (what ever that is) our movements are being monitored more and more everyday. But to answer your question specifically about escorting and worrying that someone finds out I could give a rip if they do. I have a strong suspesion that some of the gays I worked with at my last company knew what I did but I didn't really care if they knew or not.

 

Hugs,

Greg

seaboy4hire@yahoo.com

http://seaboy4hire.tripod.com http://www.daddysreviews.com/newest.php?who=greg_seattle

http://img182.imageshack.us/img182/6707/lebec084a9ad147f620acd5ps8.jpg

I'm feeling restless. Where should I travel to?

[MIKEY08]

I think you are on to something with that comment, Greg: It definitely is a very impersonal age that we live in with all of the modern technology, etc. The irony of life in South Florida, where I am, is that the attitudes of the masses is pretty much this: One can do whatever one wants, within certain limits of course, so long as one is not going out and about making public announcements of this. When you have a strong and liberal gay community supporting gay businesses in the area and gay politicians and even a primarily-gay populated city, all of which is in SE FLA, there is a degree of freedom: Yes, it is not ideal advertising in a local gay publication or otherwise with an ad that has your phone # or other info that identifies one to the public, but sometimes at least in view of the above factors I guess there is a sense that one can get away with that without fear of consequences: What the reality is as to this I cannot say, yet I will say that the outcome likely varies from one individual case to another.

 

Take care.

 

Mikey

[Guest zipperzone]

>With the Larry Craig/Ted Haggard/Trent Lott scandals

>happening, do escorts worry that when you leave the business

>that escorting could come out at a bad time?

 

One way to avoid the problem is to be a 1st class escort, operate a well run business, be prudent with you income, invest wisely, pay your taxes and make enough fucking $$$ that when you quit the business you are fixed for life and can retire without a second thought as to any possible consequences if your "naughty past" should ever surface. That way you don't have to give a rat's ass, so to speak.

 

Some manage to do it, so it ain't impossible....

[KMEM]

Two points:

 

There is so much information available about every one of us today that I believe you can maintain a modicum of anonymity just because of that fact. We are in perhaps dozens of identifiable groups that have nothing to do with being gay or our work, etc. Just because you might be prominent in a gay community or society does not mean you are noticed by anyone else.

 

I think it very difficult to retire from escorting with enough money to not have to work at something again. Making 100 or 200 thousand a year in a high maintenance job where every day hundreds of dollars are spent on you and the life style your clients do or would like to maintain. Living this life many days of the month makes it difficult to eat noodles and live in a rat hole during your off work days. So, even if you intend to save money and invest it and are not generally a spend thrift, one does become used to living at a certain level and that level cannot be supported on what one can save and invest. The earning years are generally too short. Naturally, there are likely a small number of exceptions to what I wrote. Good on them.

 

Best regards,

 

KMEM

[hansv]

Also speaking as a client, I would strongly advice every escort to protect his identity if he wants to get a job in a different type of business. Many companies use Google to find out if something is "wrong" with the potential new employee. Also it is at the moment very common to check references. So be aware what you mention in your cv.

 

As a client I really don't want to know the real identity of the escort. If it would be discovered, he could never accuse me about that. I tell the escort about me what I think is enough to protect my identity, and I accept that he does the same. I will mention that it is possible to have a good conversation about several topics without knowing each others real identity.

 

Be careful, a lot of people are liberal but sadly more people aren't.

[Guest josephga]

for me i never gave it much thought lol. most of my massage clients know my first and last name. i use my same phone number for everything. and my mother and friends know what i do...

[Guest zipperzone]

>I think it very difficult to retire from escorting with enough

>money to not have to work at something again. Making 100 or

>200 thousand a year in a high maintenance job where every day

>hundreds of dollars are spent on you and the life style your

>clients do or would like to maintain. Living this life many

>days of the month makes it difficult to eat noodles and live

>in a rat hole during your off work days.

 

There is a whole range of levels between living the high life and living in a rat hole. You make it sound much more cut & dried than is the reality.

 

>So, even if you

>intend to save money and invest it and are not generally a

>spend thrift, one does become used to living at a certain

>level and that level cannot be supported on what one can save

>and invest. The earning years are generally too short.

 

To accomplish early retirement one must be careful but that does not mean miserly.

