not booking super hot

[arnemgreeves]

this applies more to women, since i think i'm bi and see both male and female escorts. i have an admitted bias against women who are super hot, they tend to be bitchy and entitled and maybe there is a genetic link there, i dunno. is it acceptable not to book super hot escorts since they tend to be bitches and bad people, and they'd demand good treatment, but not recognise the client is a human too? i don't need to see any super hot lady, and they don't need to see me, so it's a win-win. 

[+ DynamicUno]

The question "is it acceptable to not book ____ escorts because ..." isn't answerable by anyone else but you. 

You are free to decide whatever criteria you wish to choose a provider, even if it is based on prejudiced assumptions.  It may say more about your character than theirs in reality, but it's better for the provider if you don't engage them starting out with a negative frame of mind.

Obviously, it would not be acceptable to treat these people poorly based on your biases.  You're just not obligated to engage them.  

 

[arnemgreeves]

7 hours ago, DynamicUno said:

The question "is it acceptable to not book ____ escorts because ..." isn't answerable by anyone else but you. 

You are free to decide whatever criteria you wish to choose a provider, even if it is based on prejudiced assumptions.  It may say more about your character than theirs in reality, but it's better for the provider if you don't engage them starting out with a negative frame of mind.

Obviously, it would not be acceptable to treat these people poorly based on your biases.  You're just not obligated to engage them.  

 

that's fair enough. we all have biases though. like most gays are highly lookist, so it matches.

[jeezifonly]

It’s also possible that a super attractive escort who can’t perform “kindness” on the clock is just a shitty escort. 

[arnemgreeves]

35 minutes ago, jeezifonly said:

It’s also possible that a super attractive escort who can’t perform “kindness” on the clock is just a shitty escort. 

Decency and hotness don’t often align but that’s just me.

[pubic_assistance]

On 11/16/2022 at 2:09 PM, arnemgreeves said:

is it acceptable not to book super hot escorts since they tend to be bitches

It's completely acceptable to book whomever you like, based on whatever internal bias you have based on past experiences.

On the subject of "super hot"...I tend to agree, that the majority of super hot gay men throw around a lot of attitude.

I can't imagine wanting to PAY for someone to make you feel inferior. But as mentioned here, a SKILLED provider is responsible for making you feel good, including feeling desirable.

[+ DrownedBoy]

In my experience as a client, it's been extremely easy to check if "really hot guys" are jerks or not.

If they ask for double the going rate, they're obviously too arrogant for me to get along with.

[Jamie21]

18 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

It's completely acceptable to book whomever you like, based on whatever internal bias you have based on past experiences.

On the subject of "super hot"...I tend to agree, that the majority of super hot gay men throw around a lot of attitude.

I can't imagine wanting to PAY for someone to make you feel inferior. But as mentioned here, a SKILLED provider is responsible for making you feel good, including feeling desirable.

Interestingly some people do like to pay to be made to feel inferior, and payment is part of that ritual. It manifests itself sometimes when clients book a cuckold session where I massage etc their partner while the cuckold watches. He’s not allowed to participate (unless invited) and just has to watch his partner enjoy themselves with me. It’s a kind of humiliation, and I’ve noticed is usually requested by guys with small cocks.

I’ve done a few sessions like that but I kind of don’t feel comfortable with the scene. Plus it’s difficult to arrange because I insist on the person being massaged providing written consent so that there’s no coercion going on. Both parties to the session have to be wanting it because often the whole scene is something that just the cuckold is into and their partner is either unaware or unwilling. The guy calls me to arrange it and when I ask “does your partner know?” they say “oh no I want it as a surprise for him/her” or they say they’ll tell them once it’s booked. I say to them I need to speak to the partner before booking and of course after that it never actually gets booked.

If both are definitely into it then fine I’m happy to help but I generally prefer to make the client feel great, desirable and sexy than create a vibe where one person feels diminished, even if that’s actually what they asked for! 
 

[pubic_assistance]

8 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

I've done a few sessions like that but I kind of don’t feel comfortable with the scene

Well...I don't blame you.

Reinforcing a person's insecurities through role play is dangerous territory.

A skilled BDSM professional is like a psychologist who knows some tricks to circle people back to a positive experience through traveling a person's fears in a sexual environment.

If you don't KNOW the psychology behind BDSM work, then you stand to cause additional emotional damage by taking the client through painful experiences without knowing how to circle them back to a place of healing.

[Jamie21]

7 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said:

Well...I don't blame you.

Reinforcing a person's insecurities through role play is dangerous territory.

A skilled BDSM professional is like a psychologist who knows some tricks to circle people back to a positive experience through traveling a person's fears in a sexual environment.

If you don't KNOW the psychology behind BDSM work, then you stand to cause additional emotional damage by taking the client through painful experiences without knowing how to circle them back to a place of healing.

