How do you overcome an addiction to sex?

[Rudynate]

2 hours ago, Peter Eater said:

Believe what you wish. (Some believe the Earth is flat, or that a sky god is watching everything you do.) All addictions are compulsive behaviors. Sex addiction also involves physical dependency, namely on endorphins, released in the brain during and immediately after sexual release. Endorphin release alters mood. 

Yes, they alter mood. That’s what they are supposed to do. In fact, everyone is “addicted” to endorphin-it is a neurotransmitter without which a person’s nervous system cannot function properly. 
 

Nowhere near the same as an externally supplied substance such as alcohol or Vicodin 

[Peter Eater]

5 hours ago, Rudynate said:

Yes, they alter mood. That’s what they are supposed to do

Indeed. And no, not everyone is addicted to endorphins. That’s just silly.

[+ Unicorn]

17 minutes ago, Peter Eater said:

Indeed. And no, not everyone is addicted to endorphins. That’s just silly.

No, but almost everyone (certainly males) has a strong natural drive to have sex. Not having a sex drive is pathological--and certainly outside the norm. This is different from substance addiction. The drive to seek sexual activity is like the drive to seek out water and food. It's natural and biological. Again, while obsession, addiction, and dependence are related, they are not synonymous terms. 

[Peter Eater]

On 3/16/2023 at 4:43 PM, Unicorn said:

No, but almost everyone (certainly males) has a strong natural drive to have sex. Not having a sex drive is pathological--and certainly outside the norm. This is different from substance addiction. The drive to seek sexual activity is like the drive to seek out water and food. It's natural and biological. Again, while obsession, addiction, and dependence are related, they are not synonymous terms. 

Sorry, but this makes no sense. A sexual pathology is like the drive to seek out water and food? A pathology is an illness, and last time I looked having lunch did not present as disease.

[+ Unicorn]

2 hours ago, Peter Eater said:

Sorry, but this makes no sense. A sexual pathology is like the drive to seek out water and food? A pathology is an illness, and last time I looked having lunch did not present as disease.

I think you missed the point. A strong interest in sex isn't pathological. It's normal (for men). 

[Monarchy79]

On 3/16/2023 at 7:43 PM, Unicorn said:

 The drive to seek sexual activity is like the drive to seek out water and food.

Fleece Johnson would agree….

 

[caramelsub]

I know that having an appetite for sex is healthy. But I think the question is if porn and hiring escorts is different from having casual sex with a partner. I feel like I need porn as a visual and aural stimulation to be able to masturbate. It may be considered an addiction. Only one therapist I had talked to told me I should just masturbate in bed without watching porn. She said watching porn is an addiction. She also told me I should stop hiring escorts as well. She didn’t say sex was an addiction. She encouraged me to go to gay bars and date, but not pay for sexual encounters. I may be addicted to hiring, because all my extra money goes to having sexual encounters, which could be used for other things. 

[+ Unicorn]

2 hours ago, caramelsub said:

I know that having an appetite for sex is healthy. But I think the question is if porn and hiring escorts is different from having casual sex with a partner. I feel like I need porn as a visual and aural stimulation to be able to masturbate. It may be considered an addiction. Only one therapist I had talked to told me I should just masturbate in bed without watching porn. She said watching porn is an addiction. She also told me I should stop hiring escorts as well. She didn’t say sex was an addiction. She encouraged me to go to gay bars and date, but not pay for sexual encounters. I may be addicted to hiring, because all my extra money goes to having sexual encounters, which could be used for other things. 

What that therapist said was stupid, judgmental, and unhelpful. That being said, if hiring escorts is putting a financial strain on you, it does represent an addiction.

https://www.mentalhelp.net/addiction/

"Definition of addiction: Addiction is repeated involvement with a substance or activity, despite the substantial harm it now causes, because that involvement was (and may continue to be) pleasurable and/or valuable."

Watching porn, however, is essentially free and harmless. It could serve as a good substitute for hiring, which seems to be resulting in a financial burden for you. 

[Peter Eater]

19 hours ago, Unicorn said:

I think you missed the point. A strong interest in sex isn't pathological. It's normal (for men). 

Naw. The topic is sex addiction, not "a strong interest in sex." Being a drunk is not the same as "a strong interest in cocktails." 

Edited March 20, 2023 by Peter Eater

[Marc in Calif]

22 hours ago, Peter Eater said:

Sorry, but this makes no sense. A sexual pathology is like the drive to seek out water and food? A pathology is an illness, and last time I looked having lunch did not present as disease.

I think you need to read more carefully. What Unicorn wrote is that the lack of a sex drive is pathological. Why? It's considered to be a disorder and dysfunction by medical professionals.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20434725/

[Peter Eater]

4 minutes ago, Marc in Calif said:

I think you need to read more carefully. What Unicorn wrote is that the lack of a sex drive is pathological. Why? It's considered to be a disorder and dysfunction by medical professionals.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20434725/

You might want to go back and read the whole thread.

Sex addiction is a pathological response to a mood altering experience, I insist. That's what Unicorn disagrees with, although none too convincingly. 

[+ Unicorn]

6 hours ago, Peter Eater said:

Naw. The topic is sex addiction, not "a strong interest in sex." Being a drunk is not the same as "a strong interest in cocktails." 

Pretty silly comparison. Obviously, drinking too much puts one in an altered (and dangerous) state. This does not happen from watching (or even jacking off to) a lot of porn. And that's only short-term. Drinking more than 3 drinks a day (especially more than 5) also results in serious adverse health consequences. This does not happen with watching porn a lot (or even jacking off a lot). Does this happen to you after you watch a lot of porn?

[Marc in Calif]

6 hours ago, Peter Eater said:

You might want to go back and read the whole thread.

Read the entire thread. I was responding to a very specific sentence you wrote that wasn't about sex addiction at all:

"Sorry, but this makes no sense. A sexual pathology is like the drive to seek out water and food? A pathology is an illness, and last time I looked having lunch did not present as disease."

You were responding to — and misinterpreting — Unicorn, who had written:

"Not having a sex drive is pathological--and certainly outside the norm. This is different from substance addiction. The drive to seek sexual activity is like the drive to seek out water and food. It's natural and biological. Again, while obsession, addiction, and dependence are related, they are not synonymous terms." 

Edited March 21, 2023 by Marc in Calif

[Peter Eater]

12 hours ago, Unicorn said:

Pretty silly comparison. Obviously, drinking too much puts one in an altered (and dangerous) state. This does not happen from watching (or even jacking off to) a lot of porn. And that's only short-term. Drinking more than 3 drinks a day (especially more than 5) also results in serious adverse health consequences. This does not happen with watching porn a lot (or even jacking off a lot). Does this happen to you after you watch a lot of porn?

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