 

For example, transportation is a must. What's wrong with driving a 2 year old Honda Civic? The foolish ones think only a Porche will fit their image.

 

A neat and tidy appearance is essential. So what's wrong with shopping at the Gap? Do you really need Prada and Armani?

 

Put aside a portion of your income to invest wisely. Real Estate is probably one of the best investments as it can provide you with a rental income that will eventually pay of the mortgage for you. An escort with several paid for rental properties, the income on which eventually become retirement income for him can have it made.

 

And even although there are dips in the Real Estate market, in the long run there will be considerable appreciation which can be used to leverage your way into even more properties.

 

I'm not saying it's easy - and a strong discipline is required. But it is do-able and the rewards are fantastic (as in being able to retire before age 40)

>Naturally, there are likely a small number of exceptions to

>what I wrote. Good on them.

[KMEM]

Zip,

 

I suppose I took your "high class" to mean doing trips and over nights without many hourlies. Of course, high class can mean any number of different things to different people. But, to move in certain circles one must dress and act appropriately to the surroundings. Not trying to be elitist here but expanding upon a point. An executive once told me, dress to the job to which you aspire, rather than the one you have.

 

Let's take 100,000 income for a US citizen. Approximately 38,000 will be income and SS taxes. A used car driven 12,000 miles a year will cost 8,000. Modest rent another 8,000 (or even a lot more). A very modest budget for food would be 7500 with, say, 1200 for clothes. This gets you to 37,000 with nothing for movies, TV, eating out, alcohol, etc. I realize one can do without those things but it is difficult to do so and even more so when one night you are eating filet and sleeping in a 300 per night hotel room and the next you are eating tuna fish in your modest apartment.

 

I realize there are a tremendous amount of variables but my point is that it is not easy for anyone to accomplish this life style, never mind being young, inexperienced in budgeting and wanting "things" that you have the money in your pocket to buy.

 

Here is something that I have told other folks before. Assume you are 30 years old. Someone offers you 1 million USD under the following conditions: You cannot earn another penny beyond what the million dollars brings in. You cannot lose one penny of the million dollars. You must pay all taxes and live on the income for the rest of your life. Would you accept?

 

Perhaps some would and make a go of it but they will not live the life believed to be the due of a "millionaire".

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[Guest zipperzone]

>Zip,

 

>Let's take 100,000 income for a US citizen. Approximately

>38,000 will be income and SS taxes. A used car driven 12,000

>miles a year will cost 8,000. Modest rent another 8,000 (or

>even a lot more). A very modest budget for food would be 7500

>with, say, 1200 for clothes. This gets you to 37,000 with

>nothing for movies, TV, eating out, alcohol, etc.

 

OK - I understand your scenario, but lets suppose the $100,000 is $200,000 (not impossible for a dedicated escort to achieve) - see how the whole picture can change? And the extra money must be invested wisely which my vehicle of choice would be Real Estate.

 

>I realize there are a tremendous amount of variables but my

>point is that it is not easy for anyone to accomplish this

>life style, never mind being young, inexperienced in budgeting

>and wanting "things" that you have the money in your pocket to

>buy.

 

It takes disipline, no doubt about it. But disipline is usually what makes one person more successful financially than the next.

 

>Here is something that I have told other folks before. Assume

>you are 30 years old. Someone offers you 1 million USD under

>the following conditions: You cannot earn another penny beyond

>what the million dollars brings in. You cannot lose one penny

>of the million dollars. You must pay all taxes and live on

>the income for the rest of your life. Would you accept?

 

Hell no. If I can't loose one penny, it severly limits my options and I would probably not be able to earn much more than 4% - can't live on that.

 

>Perhaps some would and make a go of it but they will not live

>the life believed to be the due of a "millionaire".

 

But the person I am describing is an entrepreneur and the scenario you describe above is not one that would allow him to thrive.

 

I guess I feel strongly about gaining financial stability because I see so many people, earning very respectable saleries, and still living from paycheck to paycheck. I have one friend in particular who earns about 75K. He never has a cent in his jeans, his cards are usually maxed out and he is constantly robbing Peter to pay Paul. I try and show him where he goes wrong, but he just doesn't get it. He is in Starbucks at least twice a day for a large latte. 2 X $4 X 30 = $240 a month of after tax income - it's practically a car payment! He thinks nothing of picking up a $95 T shirt on his lunch hour (which he needs like a hole in the head as he has dozens at home) - the list just goes on an on. He'll probably be a renter for the rest of his life unless he meets someone with more sense and settles down - probably ain't going to happen. God knows what his FICO score is, and here he is earning a wage that many have to raise a family on.