Yes that’s a great point. I think though that any kind of sex work, not just bdsm stuff, involves managing the client’s emotional state as well as their physical needs. It’s helping people explore their fantasies and therefore involves some elements of trying to understand what’s going on in their head. 

[dbar123]

In my limited experience super hot people don’t kiss, fuck or blow any better than average guys. The average guys are usually better at conversation.

It may be nice to feel a muscular body but it actually makes me feel better to spend time with someone closer to my own ground state 

[jawjateck]

I have never noticed a meaningful difference in performance, kindness, or attitude among the hot models as compared to average fellas. I stopped hiring the models a long time ago for longer, multi-night meetings. Their body is a brand and requires a lot of maintenance, which they do not pause for even a day or two. So, all that gym time, skin/face care, six meals a day, personal massage, etc etc is hard for a regular guy like me to accommodate. 

[arnemgreeves]

21 hours ago, jawjateck said:

I have never noticed a meaningful difference in performance, kindness, or attitude among the hot models as compared to average fellas. I stopped hiring the models a long time ago for longer, multi-night meetings. Their body is a brand and requires a lot of maintenance, which they do not pause for even a day or two. So, all that gym time, skin/face care, six meals a day, personal massage, etc etc is hard for a regular guy like me to accommodate. 

It's just i think hot escorts are scummy people because they're hot. there is a genetic link between that and being a shit, so i avoid them. 

may seem "harsh" and "bigoted" but we all have negative views of some groups. 

[+ KensingtonHomo]

13 hours ago, arnemgreeves said:

It's just i think hot escorts are scummy people because they're hot. there is a genetic link between that and being a shit, so i avoid them. 

may seem "harsh" and "bigoted" but we all have negative views of some groups. 

Attitudes are not genetically determined. And hotness is culturally and historically defined, and on top of that, everyone has their own subjective tastes. 

We're hired guys who others would consider extremely hot and some wouldn't. I'm generally not that into the guys who get endless threads of people panting over them. I have a few specific types, and since we hire together they also have to be to my husband's tastes. And generally, that is a guy in his 30s or 40s (maybe late 20s, but usually not) who is fit but not ripped (and fit can include bears), who is vers, personable, funny, and can be dom but doesn't have to be. In some ways, they're harder to find then a pretty 20-something who's going expect his beauty go get our coins. 

[+ DrownedBoy]

On 11/25/2022 at 3:37 AM, arnemgreeves said:

It's just i think hot escorts are scummy people because they're hot. there is a genetic link between that and being a shit, so i avoid them. 

may seem "harsh" and "bigoted" but we all have negative views of some groups. 

Not all of them are jerks.

I've meet a handful who charged reasonable rates and were very nice and personable when we met.

However, I've also met hot guys who, when I texted them, acted like I should be honored that they're willing to grant me an audience. I don't need that.

Generally, the following statements in an RM ad are a red flag:

• enjoys the "finer things in life"
• is "exclusive and won't accept lowball offers"
• "FinDom." Enough said.
• looking for someone "to invest in their business"
• "looking for a Sugar Daddy"
• has "a very busy schedule" or "limited availability"
• only does outcalls in "5 star hotels"
• AND OF COURSE:  "Check out my OnlyFans site!"

[Jamie21]

57 minutes ago, DrownedBoy said:

Not all of them are jerks.

I've meet a handful who charged reasonable rates and were very nice and personable when we met.

However, I've also met hot guys who, when I texted them, acted like I should be honored that they're willing to grant me an audience. I don't need that.

Generally, the following statements in an RM ad are a red flag:

• enjoys the "finer things in life"
• is "exclusive and won't accept lowball offers"
• "FinDom." Enough said.
• looking for someone "to invest in their business"
• "looking for a Sugar Daddy"
• has "a very busy schedule" or "limited availability"
• only does outcalls in "5 star hotels"
• AND OF COURSE:  "Check out my OnlyFans site!"

Oh! I was going down that list thinking:

yep, ‘finer things’ ugh pretentious..

’exclusive’ ….yep, I read excluding..

’Findom’…oh yes, total wankers! 

’invest in business’…lol it’s not a tech start up, it’s your ass. Agree.

’sugar daddy’….ugh yes I agree…fund my lifestyle because I’m too lazy to. 

’very busy schedule’ yes! he’s obviously always at the gym or in front of a mirror.

’5 star hotels only’ well ….maybe…I do have some sympathy, I’d not visit a client in a Premier Inn tbh (UK budget hotel chain). It’s easier to get in a 5 star too (I know how to walk in as if I own the place 😂)……..

….and then I got to ‘check out my Onlyfans’ and I thought oh!!! But then I though, no, it’s ok because I’m on justforfans - which is a much better platform.

