Should I get fucked by a pro?

[LeeOz]

I am not a big fan of anal sex. My past experiences have mostly been uncomfortable or painful. I have enjoyed it only a handful of times. Reading the posts here though of people who absolutely loves it, I feel that I am missing out.

 

Should I give anal sex a try with a professional escort? Being in the business, would they have a better technique that would ensure me a better experience? Any advice?

[buckguy]

A pro as opposed to whom? Some random guy? Someone you know who isn't a clumsy partner? Your question is a little unclear, but given the nature of this board, I'll answer anyway.

 

I've never really liked bottoming and have tended to do it to provide some reciprocity or otherwise to be "nice" to a partner who usually let let me take my accustomed role. I still don't like to bottom, but I'm much more willing to do so having had a couple pro escorts help me on different occasions (Danny Cruz was my most recent instructor and he was first rate). A good bottom or at least a truly versatile guy can teach you a lot; you should be upfront that you're looking for a lesson, so they are in pedagogical frame of mind. This sort of thing helped me in terms of dealing with tightness, breathing (exhaling vigorously helped with the pain), etc. I also learned how to be a better top, too, and realized what I always suspected--most of my tops have simply been kindof clumsy in that role and sometimes in too much of a hurry.

[btmstudnyc]

Either get it from a pro....or from someone that you like a lot who is willing to play with your butt a long time. Try the dildos first... I tell people that if they can't stand that...how in the hell are they going to stand it with someone who wants to pound your butt.

 

I wouldn't try anyone extremely endowed...unless you like that fantasy ...but that may take a lot more than an hour...hehe

 

JIM

If it dont fit, force it

btmstudnyc@aol.com

[Juan Vancouver]

Better be a PRO while getting fucked....

 

Hey there!

One of my favourite subjects! :9

Since my cock is very thick, and very often I am chosen by first timers and virgins to experiment with bottomhood, ( maybe because I am bisexual, and yeah, I see no apparent reason for that either), I know a lot about the delicate arts of bottomhood from the perspective of the top.

Here are the few things one must remember.

First of all, it is YOU who is in control of the whole thing as a bottom. NOT the top. My recommendation is to train and exercise yourself when you are alone, have lots of time and patience, and dont feel the URGE to force the stuff to happen... Yeah, I know it sounds like homework, but thats precisely what it is. (If you can find a patient loving top to help you with your training, you are going to be a very lucky man)

Before sharing with you the 4 STEPS method (trade mark), I must stress something. NEVER try to get loose by force, drugs, or anesthetics, cause all you are going to create is structural damage, and a further rejection of getting anything in there. So, here we go...

 

STEP 1

"It is all in the mind" We have three ideas against us when we are trying to get fucked. "That is an -exit- channel, not an welcoming entering door." Mommy told us: "Dont touch yourself there! Thats nasty!" and finally, "A man getting fucked is simply wrong, one has to be masculine"

All the time while fucking a newbie, I notice that they keep contracting their sphincter, causing by that a lot of pain for them (even if pleasure for me) This is a voluntary muscle, and we can choose to relax it at will. By repeating in your mind the mantra "I want that cock inside... I deeply desire it" and focusing in opening, not fighting the sensation you are almost there. And of course, TONS of lube.

 

STEP 2

"Breath discomfort out of your body" Imagine that pain is a black thing attached to your body. As you inhale, focus on that pain trying to relax, and as you exhale deeply, in a controlled way, imagine how that black stuff (the pain) exits your body, leaving it painless, full of nothing but joy. Breeeaaaath deeeeeply.... and relaaaax... and of course LOTS of lube.

 

STEP 3

"Shakti Gawain would have told us: Creative visualization" Even if you are not a believer of new age stuff, apparently a clear image in your brain, helps the body to do the rest. Imagine your sphincter as a rose bud, totally closed and tight. While you repeat the step 1 mantra and breath as in step 2, close your eyes and SEE how that rose button is slowly but inexorably opening... blooming into full joy. Dont mock this techinque... it always works even for the ones who cannot create an image in their minds. The gurus out there say... "Imagine that you are imagining it, even if you cant see it"

And of course, PLENTY of lube.

 

STEP 4

"Smile" It has been proven that whenever certain muscles in your face are distended, the brain releases a rush of endorphines to your system giving you a surge of pleasure and relaxation. SMILE even if it does hurt a little. Even if you dont feel like smiling, make sure your lips are in a smile. You will be surprised by the results. And of course, an INDUSTRIAL amount of lube.