 

I know, I know, it's none of my business, but I get depressed when I think of how good his life could be.

 

OK - rant over.

[KMEM]

Zip,

 

I agree with your sentiments. It is lamentable that folks who are doing well financially do not make the most of their opportunity. But, it is a fact of humanity.

 

I would like to point out one statistical example that might be enlightening to some. To make 200,000 at 200 an hour, let's be generous and say 250 an hour to allow for tips or charging more than 200 per hour. That results in 800 clients for 1 hour or some dereviation thereof. 800 client hours = 2.19 client hours per 365 days per year. 800 client hours = 3.2 client for 1 hour for 250 days per year which is 50 weeks x 5 days. 200,000 dollars per year at 1000 per day = 200 client days. That means that 4 out of 7 days must be filled by someone willing to pay 1000 for each of those days. Some do this; some may do this easily.

 

Romance or sex reduced to statistics sucks, don't you think?

 

I know you like to have the last word so your next one will be honored or so I plan.

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[MIKEY08]

We sometimes have certain fantasies, in large part because they often are better than the reality.

 

However, what you are describing is the reality for solely a very highly-select few.

 

This is not to say that the rest of us necessarily envy the above "few". Rather, what I want you to understand is that it is very easy to begin in one's twenties as a much-in-demand go-go-dancer or such and then decades later find that you are still in the industry, past forty but beautiful and continuing still to work either as an escort and/or erotic masseur; and just plain trying to survive as best you can. Most of us simply cannot burn all bridges, so to speak, with the rest of the world, in large part because of financial considerations. Besides all of that, many of us have friends and/or relations; and in most cases we cannot risk alienating them or involving them in things that may have consequences for us (legal, etc.).

 

Interestingly enough, I was confronted with the issue of "small world" today when one of my clients, one seeing me for the first time, turned out to have a professional credential and career involvement in a field that I formerly was involved in when I had worked for the federal government. Though it was tempting to consider letting him know of this common tie, I did not want him to incorrectly believe this: that because he was, as he had related, in a supervisory capacity in his position I would somehow "persuade" him to consider hiring me to do a regular job not very different from what I had once done. I now believe that there is a lot more at risk than him just saying "no" or being offended by an employment-solicitation from me and that is under his domain: For one thing I could have unforeseen repercussions to me that have to do with parts of my past that overlap with the future and it certainly would likely shatter by sense of privacy as to my work in the industry and as to parts of my personal life that I keep private from others close to me.

 

Life goes on; and one cannot sit idle and do nothing. I choose to make the best of the reality that is my reality; and if that means for me sacrificing the delusion of a future that entails luxury and/or a comfortable existence for myself, so be it.

 

To very young individuals who have big dreams and all kinds of noble aspirations, I would say this: The industry I am in is not for you. Stay safe and pursue dreams that truly will bring you a bright and happy and safe and secure future.

 

Mikey

[+ purplekow]

>>

>Let's take 100,000 income for a US citizen. Approximately

>38,000 will be income and SS taxes. A used car driven 12,000

>miles a year will cost 8,000. Modest rent another 8,000 (or

>even a lot more). A very modest budget for food would be 7500

>with, say, 1200 for clothes. This gets you to 37,000 with

>nothing for movies, TV, eating out, alcohol, etc. >>

>

I assume that this income is not that of an escort. If so, I would guess that most of the guys are not up to date on their state, federal taxes and SS taxes and that a hundred thousand will go a lot longer when you are not helping to fill that bottomless bucket.

I am wondering if the government ever had the imagination to legalize prostitution, how many guys could not afford to stay in business if they did indeed have to pay all those taxes. I also realize that some of the guys do pay part or all of their taxes by naming income as coming from personal modelling so as to avoid the very real penalties for tax evasion.