Check out my Justforfans (link below)😂😂😂

[arnemgreeves]

On 11/25/2022 at 11:33 PM, KensingtonHomo said:

Attitudes are not genetically determined. And hotness is culturally and historically defined, and on top of that, everyone has their own subjective tastes. 

We're hired guys who others would consider extremely hot and some wouldn't. I'm generally not that into the guys who get endless threads of people panting over them. I have a few specific types, and since we hire together they also have to be to my husband's tastes. And generally, that is a guy in his 30s or 40s (maybe late 20s, but usually not) who is fit but not ripped (and fit can include bears), who is vers, personable, funny, and can be dom but doesn't have to be. In some ways, they're harder to find then a pretty 20-something who's going expect his beauty go get our coins. 

Attitudes are genetically determined. As far as I feel, from my observation and upbringing, we’re all on the same plane. Hotties assume they’re above everybody. Either they were taught this or due to some internal fault they think otherwise. I generally steer clear of people who have Nazi-Esque ubermensch psychology. And most attractive female escorts think this way. So fuck them, they’re invariably not decent people and interpersonally nobody is “ above” anybody else. Can you say otherwise or price the contrary? 

[arnemgreeves]

On 11/26/2022 at 7:57 PM, Jamie21 said:

Oh! I was going down that list thinking:

yep, ‘finer things’ ugh pretentious..

’exclusive’ ….yep, I read excluding..

’Findom’…oh yes, total wankers! 

’invest in business’…lol it’s not a tech start up, it’s your ass. Agree.

’sugar daddy’….ugh yes I agree…fund my lifestyle because I’m too lazy to. 

’very busy schedule’ yes! he’s obviously always at the gym or in front of a mirror.

’5 star hotels only’ well ….maybe…I do have some sympathy, I’d not visit a client in a Premier Inn tbh (UK budget hotel chain). It’s easier to get in a 5 star too (I know how to walk in as if I own the place 😂)……..

….and then I got to ‘check out my Onlyfans’ and I thought oh!!! But then I though, no, it’s ok because I’m on justforfans - which is a much better platform.

Check out my Justforfans (link below)😂😂😂

What about Leonardos inn? Hardly the ritz but definitely not Premier Inn lol

[Jamie21]

17 minutes ago, arnemgreeves said:

What about Leonardos inn? Hardly the ritz but definitely not Premier Inn lol

Never heard of that place? 

[arnemgreeves]

48 minutes ago, Jamie21 said:

Never heard of that place? 

It was jury’s inn. They’re three or four star and in most major cities. 

[Jamie21]

22 minutes ago, arnemgreeves said:

It was jury’s inn. They’re three or four star and in most major cities. 

Ah yes they’re ok. 

[arnemgreeves]

On 11/26/2022 at 6:49 PM, DrownedBoy said:

Not all of them are jerks.

I've meet a handful who charged reasonable rates and were very nice and personable when we met.

However, I've also met hot guys who, when I texted them, acted like I should be honored that they're willing to grant me an audience. I don't need that.

Generally, the following statements in an RM ad are a red flag:

• enjoys the "finer things in life"
• is "exclusive and won't accept lowball offers"
• "FinDom." Enough said.
• looking for someone "to invest in their business"
• "looking for a Sugar Daddy"
• has "a very busy schedule" or "limited availability"
• only does outcalls in "5 star hotels"
• AND OF COURSE:  "Check out my OnlyFans site!"

They are all jerks. That’s good though I’ll just steeer clear of them and their fucking jerkiness. A pretty face and a good character don’t mix, ever. 

[Becket]

Interesting topic.  Experiences help define attitudes of course. Guess I've just been lucky.  The two most gorgeous men I've ever hired turned out to be men of strong character and overwhelming decency. The most enduring quality of each one continues to be a gentle heart and a tender soul.  Yes, there will always be money involved.  But I've gotten so much more out of the "transactions."  Thinking back over many years of this unusual hobby, the times when I hired just for sex were some of the most disappointing experiences; regardless of what the fellow looked like.  Some pop song in my foggy memory has the line, "you only get what you give."  Yeah, that has worked for me.

[+ nycman]

“The beautiful ones, they hurt u every time."

- Prince

[arnemgreeves]

On 12/2/2022 at 3:28 PM, nycman said:

“The beautiful ones, they hurt u every time."

- Prince

Good then I won’t book them. These are some facts of how the average pretty woman thinks:

elitist 

scummy

attention whore

Narcissistic 

think their clients should “ treat them human” but don’t extend the privilege. Yep that’s how humanity operates. 

anybody who says different is a liar and has their hand in the sand. Or is someone who thinks like a nazi (ye would love to engage with you). Or they live on a high horse and should challenge every bigoted and yes EVERY bigoted statement they EVER but they won’t since they’re insincere cowards lacking true life knowledge 😅😅 I won’t apologise for my thoughts nor should I.