 

Doing this by yourself will allow you to have all the control and the trust. Dont force anything, you dont have to impress anybody. You just WANT that fat throbbing thing in there. You should practice with the tiniest thing first, they sell tiny dildos pinky sized. The goal is to have -something- inside and getting pleasure from it. If you can relax for the tiniest dildo and enjoy it, eventually you will be able to take in massive amounts of flesh that you would have been terrified to even look at in the past.

 

So Repeat "I WANT that cock in, I deeply desire it", while breathing joy and exhaling pain, while seeing in your mind's eyes how your rose bud blooms to total bottomhood, while you smile, extatic, entranced.... And sooner than you imagine, you will be receiving the hump of your life and knowing first hand why they were making such a fuzz about prostate stimulation...

 

HAPPY MOANING!:9

[AaronScottDC]

>Should I get fucked by a pro?

 

I really wouldn't mind getting fucked by a pro basketball player. Or, for that matter, a pro football or baseball player. But, I really get turned on by pro basketball players....... Yummy! }( :9

 

 

Aaron Scott DC

http://www.erados.com/AaronScottDC

http://www.male4malescorts.com/reviews/aaronscottdc.html

[bostonman]

>>Should I get fucked by a pro?

>

>I really wouldn't mind getting fucked by a pro basketball

>player. Or, for that matter, a pro football or baseball

>player. But, I really get turned on by pro basketball

>players....... Yummy! }( :9

 

Sounds good to me... :9

 

I guess it depends on how you view the score potential...I think a touchdown or home run sounds sexier than a mere two points...lol

 

(As much as I hate football, I'd love to be the tight reciever for a gridiron dude who's gonna score a touchdown up my ass...lol)

 

BTW - I appreciate this thread in all seriousness (especially Juan's advice) as I share LeeOz's feelings...and would also love to learn how to appreciate getting fucked better than I do now.

[LeeOz]

Thanks Jim. Very sound advice coming from someone whose motto is

 

>If it dont fit, force it

 

OUCH!!!!!! :+

[LeeOz]

RE: Better be a PRO while getting fucked....

 

>First of all, it is YOU who is in control of the whole thing

>as a bottom. NOT the top.

 

Really? But once they are in there and getting carried away, I only feel in control when I start screaming for them to stop.

 

>So Repeat "I WANT that cock in, I deeply desire it", while

>breathing joy and exhaling pain, while seeing in your mind's

>eyes how your rose bud blooms to total bottomhood, while you

>smile, extatic, entranced....

 

and fill yourself with LUBE, LUBE, LUBE. :7

 

Dr. Juan, thanks heaps for that fantastic 4-step program. Most entertaining. You are right though, I have to do a lot of homework. I guess I was hoping for an easy remedy, to see SUPER TOP ESCORT MAN and for him to suddenly bring me enlightenment to the pleasures of bottomhood.

 

Looking forward to your next sex advice Dr. Juan.

[VaHawk]

>I am not a big fan of anal sex. My past experiences have

>mostly been uncomfortable or painful. I have enjoyed it only

>a handful of times. Reading the posts here though of people

>who absolutely loves it, I feel that I am missing out.

 

OBVIOUSLY you don't like to be topped! Why do you INSIST on doing so? WHY does what other's find pleasurable and you don't generate some kind of feeling of "inadequacy on your part"?, that necessitates your going thru all kinds of "manipulation" to alleviate that feeling of indadequacy?

 

>Should I give anal sex a try with a professional escort?

>Being in the business, would they have a better technique that

>would ensure me a better experience? Any advice?

 

My advice is that if you like being topped or like deep throating, that, at least in my experiences, it is just "a natural desire", and when it is that natural, then you DON'T have to "practice" on dildos, butt plugs or whatever! A few times with someone you have the "HOTS" for is all that is needed to bring you up to "speed"!

 

Give it a try with someone who you are attracted to, as it is the physical attraction, and the subsequent kissing, foreplay, etc. that will put you in a relaxed enough mood to accomodate. After a few such encounters, you should have no problem afterwards. First thing you know, you'll be dropping the trousers in a dark alley while being fucked up the wazoo!