 

I have never seen a purplekow;

I never hope to see one;

I can tell you anyhow;

I'd rather see than be one

 

Help there is a purplekow in my mirror

[KMEM]

Purplekow,

 

I thought that I was responding to the stated conditions as outlined by Zip of paying taxes, etc. Would or could you please expand your comments on those taxes are surely not those of an escort. I am not naive or trying to trap anyone. I am not a federal agent of any description. If you mean, surely they are not paying all those taxes even if owed, please state that. If you mean something else, I would be very interested to know what that might be.

 

Again, not pointing any fingers or making spurious commentary, but merely trying to understand what you are saying.

 

Thanks.

 

Best regards,

 

KMEM

[Steven_Draker]

> Do you worry about escorting impacting your future?

 

I would only worry if I was a male hooker and a school teacher in NYC at the same time ! :-)

 

http://www.aidslifecycle.org/1554

 

http://www.aidslifecycle.org/images/alc5_logo.gif

[Guest josephga]

people sometimes ask me if i worry about people finding out that i do sensual massages. i tell them i don't plan on running for president anytime soon lol. my mother knows, friends know. no one else really matters. when i quit in the next few years ill just change my number drop my ads and move on..

[Guest TorontoJared]

As for me, I don't worry about escorting having an unpleasant affect upon my future. If I wasn't escorting, I wouldn't be able to afford university. I wouldn't be able to afford to get my degree at an excellent school and therefor wouldn't have a chance at even getting the kind of future that my degree will give me the chance to achieve. I grant that the fact that I escorted may someday surface at an inopportune moment, but had I never been an escort I wouldn't have half the opportunities for growth, learning, etc that I have.

 

When first beginning escorting I weighed the possibilities and decided that the reasons to escort were far greater than the reasons not to do it. I would have been very unhappy and felt unfulfilled not to be studying at university or having to have worked at a job and saved for years to afford to attend. I also wanted to go to a university that I truly wished to attend, not a community college.

 

I know that I may run into problems someday but I also know that without escorting my future would have been a lot bleaker than it is now. I feel that escorting has greatly improved my future prospects. If it does end up rearing its head at a time when I don't want, I consider that the price that was necessary in order to achieve what I wished.

[Rod Hagen]

I wrote on this re: another unfortunate escort:

 

http://www.advocate.com/letters_detail_ektid29365.asp

 

Escort's response to "escort" article

 

Traditional Texas Chile manages to be simultaneously spicy and predictable. The peppers make it pop, but the texture and flavorings-cumin, onions, oregano, and beer-seldom vary. You know what you're in for. Kind of like The Advocate's April 11, 2006, cover story.

 

Their reportage of Texas political hopeless Tom Malin's tale of the inescapable evils of gay, adult, consensual, well-paid prostitution went down so familiarly (abused as a child, desperate for validation, then cash, then drugs, then redemption) it was almost comfort food. The fact that he lost his candidacy (and, presumably, a lot of contributor's cash) when his not-so-distant past punched its way into the present, as it's wont to do, just gave it a little kick.

 

What was surprising, although maybe not entirely given the magazine's current insipid (non-)agenda, was the laziness of reporting by B. Steele and S. Kennedy.

 

Who did they interview to counter-balance the swelling, sucking, eddy of despair Malin presented? Happy long-term hookers with no history of abuse, drugs, emotional-neediness, or sexual mania? Nope. Sadly, that guy was unavailable and, presumably, deluded anyway. Instead they opted for the younger Dustin, recently self-rescued off that same doomed path "so many young gay men" stray onto. (So desperate were Dustin's circumstances as a prostitute that he lacked even basic furniture in his New York apartment, opting instead to sit upon a lockbox containing "$20,000 in cash.")

 

From where did B.S. and S.K. extrapolate (badly) their numbers? The US Department of Health? The National Task Force on Prostitution? Nope. Since "no verifiable statistics exist" they turned to plucky entrepreneur Tom Weise, giving him, inexplicably, some free advertising with a link and a nod.

 

And, now this is my favorite, they chose a psychotherapist as best suited to profile us; albeit obliquely. I'm guessing every phrenologist was busy doing bumps?

 

It's a shoddy bit of journalism, more apropos of The New York Post and unimaginable during Judy Wieder's years manning The Advocate's helm. For shame.

 

Rod Hagen

Los Angeles

[+ Lucky]

Rod, I remember reading this when you first posted it. It's a wonderfully intelligent response to their article. I wonder if they ever replied to you.

[Rod Hagen]

Thanks!