 

Obviously you don't have much experience with pro escorts! Very few, if any, are going to take the time, nor engage in the foreplay you need to "accomodate" your wishes and "bring" you up to speed! They are for the most part on the clock, and many of them can't even get it hard enough to accomodate you, unless you look like Prince William! If by perchance, you do INDEED give Prince Willy a run for his money, then by all means PROCEED in your pursuit of having a pro bring you up to speed!

[Nvr2Thick]

>I am not a big fan of anal sex. My past experiences have

>mostly been uncomfortable or painful. I have enjoyed it only

>a handful of times. Reading the posts here though of people

>who absolutely loves it, I feel that I am missing out.

>

>Should I give anal sex a try with a professional escort?

>Being in the business, would they have a better technique that

>would ensure me a better experience? Any advice?

 

"Uncomfortable or painful" is probably a good way to describe anal sex. To me, getting fucked when it's good is uncomfortable, painful, overwhelmingly intense, and great fun. Fortunately for me my first time was terrific -- I was so worked up for the scene that I was able to really enjoy the entire ride, and then I shot like a geyser all over him. He fucked me again about an hour later and I found myself cumming spontaneously.

 

The experience with second, third, and fourth guys weeks later were pretty darn unpleasant. The guys were hot and fun, but it just didn't work out well. If these had been my first encounters I might have assumed, as VaHawk suggests, that obviously I don't like being topped.

 

It sounds like you're thinking of going out on a mission to have a good experience as a bottom. You'd find the right escort and see if he knows how to make it good for you. It might work out if you find the right escort and things really click, but I think that you'd be placing too much pressure on the situation and things probably wouldn't go well.

 

You should probably just have fun with guys, escorts or otherwise, with no expectations of bottoming. If you find yourself really getting into the guy and the scene and he's a patient, attentive person you might go for it. Take advantage of the intimacy to tell him you want to try getting fucked, but explain that it's never been very good before and you want to take it slow.

 

I do think that finding a pro might help the situation, if by pro you mean a top with a reputation of seducing bottoms into great sex, not some aggressive stud in hurry to get through the sex. Even some of the well rated tops reviewed here are better suited to aggressive, intense, hardcore fucking (not that there's anything wrong with that.)

 

If you're determined to try it out I'd recommend Bruno in SF, as long as you're very clear about your needs and fears up front.

[Guest BronxTom]

I ave to agree with Juan from Vancouver. Wonderful words of advice my friend. I wish I lived in Vancouver.

 

Start slow. Focus on the pleasure. Don't force. Practice stimulating the outside of the anus first without plans of penetration. And proceed from there. You will be amazed at how much more relaxed you are when you aren't constantly thinking, "When's it going in?" Once you get a sense of the pleasure you will slowly (or perhaps quickly) be ready for further exploration.

 

It's been said already but what ruins anal sex for most people are tops AND bottoms who are not prepared and have high expectations. Real life doesn't always work like a porn video. The top doesn't snap his fingers and it just happens. Likewise, the bottom just can't snap his fingers and make it happen either.

 

There are power bottoms and tops out there but I believe most of us need preperation, time, and conversation.

 

A partner once said he felt talking about sex (what felt good, what didn't) took away from the spontaneity of it. I told him that the brain is the number one sexual organ and talking about sex makes it better sex.

 

I also believe that the hottest sex is where penetration and orgasm are not goals. It's about sharing pleasure.

 

All this and still single. Sigh.

[LeeOz]

Thank you to everyone for your advice. Your posts were very helpful. I guess it does not matter if it is a date or an escort, the timing, chemistry and situation needs to be right for me to enjoy bottoming.

[Michael]

Yes, and at the end of the day it still may be something that you don't really enjoy.

 

If this is something that *you* want to explore then fine, go ahead, but don't let anyone tell you that just because you are a gay man you *must* like being fucked (and, by implication, that there is something "wrong" with you if you don't).

 

Different people like different things - it *may* be that you just need a little help to enjoy being fucked, or it may be that you just don't like it ...

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

Another Escort Escorts

 

>>I am not a big fan of anal sex. My past experiences have

>>mostly been uncomfortable or painful. I have enjoyed it only

>>a handful of times.

. . .

 

>>Should I give anal sex a try with a professional escort?

>>Being in the business, would they have a better technique

>>that would ensure me a better experience? Any advice?

 

 

>Obviously you don't have much experience with pro escorts!

>Very few, if any, are going to take the time, nor engage in

>the foreplay you need to "accomodate" your wishes and "bring"

>you up to speed! They are for the most part on the clock, and

>many of them can't even get it hard enough to accomodate you,

>unless you look like Prince William!

 

 

You have received some excellent opinions from many of these client and Juan. Essentially, you have enjoyed anal sex a few times, just not every time. You could potentially benefit from an experienced partner and while I would not believe it is necessary to go to a "pro," I would also disagree that your needs and "wishes" would not be "accomodated." I often get some "first timers" or near virgins; I always discuss with them what they need to know about preparation and relaxation. I also try to spend enough time to make sure they can enjoy themselves as much as possible. But I also suggest that they might practice with others, if possible.

 

For some clients, this is not practical or realistic. However, I think you should only proceed - either with an escort or a "non-professional" if this is something you really want to explore, not simply something you think you need to do or you might be missing out on. Good luck!

 

http://www.gaydar.co.uk/francodisantis

[Guest DevonSFescort]

>I am not a big fan of anal sex. My past experiences have

>mostly been uncomfortable or painful. I have enjoyed it only

>a handful of times. Reading the posts here though of people

>who absolutely loves it, I feel that I am missing out.

 

There are people who absolutely love scat, too. Do you feel that you are missing out by not doing scat scenes?

 

>Should I give anal sex a try with a professional escort?

 

"Should" you? How does "should" enter into it? You CAN give anal sex a try, if you want to. What I'd say you "should" NOT do is want to want something you don't want. Do you think wanting to have a dick up your ass will make you a good gay?

 

>Being in the business, would they have a better technique that

>would ensure me a better experience?

 

Maybe, maybe not.

 

>Any advice?

 

Yeah. Do what YOU like to do in bed, and don't worry about, or feel beholden to, other people's ideas about what gay men are supposed to do in bed. It's great to be open to new experiences, and even to trying things that you didn't think you liked -- but ideally this would be with a sex partner who stimulates that desire in you. If you want to hire an escort, hire an escort; don't take a checklist to bed, and have YOUR idea of fun. If, in the course of your session, you find yourself wanting to try getting fucked, then try getting fucked if he's up for it and there are condoms at hand.

 

There are "natural tops" for whom "any port in a storm" will do. There are "natural bottoms" who can't live without objects up their butts. For other people, it absolutely matters who the top is and/or who the bottom is, and there's just no way to know in advance whether the stranger you hire is that top or that bottom. For still others, anal sex just isn't their thing, and there's no reason why they should give a flying fuck what all the insatiable tops and insatiable bottoms think about that.

[AaronScottDC]

>Yeah. Do what YOU like to do in bed, and don't worry about,

>or feel beholden to, other people's ideas about what gay men

>are supposed to do in bed.

 

>If you want to hire an escort, hire an escort; don't take a checklist >to bed, and have YOUR idea of fun.

 

>There are "natural tops" for whom "any port in a storm" will

>do. There are "natural bottoms" who can't live without

>objects up their butts. For other people, it absolutely

>matters who the top is and/or who the bottom is, and there's

>just no way to know in advance whether the stranger you hire

>is that top or that bottom. For still others, anal sex just

>isn't their thing, and there's no reason why they should give

>a flying fuck what all the insatiable tops and insatiable

>bottoms think about that.

 

 

Very, very well said!

 

 

Aaron Scott DC

http://www.erados.com/AaronScottDC

http://www.male4malescorts.com/reviews/aaronscottdc.html

[LeeOz]

;( ;( I feel as if I have just been a very, very bad boy, and been scolded by Principal Devon.

 

Thank you for your post Devon, and what you say rings very true, but surely, you cannot blame this poor soul for trying. For a long time now, I have not indulged in anal sex, because I have not enjoyed it. I am a very sensual and oral person, so have used that instead with my sex partners. I have not had many relationships, so have not had the opporturnity to explore fucking with an ideal sex partner. I am single right now. But I know I have lost out on pick-ups in the past, because of my limited "repertoire". Since I have enjoyed anal sex a few times, then I thought, maybe it is just my technique or the top's technique that I need to tweek.

 

But I do see the points several of you have made here and thank you for them.

 

P.S. I did get fucked again recently and it felt good. I guess it helped heaps that my partner was not well-endowed.